I've Got It...Bad!
source: questionnaire taken from an email I was asked to fill out'

Name: confidential hehe... :=)

Age: 32

Your nicknames for him:hmm...when Im being silly its huni glazed buns or sweet cheeks of joy and he hates for me to call him that LOL but usually just bebe cakes
Where is he from: same place I am, Buffalo,NY but he's currently residing in Manhattan

Offspring: 1-our son hehe

Occupation: He's very much into computers and thats what he does software stuff...but his job might go out of business :-( He also is very much into music and does his own music to the side...

What kind of music does he listen to: Well...he's never confirms to what society thinks is good...he is very much an individualistic person...he listens to music that prolly you will never hear about...he mostly listens to underground rock music...sometimes soul music...and Im not talkin R&B but soul music like Sade,D'Angelo,Lauyrn Hill...etc. He also listens to different spanish music(ny style) alot too sometimes and every now and then old school hip hop...but thats about it.

Is he a man of sports: no he wants nothing to do with sports...lol

Pet(s): lol..he has this little small bunny looking thing..it comes from South America..its called a chinchilla...and I named it chillo. Hes a mess too lol very bad thats why he's always in his cage...but he loves his chillo..he's always sayin thats his baby boy lol...

Do you know his friends:Well...he has 12 good friends...he said..I think that is so many...I guess cuz he is a guy though lol and all his friends are such nice mannerable,real cool cats, laidback,not caught up in pop american culture, they jus do their own thing but they are good peoples, type guys but they are weird but in a good sense...they arent insane weird but they just do their own thing and dont confirm to society with their likes/dislikes..they are a very unique,interesting bunch I must say

Do you know his best friend: YES LOL very well...cuz Im his daughter...but now he tells me he doesnt have any best friends just good friends...he told me as you get older you just have good friends not best friends...according to him that is...

How would u rate his looks(honestly):He's like a 5.6

How would u rate his personality: He's very complex to understand...Ive never met anyone like him before, hes very interesting and cool, I bet your wondering why deal with that? but...something about what he said and how he felt about things really attracted me to him and made me so interested to hear more...he 110% respects women...not just me because Im his girl but all women and I sooo LOVE that,he's very silly at times lol and has a big heart and he's very respectable to everyone...and he's so honest with me and he understands me and I understand him, I love that too...he will let me know everything! yes everything...lol and he makes me laugh all the time..we are so on the same page about life, jokes and love and maturity level...and thats so cool to me...

Where did you guys meet:lol...well Ive been knowing him for many years but we first officially started seeing each other in winter of 98'

Do you know of his previous love interest: Well...he's a 32 year old man so he's talked to a lot of women...and he will tell me about any of them as Ive asked about nearly 90% of them. But he's only been in love twice besides me...along time ago.

Does he get along with his parents: His parents are a classic New York italian family...they are very into their culture and dont believe in interracial relationships. He is so open to interracial dating...he prefers to black,mixed and spanish women because he is attracted to them so much more. He has only been with one white woman and it wasnt a relationship,hint. They also give him a very hard time on not being married yet too.  He does love them ofcourse but they arent close but they check on each other often. He is close to his 18 yr old brother. (He has 1 bro. and 1 younger sister,16 y/o).They just beat down on him sometimes...then other times they are being very loving parents to him. They also kicked him out when he was 17 for being in love with a spanish girl and smoking weed. He doesnt do any drugs or smoke weed anymore. I asked him why he doesnt smoke anymore? He said because it makes him lazy and not want to do anything and thats not what kind of person he wanna be. Hes very honest with me...He tells me it like it is...sometimes it hurts but Im glad he's being honest.

