September 3, 2001: School, Snowboarding, and life in general...I want to go snowboarding. As simple as that. I live, breathe, eat, drink, and ride. I made a comment to my parents that almost made me seem compulsive about it! I decided that I would give up running, my one sanity, for my other sanity: snowboarding. I am in constant search for a summer extreme sport at the moment, but boarding will be my life in the winter. I have tried skateboarding and that was quite unique. I can ride, but I have no talent what-so-ever in that sport. I believe my summer sport is hanging out with friends and icecream-eating. It sounds good for me! I just desperately want it to snow. It is s'posedly going to be a nice winter. Lots of snow. PRAISE ALLAH! Please explain epiphany. Okay. I just realized that I am a unique person. Very unique. I am sitting around in guy board shorts, a black sports bra, thinking about how my fun run this morning, smelling slightly like really cheap pot with lavander to cover the smell, listening to Beastie Boys and Staind, compiling all I want to write about in my mind, feeling slightly horrible but happy none-the-less, drinking water, and wishing it to snow when it is 85 degrees out. I just got through a day of Darcy and that was hell fun! Running was awesome today, but I still feel slightly feel like my stomach is being scooped out and that my butt has been replaced by a the iceburg that sunk the Titanic.. I need to go hang out with my friends again. To get this straight to my more unknowledgable readers, I don't smoke pot. I try to avoid it as much as possible. I turn into a hyper bitch when I get in the same room as the stuff. But my friend lives in a party house, some people decided to go light downstairs and the waft floats upstairs where I stake out my safe haven. It is really weird though. I have been around the stuff for at the max 4 days out of 5 months and I know the difference between the cheap stuff and the best. *sigh* I wish I could live my life in someone else's shoes sometimes. I am not ready for school. Actually I am, but everyone expects to hear that considering half of the teenage world dislikes school with a passion. I just don't want to throw myself back into the hug-meisters' grip, clingy people, and shallowness. But it shall be fun this year! I am making a poster to paste up in the new window of the office tomorrow morning announcing the return of The Mantis. Kelley's alter-ego and soon to be prankster. hehe.. I am going to keep a nice record so no one expects me. Only my close friends know it is me. MUAHAHA! eighyeayeah... This shall be interesting! Well, I was more into this this after noon, so tonight I shall write more! September 4, 2001So, how do you like my table attempt? Nice, hrm? E-Mail me about what I can change, will ya? I need some constructive e-mail anyways, so tell me about your life? Favorite color?! Okay, I'm desperate. Just ramble on about absolutely nothing for a few sentances and send it to me. I don't get enough e-mail. *giggles* Kelley's brain wave motive saying: "girl power! Chicks before pricks!" I have became in front of my very own eyes more girlfriend oriented than guys oriented. Even though I consider them still good friends, I will ditch (certain ones. If they are good guy friends, I'll stick with them) them for my girly friends. It is the way to go! Plus, It is easier and more fullfilling to talk about guys with girls, than it is with guys. Unless they are gay, and that is really weird. Not that I have anything against gay guys! I have a friend that is like that! I am just saying that having your best guy friend agree that the nicely tanned guy passing you has a nice ass. That is just odd. I have barely survived the first day of school! GO ME! I narrowly escaped another year of hugs from Tristen and I managed to remove myself from P.E. I am going to end up taking it next year, but hell! I deserve a year without! It might sucketh, but I believe I will have enough with X-C, snowboarding, and Track. I do enough physical activity, but if I have to I am going to have a athletic training sometime this winter. I am going to aspire to be a thrower in track season and I have to find some muscle on my meager jiggle infested arms. *hopes* I at least see the shoulder muscle definition after 5 weeks of X-C!! Others laugh, but I see it! The muscle is there! Honestly! Quit laughing. I know you are! *glares* Laugh all you want. I will show you all! I can be buff! It will just take longer than usual! My social skills need a bit of spit polish this school year. I am used to spending time with the multiples of friends over the summer and that is all fine and dandy. But the others in the school that I haven't seen for ages are another story. (Boy, I can't wait to see if I can get Isaac pissed at me again....That is fun!)But, as stated by a nice, colorful sign stratigically placed in the office window, "The Mantis Is Back!". Beware. People wonder who the mantis is. I don't know. Honestly, but I do tell people it is me. Just to cover for a friend. Only very, extremely trusted people are endowed with the knowledge of who The Mantis REALLY is. *laughs evil laugh* I have gotten hold of Darcy's Beveas and Butthead remote control. This remote came with a book that you read and press the buttons where they tell you too. I just like the remote! Going around school, pressing buttons at random at unsuspecting humans is fun! *yells "aaaaargh!"