JOKES, JOKES and more
JOKES.........
Stealing of Turkey
Gholo and Jasem decided to steal a turkey in a house.Jasem waited outside
of the house and Gholo jumped over the wall,into the house and caught
the turkey.All of the sudden the turkey started to scream...gholooo
ghooloo ghooloo, ghoolooo ghooolo, ghoolloo....
Gholo got scared, throw the turkey on the floor and told jasem: Volek
faraar koon ke yarooo shenaasee :)
Gholo Scapes from Iran
Gholo wanted to illegally scape from Iran.He went near the border and
found out that some people enter sheep's costum ( Poste Goosfand) and
along with other sheeps pass the border without getting caught.Gholo
thought he found the way.
Gholo got's in a sheep's costum and entered the crowd of sheeps.But the
moment he wanted to pass the border,the police caught him and threw him in
the jail.
Gholo was very upset and asked the police: Volek een hamee adam raftaand
tooye
pooste Goosfand va az maarz raad shoodaand.Too cheraa moo yekee roo deedee?
Police said: Akhe Pedarsokhtee, Kodoom Gosfandee eeynake Rayban mezanee?
:)
How long Did it Take to Build Abadan's
Palayeshgaah ??
They asked somebody from Esfehan; How long did it take to build
Sey-o-Se-poul ? He answered, ohh we did not have good equipement at the
time and it took us about a year and half to build it.They asked somebody
from Tehran; How long did it take to build Shahyad ?? He answered, ohh it
was very hard to build that since is a tall.It took us about two years to
finish that.
They went to Abadan and saw Gholo is wearing his Rayban and is leaning on
a wall near the Palayeshgah.They asked him, Gholo, How long did it take
to build this Palayeshgaah ? Gholo turned around and looked at the
Palayeshga and said " Volek Moo emrooz soobh azz eenjaa raad shoodoom,
eeen eeenjaa nabood" :)
Jange Khoroos
A Khoroos from Abadan got into a fight with a Khoros-e Mahalee.All of the
sudden Khoroos-e Mahalee jumped on the khoros from Abadan and beat him up
so bad that he lost all his feather.Other khoroos who were watching the
fight, went to the Khorose Abadani and asked him why he could not beat up
the other khoros !!.Khorose Abadani said "Volek bereed oonvaar , moo
tazee lookht shoodoom" :)
Gholo returnes from Iraq
Gholo which was a prisoner of war returnes from Iraq.All the reporters
surrounded him to interview him.They asked him how it was in Iraq.He said,"
Volek Iraqi tortured us physically and mentally day and night".
The
reporters asked him to describe the kind of torture Iraqi used.He
said,"Volek their mental torture was that they brought a bag full of
Rayban glasses in the prison every morning and they broke every single
one of them infront of us.Their physical torture was that they tight our
legs and hands so we could not move, then they played Bandari music and danced
Bandari infront of us :)
Last Laaf
Gholo was in a ship travelling.All of the sudden something went wrong and
the ship started to drawn.The capitan told everybody that the weight was
too much for the ship and if somebody volunteer to jump off the ship, the
rest of people would survive.Gholo said, "Moo meeparoom".Before Gholo
jump off the ship, they asked him if he had any message for his
family.Gholo said," Ha, be nanam begeed ke Gholo fada laafe akhareesh
shood. :)
Swiming (sent by Kolahdoz)
Yek rooz yek Ahvazi ba yek Abadani Daashtand Nazdike Pole Ahvaz Raah Mie
raftand. Marde Ahvazi be Abadani Miege : Bia Berim Zire in Pol Shena
Konim, Abadani Javab Mideh : Volak, Man Jaie ke Kooseh Nadashte bashe
Shena nemikonam.
Fight
Gholo got into fight with a big guy.Before gholo could make a move, the big
guy gave him a few punches and beat the hell out of him in no time.Then
the he lifted him up in the air and he was about to throw him on the
ground.Gholo who was breathless looked at the crowd who were watching the
fight and said " kho Volek, shoma megeeen eenoo chekareesh konoom ? ".
Announcement
Too abadan hamishe vaghti hava tarik mishe, toye baland-goye masjed elam
mikonand: "Hava tarik shode, becheha lotfan rayban-a shono dar
biyarand.
Baby
Be ye "KA" goftand, to chera inghad zeshti?!
KA: "Dast ro delom nazar ka. Moghei ke beche bodom to zayeshgah avazom
kardand!!