Whats the sweetest thing he has did for you: Well if I really need something and he can help me out he will...but I guess the "sweetest" would be...just simple things...like he always says he loves my voice or how I say certain words, or when he told me Im his best friend...or the time when I came over and I was feeling a little stressed and he listened to me as always (another thing I love bout him...he's a good listener...never forgets anything I say) then he gave hugged me and kissed me and told me I was a tough cookie and I can get past this, just do the right things because life isnt always what it seems, just stay the good hearted person you are. Then we both ended up laughing at this inside joke we had about the word "horny". Then he kissed me really nicely and passionately. I hate it when people dont take their time and he always takes his time kissing. Then he takes all my clothes off and massages my whole body with his tongue even my toes lol. Then he told me he wanted me to cum alot lol. Thats like his goal everytime...he gets all worried if he cant do that. So afterwards I thought he was going to take his clothes off but he said no...he was just wanting to make you feel good. Then he was like if you want to though. Then I was like I was just asking. He's like if I do something for you then I just do something for you, Im not looking for anything in return. Even when we do have sex, he only wanna do what pleases me. But I like to do what pleases him too. He only has 2 request, of one which I will fulfill lol...he just ask that I give him a good massage job and to down that stuff. I will only do the first one because I think the 2nd one is kinda gross personally lol. Ive always heard if you do that for your man he will love you lol...but he doesnt care what any man has to say about men,he is so "himself" about things and such a real man about things. I tried it once and neva again. yuck! lol...

Describe him in 2 words: weird but in a good,interesting,cool mysterious way and sweetheart

Last thing you guys argued about: That he's been too busy for me....lol but we have talked that over already...