* that is one thing that the remote says. Most popular, though my all time fav is "Don't make me kick your ass!" That is especially fun! Beware Bonners Ferry citizens and school students/faculty. Kelley is out and hell just might break loose! *grins innocently* Honestly! I am a good kid! Too many thinking classes, but it will be fun! College prep english with Seley (drama teacher and all around funny person. Just blondish funny though...), Cisco with Katz ( I heard he does some in the back of that lab. I don't see it in him, but well, you never know..), Biology with Wages (She is a flipping cool teacher! even if she IS going to force genetics down my throat..), and of course Functional Analysis with *shudders* O'Dell. Well, anyone who is anyone knows O'Dell, so no explaination needed. I just have an advantage over a lot of people. I take X-C! BAH! eat my dust! Unless I drop out again, but I don't think that will happen anytime soon. Unless I get a Danial-esque boyfriend and all my grades go Kaplooiie and I go into a 4 month depression again. But that won't happen, because I am going to be a B.I.T.C.H. this year. Babe In Total Control of Herself. *smiles* and I can do it too, for all those who doubt me! Note to self: Study like hell and beg parents for nice calculator. Mr. Catron is skeptical of my ability to sound signifficantly good on the drums. Well, will he be surprised when I can actually make the set nice sounding. Multicolors, sore scratches, and 39 seconds
Today was one of those days you wake up in a damned good mood and no matter what happens, what music you listen to, or how sore you are ever dampens your happiness. I was so exceptionally happy today that I painted my nails. 3 different colors. Even spent the time to do 3 coats for each finger of each color, waiting for each coat to dry completely before making it more wonderfully colorful. Left hand s a slightly more transparent (even though all of them would be such if held in the light) purple. This took many coats and recoats. Right hand is a baby blue mysteriously called "He's Mine". Now I am wondering if I wear it, any guy "is mine". Oh well.. My feet are oddly hot pink. Of all colors, I chose hot pink. I about had a premature hear attack when I looked at my feet later on. I am not used to having bike reflecters as nails.
Have you ever had one of those feelings that you were unknowingly yet conciously being suckered into something? You don't want to get into a relationship, but somehow being broken slowly down and what you say completely altered to have some meaning that you DO like him? well... This is what happens to me. I end up majorly flirting with a good friend of mine. Unfortunately, he is an exboyfriend of my best friend and I don't know if he is using me as rebound to get his mind off her or not. I majorly slipped today and now he thinks I am really into him. He just is really good at hetting me, erm.... bluntly put, horny. He is persistant, yes, on the friends with benifits thing. He thinks it will make it easier for me if I don't have a title to the relationship. I DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP! Just play with guys minds.. I could just play this out for the fun of it, I'm just afraid to. For those who know, (shannon: think puppy) he has personality aspects cloned from the puppy's pity tripping techniques. EEK!
Our x-country team went to Whitworth yesterday. Ran with the "Big Dogs". Meade, Lakeside, Mead...Mead was huge! Their JV beat our varsity. Between Forest (first of course..) and Aaron was the whole Mead varsity. It was sickeningly too much bright panther colors. Half the meet was in bright neon yellow. It was insane. Not as insane as the whole day, but insane none the less. Bus left at 7 A.M. The way it went, we could have left at 10! We arrived and found no buses, no high school xc race. Just a bunch of old people running/walking/escaping from the zoo a Race for Women run...IT wasn't (as we finally found out) until 2 that afternoon. As the whole Bonners Ferry X-Country team sat around BS-ing for 4 hours straight, the sane people who don't run slept. And enjoyed sleeping. It gets interesting, honestly! We walked the course, stretched, got a lecture about how much water we should be drinking, and ran.
To make a long entry somewhat shorter, we ran, ran damned well, and I cut 39 seconds off my 3 mile time! And it was a longer race, and with more hills than the one before! *jumps for joy* even though I am 7th in varsity, I am happy. I got my goals straight!
Well, tomorrow I am threatened to be left behind if I am not in Baird's car by 7:45. NIGHT!