Airplane crash
Yek havapeima dar hale soghot bod, va kaptane havapeima ba forodgah
tamas migire va az ona mikha ke yek havapeima dige vase komak
beferestand. Mote-assefane havapeimaye kochek miferestand. Kaptan majbor
mishe ke aval bacheha va zanha ro befereste toye on havapeima.
Va agar badan ja bod mardha ro befereste.Bad az inke zanha va bacheha
raftand, ja baraye hame mardha nabod.Kaptan tasmim migire ke az hame
emtehan begire(ettelaat- ommomi). Az avali miporse,ghanon nesbiyat mal
ki bode.Yaro javab mide "einstein" va savare havapeima mishe.Dovvomi va
sevvomi ham dorost javab midan ta belakhare be "KA" mirase. Az "ka"
miporse, jazre 100 chand mishe? "KA" gij mishe va har kari mikone
namitone javab bede. "KA" akharesh khaste mishe va be kaptan mige:
"ka, ja nadari bego ja nadarim, in soala chiye dige".
Tehran kaabi(sent by amir Bahmanyari)
tehran kaabi pesersh jasam-e mibereh cinema rex.
chon deer miresan rahnema ba cheragh lait mia
beshon sandely neshoon bedeh. tehran yemartebeh
jasemeh mikeshe kenar migeh "bia baba invar motory
bet nezeneh volek...".
Tehran kaabi#2(sent by
amir bahmanyari)
tehran mireh orupa. kheylee delesh berey abadan
tang mishe. donbal-e abadania migardeh. mardom besh
migan baba inja sooedeh khoda roo kool na istgah
haft, ghaneh nemishe. ta ye rooz ye peykan shomareh
abadan mibineh. midoveh ye mikh var midareh mikoneh
to tireh machineh, domaghe-she mizareh demeh
soorakh, nefas mikesheh migeh "mmmm, hhawaye
wattann".....
It is time to ask
yourself
Laaf (sent by Payam Ghanbarzadegan)
One Abadani was asked:" what's 2 multiplied by 2?" Abadani thought for
a while and then answered: "5". They said:" huh? We have asked others
and they said it was 4. How can you say 5?" Abadani answered:"
panjomish maleh laafeshe" :)
Contamination (sent by Foad Noori)
The shark who ate an Abadani, went to his friends and said "I am a
whale".
Poster (Sent by Foad Noori)
One day Golnavazan went to a poster shop in London and asked if they had a
Golnavazans poster. The shop keeper looked at him in maze and said no.
Golnavazan hit his forehead with his palm, shaking his head said "eenja ham
tamoum shod".
Winter Laaf (Sent by Foad Noori)
One becheh Abadan had stood in a street in the middle of a cold winter,
wearing
a short sleeve white shirt and hanging an overcoat emrikayee on his
shoulder
while trembling with cold. They told him why dont you put your overcoat on.
Becheh Abadan while trembling and trying to take the control of his shaking
teeth said "Kaa mey laaf meezareh".
Dehydration (Sent by Foad Noori)
An Abadani was dying from dehydration in the desert. Crawling on the
desert hot
sand he was murmuring water...water...water. Then he saw a little amount of
water in a hole behind a stone. He dragged himself towards the water, put his
hand in the water and put his hair back into the style.
Se Dareh (Sent by Foad Noori)
Shirazi asked the Abadani why do you always say -se dareh- why you never say
-char dareh- ?
Abadani said; Kaa begom char dareh kho se dareh
Eshghe Dava (Sent by Foad Noori)
An Arab guy who had eshghe dava and wanted to have a fight, saw a little fell
seating in a corner. He thought this is good, I go and beat him. So he
goes tothe fell and says; Haas deerouz cheat bud?. The fella says nothing,
I was just minding my own business
The Arab guy says; Emrouz cheeteh? The fella says nothing, I just mind my own
business
The Arab brings his finger up and while shaking it in front of the fellas
face says "nabinam farda cheet basheh".
Wrong sign (Sent by Foad Noori)
An Abadani goes into a sandwich shop in Shiraz and asks the attendant Kaa
shalvar daari?
The Shirazi says Na kaakou, maa eenja shalvar namifroushim
Becheh Abadan says Kaa peerhan daari?
The Shirazi says Na kaakou, Maa eenja pirhan ham namifroushim.