Ever caught him cheating: Well he is a single man in nyc and Im in Texas...so Im not going sit here stupid and say no. But he is so honest with me...he will tell me everything and anything I want to know. He tells me who he has sex with. He told me he's tired of just fucking because he wants to be with me or find someone for him because he thinks he is old which he is not. He also said the girls want more out of it and he's not feeling them so he doesnt. I say if the girl is gonna lay stupid, then she is going to lay stupid because a man is going to be a man ya know. But he is nice to them he doesnt treat them like they are nothing. We have a little problem besides the long distance relationship too kinda...lol. He happens to be my dads close friend like a brother. We accidentally fell for each other because we were spending so much time together...the last time I was in New York. I felt sorry for him because I knew he grew up poor and got picked on alot and his parents were so hard on him for liking spanish and black girls. So I felt this thing for him...also he was very cool,sweet and shy lol. I thought it was so cute that he was shy somewhat...rather than the annoying cocky guys who try to approach me. So one nite we were chillin in the house alone...at nite and we were joking around and he was single/lonely and kinda in his women chasing phase still (which he isnt now). So he kinda gave me the eye...then he didnt..I guess he was like what am I thinking, this is like my niece almost but he was thinking with the other brain I think and this was after going out drinking too. The weather was bad and flickering the lights on and off occasionally. We were gonna leave and go to where my das was so I could get my key to the house to give him his gloves. Then he kinda gave me that stare as we were going to walk to the front door and it was so cold outside and he hugged me because it was so cold you just dont understand lol...I had to close the door back because the wind was blowing making it worse. Then we looked at each other and next thing I knew his tongue was down my throat. Things just went further until it ended up we were on the couch at it. Then we didnt talk about it much for awhile because it wasnt suppose to happen since he's my dads friend like a brother and he was so much older and my oldest daughters dad was trying to get back into me and my daughters life...but he had some drama going on at home because his family is crazy and he was saying he wanted to do something besides hangin out, he was gettin tired of the ghetto but he loved his ghetto people but tired of being oppressed and seeing his oppressed people...he just wished things were different but he know things wont change much. I think he got this way after my mom invited his family over our house to eat and he came over nearly every Sunday to eat with us...then when we moved back to Buffalo before coming to Texas...he wanted to come stay with us. My family didnt like that...but he promised to work and contribute to the bills and provide for our daughter and I would never have to and how he wanted to be in a church home,and get away from his neighborhood,and he would sleep on the couch,etc. I couldnt believe he said all that. I would of bet money, he didnt say it if I didnt have such proof lol cuz I thought I knew him so well but I guess people can change. I think opening him up new exposures on life changed him into having dreams now cuz my family talks to him and I dont think nobody ever talked to him before. So anyways...he was staying with us for a few months until we started getting into it too much. I was still kinda young then about relationships...so he worked 12 hours a day and did provide for our kid but I had just had my 2nd kid who was not even 4 months yet and not his child but he was good to her though. Anyways...me and my dads friend messed around a few other times then we decided we better stop because what we were risking was not worth it and it use to be a friendship but was turning into just fucking and we both didnt want that. So we stopped...and he told me he felt so dirty because of it but I told him not to because its not like he made me do anything but we did remain friends and talk alot more even after this happened. Then we moved to Texas...and my oldest daugher's dad came with us. I didnt think he would want to leave to go to Texas but I was wrong. Thats when things got even worse for us. While he stayed with us in Buffalo, we never even talked much because the more I got to know Chris and my pal ole' pal Anthony hehe *cheese* the less I was interested in making things work out with him, not to be selfish because I was very open minded in trying, but he still wanted to do his old things like hang out all nite, drink, smoke and just talk to me when he wanted sex. If I would try to sit and talk to him he would be like man you gonna have to girl talk with yo girlfriends not me and walk away or Id try to spend time with him and he would just wanna have sex. So we couldnt spend time together, we couldnt talk, or if I told him something I liked..he'd be like I dont fuckin care...damn shut up. We were like oil and water...because he never had a father or real man in his life and he never really had a mother or prime example female in his personal life either but like every now and then we would get along just fine for like a few days then we were back to not talking again for a couple of days...same cycle all the time with us. We did go out to eat and took our daughter (who was 2) along at my moms request. When we did go out...he wouldnt say nothing, just being really quiet. So it just really sucked...Then I let our kid sleep with him one nite on a mattress on the living room floor and he brought her back in my room at 2am saying he couldnt handle it no more...cuz he had to put her to bed and then she woke up cryin at 2am and he just brought her to me and walked out and I was sleep. He would never even try to do nothing but hold her or play with her...he wouldnt do nothing else. He use to make me mad about that...so I made him feed her one day and it was the principle...I didnt really trust him caring for her, not that he would do something bad cuz I knew he loved her but he just was kinda clueless about it. But it is his child too...he's one of those guys who thinks the woman should do everything. So I made him feed her and she was cryin and spittin everything out cuz he didnt make it small enough for her and she was hungry and use to me talkin sweet to her while she eats and he was like sayin it all manly in a deep voice and it was scaring her lol..she wasnt use to that. Cuz I was spying on him and then he decided to eat it right infront of her face and she tried to open his mouth and get it but he wouldnt let her...so he gave her some and she finally started eating. Then she made a huge mess and then she started throwing her food when she was finished and cryin cuz she was sleepy. He didnt know what to do...he just started feeding her more and she kept spittin it out and fighting him to get away. Then I came in because she was choking on her food cuz she was crying too. He started fussin at me saying I know what to do and he doesnt. But after that...he never tried to do much with her besides kiss and play with her. Then he would stay out so late in the streets sometimes...then come home with that weed smell on him and beer on his breath and try to have sex with me. Claiming he was working 12 hrs...I think he was working like 6 hrs a day and hustling and hangin out all nite the rest. His sex was so bad...He just wanted straight sex, no kissing, no going down on me...nothing passionate just him getting off then its over. He was very possessive too. He was so jealous of everything I did and didnt want any guys near me. One time he got mad because some guy from my school kept calling and walking me home from school. He thought we were together but we werent. I was only with my dads friend from those times and thats it since being with my younger daughters dad, besides being with my oldest kids dad. (that was a mouthful huh lol) He thought I was lie'n but I wasnt...so it ended up into something physical. That was the last time that happened. I totally hated his guts after that...I lost everything for him. I knew he was a thug...so I knew how to deal with him and I knew his game...and I put things aside about him to give him chances but he blew all of them. The problem was he wasnt ready to be a father, or be a real man towards me, and I was still young and we didnt communicate or know each other like we should of. So then we stopped speaking, stop having sex, just cut each other off basically. He started hanging out less at the house and I think he was talking to other girls now. It got to the point where it was time for him to go back where he came from cuz he was just too much to deal with for me. My family knew very little about the problems we were having until I said I wanted him to go back. There were like 2 incidents were my family heard us arguing but thats all the evidence they had really. He would keep it under their nose on the low. Then he went back to nyc because it got to the point where we were always arguing and arguing in front of my kids. My mother was always at work...my sister didnt stay there but she was there alot on the weekends with her kids. So the next thing I knew...I was so sick for a whole week and I thought I had the flu but something told me to take a pregnancy test and I did and it said no...but there were 2 test inside. So I hid it and I was going to re-test in another week, because when your first pregnant, a pregnancy test usually wont show up until you are like 1-2 months pregnant. So I decided to test a week later and it was positive. I was very mad at him because I didnt want to be pregnant and didnt want anything to do with him. I was going to have an abortion but I didnt. From a source in our family, I was told that I was suppose to be an abortion because my parents were trying to get more established financially before having another child. Anyways I had the baby and it was a little boy. The most sweetest, happiest little boy Ive ever known. He loves to be pampered with love. When he was about 2 years old...he started looking exactly like my dads friend. Nobody else notice this because who would of thought that, ya know. But he looked just like him. I knew who his father was...it was my dads friend. I didnt know what to do. I tried to gently tell my dads friend and it freaked him out really bad...we didnt talk for weeks. I think he needed time to himself for a minute because he didnt want any kids unless he was married then for his kid to be mine. So all I could do was email him everyday almost, which I did. I knew he would read them because he always listens to me. He knows Im not just talking out my ass and I have something to say and I do love him and care for him and I think the same of him. So finally I get to talk to him again...and he just wanted to ask me some questions and then he got so hurt/upset that he didnt wanna talk anymore and hard as it was...I respected it. So we hide it from everybody until we got to be together and talk it over. So we got this chance over the summer...we through some miracle..spent time together overseas for the entire summer. It was nice but be away like that together but I just missed home, there's no place like home...and being around your people when you want to,etc. There's only a limited time you can spend away from home...but I was so glad we got to talk things over and stuff. But my family still did not know. Eventually...they did find out. They took it very hard and I think he took it even harder...because we are the only family he has. His family doesnt talk and he's not close with his parents either. Now...they just remember that we have a son together and how much we both love him and we (family) just dont bring it up and leave it as that. It is just going to take time...thats all I can tell them to understand that he is so beautiful to me inside and out and he wasnt just using me. I know at first...we did mess around but it turned out into something very beautiful, ironically enough I can say. I knew he was a good person before we ever messed around though...but I didnt know it would end up with us being so in love..... Believe it or not, thats a summary of everything. Im such a different person now. My game has changed, but my name is still the same, ya feel me. Im a grown woman now, facing new things and growing each day.