I have written half of my thoughts about this hellish terrorism on paper, and really don't want to share it with the world at this moment. Mostly because I haven't fully compiled it into my head yet. It all seems so surreal and movie-ish that I can barely contimplate the nation's body being drawn to the ground by 2 planes, and hundreds of people killed for no great reason except to gain leverage. I can't stand it. This shows how cowardish that these hell born people are, because they have the audacity to willingly kill people of another country in the name of their government or religion. Aren't they supposed to be for the people? Unite the people?! Respect the people?! Respect is something I will ever expect from anyone of these countries that decided that stratigically crash planes into a high population area with full fucking gas tanks. Yeah, they're cool. not really. I hope that justice is found against these terrorists. If their point was to make the US fall, they failed. If it was to disperse the US, they also failed. If it was to weaken the US, they failed once more. If nothing more, it has brought our country closer together, stronger because we are united again, and a tad bit smarter. I believe these terrorists will regret what they did and actually see the light.
Willy Wonka is an asshole-ish prick who owns unproportional, short dudes that look like mini-Richard Simons. Imagine Richard Simons with green hair, 3 feet tall and hips that are about as wide as is tall. Multiplied by who knows how many this psyco has in his possesion and you have these little dudes. Half the people who are on this movie need phycological help, bunk in an asylum for a few months, be put on retilin or some other mood altering substance, and well possibly drug treatment. Willy Wonka looks like he is stoned 24/7 and he isn't a very nice person. One of those you would expect molest little kids while they are hyped up on sugar and slightly frightened by little green headed people in white. I believe there is something wrong with that movie...
I dislike PMS. I really do. I become so frusterated with the simple things like getting hit in the head with a door or teasings from baldie. I start making myself believe that I am doing nothing right, nothing goes my way (even though nothing usually does) and I am not my socially hyper self. I am hyper self when I want to be and have nothing depressing on my mind. Which, as the past week has gone, has been very few times. So, sorry for my mindless (to the average observer.. I am actually thinking way to hard about important life threatening things that will never happen anywhere close to me.) self. I will probably be staring off into nothingness and giving short answers to absolutly nothing. So, yeah. I gotta go.. Later!
Well, I am proud. It took me about 3 weeks, but I did it. I finally ate the whole bag of them. And I never thought I liked them. Actually, I don't think I like them all too much, but just wanted to prove to myself that I could eat healthy, and Dried apricots were the most healthiest thing I could think of at the moment. Now I am doomed to having an insanely sweet apricoty taste in my mouth. I can't believe I just ate that anywhosy. 40 oz. of pure, squishy, yellowy fruitness in a bag. The last being digested right this moment. Those lat 8 sticky masses of s'posed healthfullness being part of the 2 bananas I consumed only an hour and a half earlier. *sighs* I am going to be healthy, but I won't give up chocolate to do so. Just chocolate that is given to me. Self indulgences are okay. Peer pressure isn't. That is how I put it.
I just had a nice reminder that I put a sound scheme on my computer. I start pressing on anonymous buttons like usual and there is an unusual "blep" sound emitted from my speakers. I blink. I close what I just opened, and there is a decreasing sounded "blip". I blink once more. Then the light turns on. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! Sound scheme. Not bad music, but a annoying sound scheme. I will have to change that sometime when I have enough motivation to do so. Probably when the constant "blep"s continue for about antoher week or so. I have computers that make sounds. I could probably annoy me and everyone else who is sorry enough to use this computer out of their minds with Keyboard soundschemes. Hehehehe! that would be fun! Every key would make a noise, the "G" would scream and the "O" would "phrip" and the "Z" would probably do something else computery. HEHEHE! I just might do that....*thinks*
Unusually happy day, Kelley had. Except for the sudden pain that has found home in my back calf. Grrr.... I dislike pain. I really do.
Well, I just was exceptionally happy today. I don't know why, but I was. It was fun. I like being happy. A lot more people talk to you and you end up feeling good about yourself and have a lot of other things to say. I mean, heck! I was actually social! Unlike Kelley's alter-ego PMS babe. (I'll need a name for her... I have Jade as my flirty slut personality, and Alexia ( I believe so, I have to ask Sara on that..) as my Bitchy personality. I am also Ling-Ling the chineese whore and Bondage Betty. I wouldn't ask on the last one, just knod and smile. Knod and smile.. That is what I do in Wage's class... and Katz's class, and Bonell's class.... no others though.. (HA! I bet you thought I was going to say all of my classes! I win..)
Well, I am going to go read "Earth Abides" and try to find some less confusing in my school work. Good night!