Abadani says Kaa migom eenja jouraab meefroushi? Shirazi gets angry and says
bandeye khoda sandwich foorousheyeha, Maa eenja labas namifrosheem
Abadani says pas cheraa rou shisheh neveshti Kaalbas (Kaa-lebas) darim.
Haall
Ye Abadaniey ba doostesh raaft party.Abadanee ke mekhaast be doostesh to
party haall bedeeh, Bolaand daad zaad "Becheha,Becheha, eenjaa hechkaas
beGheyr az dooste moo goo nakhoreeh" :)
Gholo Without Rayban ( Sent by Sina
Semsarzadeh)
once an abadanian wakes up,take a shower,brush his teeth,dreeses up
and before going out, he starts looking for his ray ban's you know how
neccesery it is,and he didn't find itthen he goes asking his mother
,nene , nene pass eynak raybanom koo?!!!
nene replys that,nene ghorboonet berom raybanete kokat zad raft.
gholo answers, very loudly pass hala mo goh bezanom be chesham.
Salem (Sent by Bob Dabiri)
An Arab was walking in Tehran, and looking at the buildings not paying
attention to the traffic, and a car hits him and he flies in the air and
lands 10 meters away, the driver jumps out of his car, really worried,
asking him: Salemi? he replies: na volac, Jasemam, Salem babame. :)
Golnavazan (Sent by Albrik
Avananessian)
As they were taking Daruish to jail for his political affiliation,
Golnavazan through himself between Daruish and the savak agents saying
"Ka, ma ro koja meebareen-eh ?"
Tehran Kaabee ( Sent by Albrik
Avananessian)
When late prime minister Hovayda was visiting Abadan he asked Tehran
Kaabee if he was teaching his son Khalaf any farsi (in response to
the mandate to make farsi the main language) in his response Tehran
Kaabi replied yes, then he turned to his son and said "Khalaf be
amoo begoo choonee"
Golnavazan2
Golnavazan was caught by the police and while they were taking him to
police station, he screamed " First was Golesorkhe, Second
Gorbachoof and now is my turn".
Kaa (Sent by Sina Semsarzadeh)
ye bar ye abadani mikhast baradareshe be bacheha moaarefi kone
vaghti ke be bacheha residan goft, kaa bacheha, bacheha kaa
Pashe (Sent by Sina Semsarzadeh)
Ye bar ye pashe'i mishine roo koole ye abadani, va nishesh mizane,
moghe'i ke mikhat bolandshe mige:
Roozi ze sare sang
Oghabi be hava khaast.
Rayban ( Sent by Sina Semsarzadeh)
Ye roozi ye abadani mada'resh be hale ma'rg mariz mishe, Doctor ham
be Gholo mige ke ta 30'000,TN(Price of a RayBan that time) Tahi'ie
nakoni madarete amal nemikonim.
Gholo mire toham ,va ba khodesh dargir mishe, Mire pishe rafighesh
Borzoo sia,va hameie jariane besh mige.va azesh miporse ke:Be nazare to
RayBanome befrooshom ya na'??????????????Borzoo Javab mide :Na',,RayBano
T-shirte sia kheily behet miat.:)
Zayer ( Sent by Salim Semssarzadeh
)
Shah ye bar meere Shadegan ta is medarese shadegan bazjoyee bekone.
Az Zayer khalef meporse"Khob hala ke Inqelabe safeed baraye shoma medrese
dorost kardeh che nazaree dareed"
Zayer was so proud and wanted to say something good. He cleared his throat
and said:
"Ham khobe... Ham khobe ... Bachahamoon meran madrese choone nemeeshan
Kazem ( Sent by Salim Semssarzadeh
)
Ye Baar kazem az shadegan meere tehran. to Tehran poolesh tamoom meeshe.
Telegraph meezene be pederesh wo meege "KAZEM POOL LAZEM". Pederesh javab
meede "MADERET MEREEZ ...KERM NAREEZ"
Bafandege ( Sent by Sina Semssarzadeh
)
Ye bar ye kakoo dashte az baghele Khabgahe ,Jang zadegan rad mishode,
Se nafar nashenas migiren hesabi khoord o khamiresh mikonan.
Kakooe kotak khorde mire Kalantari ke shekaiet kone.
Kakoo:Am,Jenab sarvan, se nafar dame dare Khabgah gereftand hesabi mane
zadan.