Do you guys argue alot: Well...sometimes we do argue. I know he's dealing with his anger about his parents still and his job that might go out of business (I pray they dont) and our  little drama sometimes gets to him but he always apologizes when it does. We argue when hes too busy for me and I never give him that answer but I bite my tongue about it most of the time...or he's feeling stressed and it puts him in a crappy mood. But we never stay not talkin for more than 3 days LOL

What are his pet peeves about you and women: To start off his preference is spanish woman and he also likes black women, nice sweet girls, feminine ladies, affectionate and he hates it when girls smoke,drink,berp or fart...or on his heels before he loves them. Me- that I call him so much (but I can explain) He's very busy working on webpage things and also I dont want to crowd him since Im in Texas and also...we could never be together although I have mad love for him and he has mad love for me...its easy to explain it in saying we are in love but truly we just have a special thing for each other. He's told me he wanted to marry me. One time I was joking and asking him was he gonna marry Jennifer Lopez since he said thats his wife. I said well you have to marry her before you can say that...then he goes shes my fantasy but I want to marry you. He jokes around a lot but I know when he's joking and when he's not...and he wasnt joking. But no we arent getting married. He loves to hear from me and see how I am doing...but he just doesnt like for me to call every single day and talk for hours like we tend to do. I am so for him finding a woman and falling in love with her. I want whats best for him and I want him to be happy. He's been with his share of women and he's not falling for any woman except for the one who makes him fall in love and has the qualities he's attracted to. He said he likes affectionate, smart,down2earth nice girls who are trying to do something with their life and who do not smoke,drink or bitch alot...and like to dress feminine and are at least cute and have things in common with him. We had a heart2heart talk about this and I loved it...he's such a wonderful,interesting man. I love hearing him talk..he's so funny, intelligent, open minded and very loving. I was asking him questions to see how he views women and music. He just blows my mind...he has such beautiful answers and hes so very honest with me. He will answer any question honestly. I ask him about the women in his currently life if any, and he will tell me everything. He knows we are not having sex anymore or anything...and he's cool with that. But there is sorta one thing...he doesnt care to hear about me and any guys...so I dont tell him and he doesnt ask...but Im always digging into his life and business and he doesnt mind. I love that we always can laugh about things...we can never talk without getting a good laugh that we both need. Im not having sex with any guys and there is no one in particular in my life right now.