I have a new cd. Actually I have Shannon is a lakeland traitor. hehe. right-o. Starting shot fired, I bolted out. I don't bolt. It was more of a chaotic attempt to find a spot that wasn't dead last like usual. I found it at one person behind me. Whole race I was thinking, "move that ass, Kelley!", "Give Mr. O'Dell a heart attack. Race for the death of the bastard.", and "Okay, catch up and don't let the people re-pass.." I actually stayed awake for that whole race! The whole race! One of the first and it was one of my best races. Passed, killed, dominated, and we even had music on the course! "follow the music, run towards the music!" Well, I liked the race, non the less. I was so flipping ahead of almost every one I passed, it was awesome! And of course, if I had enough confidence, I could have passed the yellow girl and beat Amy's time and still be on varsity. But no matter. I had fun.
Someone e-mail me. Please. Click this to do so. Send me arguements, send me interesting conversation. Tell me how I am messing up my life! I can't say I will get back to you soon, but I like reading and conversing with people. Also, do you think I should switch to diary-x? I could so Shannon could make me a pretty layout. but HTML is so fun! go to iratesquirrel cause I said so.
"It is your liver! You clean it up!" Mark from Biology
Well, at this moment my feet are frozen stiff, I am annoyed at my computer for freezing on me when reading a diary, I am questioning my very existance or at least what I am doing with my pathetic life, wondering if I will be able to make grades this quarter, and really happy about my X-country time at Sunfair this weekend. There is a lot more going through my head, but those are the main ones that pop out at me. I will probably figure out more later on..
Well, I got a ribbon. A RIBBON! I placed (I like saying this!) 26th out of 66 girls in my race. I ran a 23:56 or something like such on a 3 mile course in the biggest race our whole season. 3000 people, 5 hours away from home, and surrounded by bagels, our whole team did the best we could have done in O'Dell's eyes. NOt only was the team extremely giddy, our coach (satan) was estatic at how well we all did. Varsity kicked arse, our others made top 50. TOP 50!!! That is awesome. I believe I have some random thoughts written about it somewhere, but finding them would mean more movement, and I don't think so. I deserve a day with minimal movement cause I cut my time and placed in one of the biggest races in the northwest. BOO YA!
Our XC team is very diverse. I believe we sat at the back of the bus for 2 hours discussing killing babies, society, war, the WTC crashes, religion, and anything else wonderfully discussable. Oh yeah! Barbarianism and the end of the world. But then, we all dispersed and there were 3 main groups. 4 if you include Meadow and Matt. They sat in the back doing something that is not of my knowledge right now. I don't really think I am going to go into that story right now, enwho.
3 groups of the xc bus:
---1)Daniel, Kaitlyn, Amy group and groupies
---2)Anonymous people hitting eachother over the head with Gatorade bottles
---3)Musically inclined group consisting of Andrew, Tim (ketchup boy), Heath, Kelley, and oddly, Brandon's hand. (don't ask...)
Well, lets just say it was the funniest trip and I think O'Dell is going to be more uptight and disciplinary with the noise level with 30 some on the same bus compared to 15 as of last year. Hehe.. Poor him and Bonell... *smiles evilly*
Okay, new to the list, I'm thirsty. Like I was on the bus coming back last night. I sat there in a bouncing bus for 2 straight hours have to go to the restroom soo bad that I switched positions every minute or so. I didn't want to bend over to retrieve batteries for my headphones for fear of my over-active bladder.... *sighs* why me. I didn't drink anything for the rest of the bus ride. Paranoia I thinketh.
Forenzic Profiler. That will be my career when I get older. I have decided that I wanted to go into forenzics a while ago, but I don't like touching death, bloody, mutilated, eyeless corpses so I think I will just work with the data and evidence to figure it all out. Mother dearest and I had a murder/serial killer conversation about how they are sick bastards and different criminal books while watching scary movies on tv. All day. It was a comforting tv time with mother. I don't usually do that, so it is nice. Then, of course, Jeremy comes by right when my mom is explaining "Rebecca" to me. Grrrr... oh well, life is confusing. especially him. (yes, shannon, I did get into a relationship with him. *smiles feebly* talk about that later.....) He is just always in the need of constant comforting. I don't know what to make out of it.
Well, this writting experience is getting stale so I shall leave with a wonderful XC quote between daniel and Tyler.
"Okay, Tyler, your turn to be homosexual now. I want to be hetereosexual now." ~Daniel to Tyler~
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