Jenab Sarvan:Khoonsard bash,Begoo bebinam.moshakhessate in se nafar chi
bood? Khoonashoon Kojast?Koja kar mikonan?
Kakoo:Am, man hichi namdoonam,faghat midoonam ke too karkhooneie
Bafandegi Kar mikonand.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jenab Sarvan:Mmm.Manzooret chie? chetor fahmidi??!!
Kakoo:Am,mogheii ke dashtand mane mizadan,yekishoon be dovomi goft;
GHOLO, BEBAFESH, GHOLO BEBAFESH.
Monom ( Sent by s.alian )
yek rooz ye abadani mikhaste bere tehran ,behesh meegan agar rafti khooneh
kessi dar zadi goftand kee-ye nagoo monom begoo manam, abadani migeh "ageh
darro was kardan deedan monom chee?"
Karte Aroosi ( Sent by s.alian )
Ye rooz ye abadani yek karte aroosi to koocheh payda mikooneh, be address
negah mikoneh va mireh be mahal aroosi, dar rah aroosi chand ta as
bacheha ra
mibineh, behesh migan koja miri, migeh mou daroom miroom aroosi, becheha
migan manam bebar, abadani migeh voolek berim, miran khaneh taraf ra payda
mikonan, dar mizanan, saheb khoneh miad migeh che, abadani migeh oomedim
aroosi, taraf migeh say inn, aroosi shish saale pish bood, abadani migeh say
mou, mou kart darom, voolek ina chi
Learn English ( Sent by Baback Rigi )
One "Abadanian" guy had just found oil in his backyard and become very
rich, so he send his son to "kharedj" to learn english. when the son
returns after 10 yrs he discovers that the son has not learn a single
english word, becuase all his friend in "kharedj" were other
"abadanians". The father gets very angry, so he kidnapp an american and
locks the guy togheter with his son in a celler, hopping that the son
now must learn english to be able to talk to the other guy.
Another 10 years goes by and he gather all his friends to go see his
son, thinking that he now speaks like an englishman.
They open the celler and the american guy comes out and say:
Voolek salam!
Rising Sun ( Sent By Hamid Solo )
Ye rozi yek khareji sobeh khili zod vared_h abadan misheh .
va mibineh sad_tahi abadani zireh yek drakhte jam shodh_and va yek abadani
digar balaieh drakht rafte .
va har chand daghigheh(minute) abadanihaie zir drakhte dad mizanan va az
balaii miporsand DAR_OMAD,va balahii migeh NA .
va baz pas as chan daghigheh digar miporsidand DAR_OMAD va taraf migeh NA
va.........
va in car adameh dasht ta khareji taghatash sar mireh va az yeki az abadaniha
miporseh momkeneh be man begin,
shoma montezereh chi hastid ke dar biad ?
va taraf goft ma montezereh korshidim(sun) ke dar biad va mikhahim
RAYBAB_haieman ra bezanim !!!!
First Timers ( Sent By Mobish )
There was a abadani and a rashti and a turk who were going to be executed.
the R and the T shaked as #¤&#¤ . Suddenly the Abadani turns his face to
them and says:
KAA...... BARE AVALETONE.
Nahang ( Sent By Mobish )
once many KAAS swimed in the ocean( SHATT ) . Suddenly a shark came by and
ate one of our HOMIES. The others swam bravely from there. Abod said: oh my
god, the shark ate Jasem up.Then the shark put his head up from the water
and said...
KI KOSAS, MO NAHANGOM.
Kaa in Japan ( Sent By Ali Habibi )
iraniharo az japon dashtan ekhraj mikardan,hamaro jam karde
bodan to forodghah va esmashono mineveshtan ke biron bendazan,az yeki
miporsan esmet chi ,mighe hasan,japoni ha mighan bendazish biron,az on
yeki miporsan esme to chi hastesh mighe ali ,mighan to ham boro biron,va
hamchenin.
be abadanie miresan mighan esme to chi???Abadanie mighe KAKO CHI MO????
be on mighan to mitoni bemoni:))
Tehran Kaabi ( Sent By Seyed Mohammadi )
Bechaheye Tehran Kaabi hamash gerye mekardan ke hame telefision daran
bejoz ma. Tehran-Kaabi asabanee shod raft ghafase morgha (kitchen cage)
ra avord gozasht vasat otagh goft felann barname Raze-Bagha ro bebyneed
ta baadan.
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