Have you seen any changes since you met: YES...he's always had it in him...he always was a good person and laidback,smart and silly but he was kinda on his women chase still when we first met. The first year we actually started talking, he just regarded me as being "young" and he didnt respect me as much (not that he treated me bad but he just labeled everything I did with my age compared to his age...ya know) So sometimes I spoke up about that...he was right like 25% of the time. He didnt think of me as immature but just as I still had room for growing,learning and knowing things. I also changed him in some sense. It took me 2 years to do it and I didnt notice I was doing it until like a year after we started talking. I changed his thoughts on his woman chasing. He doesnt do that anymore. After several of my counsels I made him listen to...it finally got through. He's never disrespected women...but he just was so after sex all the time, everytime.  Now he doesnt want that. He wants to date to get to know them and see if he likes them...not to just date to get in their pants. He so desperately wants to be in a relationship but he's not forcing anything though if its there its there, if not its not...but he wants someone in his life. He is more willing to talk to...before he never wanted to talk much. He just wasnt feeling hearing a buncha female talk...but after listening to me he found out new things on life, and that I was one of the nicest, most affectionate, sweetest, coolest females hes ever known...he says.
Hes so different now. He dates women and doesnt have sex with them...he had this chinese girl spend the nite before and they didnt have sex. He tells me everything...even if he has sex, he tells me. He doesnt have sex as often as he use to also. He also hates strips clubs. Thats the other thing Ive held from him besides telling him about guys is that I for a very short time, when I was kinda lost/young stripped. I joked around one day and said I was gonna be a stripper. He said you do and Ima beat your ass. Not that he hits women but sometimes he does get a temper if forced to, like when this puerto rican girl was obsessed with me and he didnt even like her. She stalked him for like 2 days too and almost got arrested. Anyways...I go why dont you want me to strip?? (just seeing why, not that I was ever going to strip again, never.) Then he goes...because baby your so much better than that and you lose a part of you that I dont think you can ever gain back. He was just like dont ever do that okay. I said yeh most of those girls who do that end up hating men and turning gay alot or totally losing theirself. He agreed and told me of this black stripper girl he knew once...and she stripped in midtown Manhattan and made lots of money but all the horrible stories she told him that happened to her...he said she got all into her job and got breast implants,etc. He hates breast implants and anything not birth given, except a weave..hes down with that if its woren nicely. He was like baby thats the most horrible job for you to have, dont ever think about doing it. I didnt wanna tell him I had did it before...maybe I would of if he didnt tell me how much it bothers him. I didnt want to hurt him. I know he use to go to strip clubs but he said its so wack to him now...seeing girls sell their bodies to strangers and the girls treat the men like numbers...and the men treat the women like shit. He said he just dont wanna see none of that. Yes..it took me 2 years to change him and he's the only man Ive changed...and I dont plan on changing another man lol...but if it happens it happens. Ohh..maybe I did change another guy in another way, hehe..*wink* you know who u are :-) {Ant} but not in such the same sense...hehe.

Describe him in bed:lol...well we dont have sex anymore but it was very good lol. Ive never been in love with someone and they were in love with me and we had sex...until him. He just wants to do whatever I want thats it. He wants to satisfy me on every move of it. He does everything really passionately and affectionately whether its fast,slow,soft,ruff,whatever...and his favorite position is going down on me...seriously lol...

One thing you wish he would do less of: He's very sensitive...its good but then he's so sensitive. He will bring it to me...sometimes but I cant bring it back to him...cuz hes so sensitive...and he has his days alot...I can see past it so I just let him have his day and try to email him and let him know Im there and I care...even though he wont tell me whats going on...I do respect his space now and his privacy...although we are very close..I think everyone is entitled to some kind of personal self privacy...I love him, trust his heart, and wish the best for him...so I do openly acknowledge his privacy as privacy

What are his beliefs on the recent tragedy: He's sadden by what happened with the planes...and he doesnt think anyone should stop living because of it..he said it means we should just be more God loving/fearing..and understand why they are so upset with the US...learn what the cause is before we jump to conclusions...which I totally agree on...and learn to view the media as a filter and not just take in everything as ALL but take it in as a filter of reality...because they can make things seem far better or worse than they really are...they have the power to sensationalize and do anything to grab viewers attention...thats a huge part of their job...you gotta understand...

Last but not least, would you say he "knows" you very well: Yes...he knows me very well..one of the 2 people in this world who do...and thats so special to me :-)