Mr. Wonderful Talks Politics

1999: Sophomores Fail AIMS
1999: Microsoft Ruled Monopoly
1999: Reps Defeat Nuclear Treaty
1999: Sarandon, O'Donnell Anti-Gun
1999: Clinton's Africa Jaunt, $43mm
1999: CATO "No Return to Draft

1999: Drudge "Bush Hid Records"
1999: Congress Discusses Farm Aid
1999: The Hubris of Buchanan
1999: Tune-in, Drop-out, Generation
1999: Bush Answers Drug Question

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90% of AZ Sophomores Fail AIMS Test!
After sitting on the failing results for weeks, the Arizona Department of Education reluctantly released the AIMS test outcome. Ninety percent of Arizona high school sophomores failed the test! The actual problem doesn't stem from mass idiocy by the student body, but from imbecilic educators whom had included many math concepts in the test that the students had never been exposed to. Many concepts, which Gene Glass, A.S.U.'s associate dean of the College of Education, says are appropriate only for those students going on to careers in the high-tech and scientific fields. Keegle Exercise But this doesn't stop Arizona Superintendent of School's, Lisa Graham Keegan from insisting on a $160 million increase in the State budget in order to insure all students will pass the AIMS test math section. And some of you want Washington to have a larger hand in Arizona education? Dolts!
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Federal Judge Rules Microsoft a Monopoly !
Monopoly Game Bill Gate's Stool On Friday, November 5th, 1999, U.S. District Judge Thomas Penfield Jackson ruled Microsoft a 'monopoly.' A talking-head inadvertently exposed why the Fed's are so upset with Microsoft, when he intoned, "Why, they are almost a government unto themselves..." And we all know that this government cannot allow another monopoly/government to exist.
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Republicans Defeat Nuclear Test-Ban Treaty !
sauteed mushroom cloud Of course the liberal Democrats, who are still mourning the fall of Communist Soviet Russia, claimed the GOP has sentenced "the children" to die in the next, no doubt, nuclear World War. What you did not hear from the blathering talking-head millionaire morons on the major news networks is that China and Russia, our nuclear armed rivals, refused to allow the installation of any devices that would assure they did not explode any nuclear weapons, violating the 'Test-Ban Treaty.' Now, does it make much sense for the United State Senate to ratify a treaty where all signers of that document realize that the United States is the only country that will actually abide by the terms of said treaty? (For those not familiar with nuclear weapons, they must be periodically tested, ie., detonated, because the fissionable materials deteriorate over time and that deterioration could actually cause the warhead to not provide the expected nuclear devastation.)
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Rosie, after make-up magic Rosie, before make-up magic Sarandon & O'Donnell Begin Anti-Gun Ads
Susan Sarandon & Rosie O'Donnell, dedicated anti-Constitutionalist's, will appear in a number of anti-gun ads. These wealthy gals, who live behind guard-gated communities, ride in bullet-proof limousines, fly chartered private jets and are perpetually surrounded by private, armed guards, cannot comprehend why 'Joe Citizen' would ever find the need to own a firearm ...
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$43 million African tail?
Clinton's Africa Trip Cost $43 Million!
The Washington Times reports that Clinton's African "Apology for Slavery Tour 1998" will cost the American Taxpayers 43 million hard-earned dollars. Where are all the media pundits decrying the expense of the deserved Starr Investigation now? Did they go on the trip? They might have, because the tour comprised of 1,300 individuals! Incredible! And most American voters are ambivalent towards the federal government's increasingly large bite of their paychecks. In Arizona, the citizens know more and care more about the DiamondBack Baseball team than about how the 28% to 50% of their gross income is spent by these so deserving folks in Washington! And that's the plan and THE PLAN is working...
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Cato Inst.Logo The Cato Institute Reports: "Return to draft isn't needed,"
"Won't solve the military's recruitment shortfall. Retention problems a result of frequent and frivolous deployments." And what news does Mr.Wonderful hear when he arises at 4:00 AM to monitor his various world wide listening devices, radios,shortwaves and televisions? Mr. Wonderful learns that our 'peace-keeping' force in Kosovo is guarding a graveyard, protecting its residents from desecration! Our soldiers literally guarding the dead! Pathetic!
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red blood
Matt Drudge Reports G. W. Bush Hides Medical Records !
All these guys I was jealous of in college and high school are now paying the price for being pretty, personable, and promiscuous. Clinton, George W. ,, are now atoning for the STD generated spirochetes that never, ever go away! Spirochetes that will forever barge their way into any blood test. Party On Boys ! Har! Har! Har!
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Animal Farm Congress Discusses Farm Aid Package!!
Why are farmers, aka, 'agri-business' always provided federal funds?
Between health care providers and farmers there are more government-made millionaires than all other industries combined. Why wasn't there Congressional 'Electrical Wholesalers AID' when the small Electrical Wholesalers (aka Mr.Wonderful) were under intense pressure by the banks? Electrical Wholesaler's aren't as important as Farmers? Try to run a farm without electricity! Even the Amish now use electricity!
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Buchanan Hubris Unbelievable!! Ten!
Without a prayer of winning the Presidency, Mr.Buchanan bolts to the 'Reform Party.' How can any, any conservative turn away from the GOP, with the impossible intent of becoming President under a third party? Under a third party founded and funded by the Whack-Job Big-Eared Texas Elf made billionaire by the federal government? Is the big ego of a middle aged former Nixon speech writer going to doom this country to another four years of liberal horseshit?
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Tune In, Drop Out Generation Now Governing ! Tim Leary on LSD
George W. Bush III facing drug use accusations (whether true or not) brings to light that many of our future leaders will have used illegal drugs in their distant, or not so distant past.
Mr.Wonderful remembers that in the 1960s, Life Magazine was advocating the use of L.S.D. !! Today's members of the media, being liberal arts students in college, and by definition, high on illegal drugs during their entire matriculation, cannot comprehend that a peer did not snort cocaine.
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Bush Answers 'Drug' Question ! G.W.Bush
"Haven't used drugs in twenty five years..."
Next questions Media to ask Bush:
1)Did you ever cause an abortion?
2)Are you still beating your wife?
3)Were you the second gunman on 'the grassy knoll?'

Why it doesn't matter what Clinton says about His own drug usage:
On July 29, 1999, President Clinton was fined $90,000 by Judge Weber for lying under oath about his relationship to the remora-like Monica Lewinsky.
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