These are real standing laws from around the United States of America.
1. A man can legally beat his wife, but no more than once a month.
1. It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
1. Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.
2. In, LA, a man may legally beat his wife with a leather strap, as long as it is less than 2 inches wide, or she gives him permission to use a wider strap.
3. It is a misdemeanor to shoot any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
1. You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
2. You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
1. In Quitman, it is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
2. In Columbus, it is illegal to sit on one's porch in an indecent position.
1. Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
2. A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
3. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
4. It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
5. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
1. It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets.
2. In Chicago, it is illegal to take a french poodle to the Opera.
3. According to state law, it is illegal to speak English. The officially recognized language is "American."
4. In Joliet, it is illegal to mispronounce the name Joliet HeyWoodey.
1. Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
2. Citizens are not allowed to attend a movie house or theater nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic.
3. Monkey's are forbidden to smoke cigarettes in South Bend.
1. Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
1. By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
2. It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
1. It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
2. Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."
1. Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
2. Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
3. It is illegal to wear a goatee without a license.
4. North Andover prohibits its citizens from carrying "space guns."
5. In 1659, the state outlawed Christmas.
1. It is illegal to tease skunks.
2. Every man in Brainerd is required by law to grow a beard.
1. A State law stipulates that a woman's hair legally belongs to her husband.
2. Under State law, dentists are officially classified as "mechanics."
1. In Whitehall, it is illegal to operate a vehicle with ice picks attached to the wheels.
2. It is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.
1. If a child burps during a church service in Omaha, his or her parents may be arrested.
2. It is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license
1. On Staten Island, it is illegal for a father to call his son a faggot or queer in an effort to curb girlie behavior.
2. In NYC, "it is disorderly conduct for one man to greet another on the street by placing the end of his thumb against the tip of his nose and wiggling the extended fingers of that hand."
1. It is illegal to make love on the floor of a hotel room between two double beds.
1. Whale hunting is strictly forbidden.
2. People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.
1. In Columbus, it is illegal for stores to sell corn flakes on Sunday.
2. In Oxford, it is illegal for a woman to disrobe in front of a man's picture.
3. In Youngstown, it is illegal to run out of gas.
1. The town of Hood River prohibits the act of juggling without a license.
1. "Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the motorist must take his car apart piece by piece, and hide it under the nearest bushes."
1. It is illegal to throw pickle juice on a trolley.
1. It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
2. In Dyersburg, it is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
3. In Memphis, it is illegal for a woman to drive by herself; "a man must walk or run in front of the vehicle, waving a red flag in order to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists."
1. The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned because it contains a formula for making beer at home.
2. It is illegal to milk another person's cow.
1. A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife in his presence.
1. In Richmond, it is illegal to flip a coin in any eating establishment to determine who buys a cup of coffee.
2. In Lebanon, it is illegal to kick your wife out of bed.
1. It is illegal to deny the existence of God.
2. It is illegal to whistle underwater.
3. Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.