The Official Mime Homepage: REAL ULTIMATE MIMING

The Official Mime Webpage

Real Ultimate Miming

Hi, this site is all about mimes, REAL MIMES. This site is awesome. My name is Chris and I can't stop thinking about mimes. These guys are cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet.

Facts:

1. Mimes are mammals.

2. Mimes pretend to be stuff ALL the time.

3. The purpose of the mime is to pretend to be stuff and get killed.

Weapons and gear:

Silence A Unitard

The unrelenting hatred of the masses

Testimonial:

Mimes can pretend to be anyone they want! Mimes get killed ALL the time and don't even think twice about it. These guys are so crazy and awesome that they pretend to be stuff ALL the time. I heard that there was this mime who was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon the mime pretended to pick it up for the whole town. My friend Bob said that he saw a mime totally pretend to be some kid just because the kid opened a window.

And that's what I call REAL Ultimate Miming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don't believe that mimes have REAL Ultimate Miming you better get a life right now or I will chop your head off!!! It's an easy choice, if you ask me.

Mimes are sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants. I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart. These guys are totally awesome and that's a fact. Mimes are fast, black, white, silent, powerful, and sweet. I can't wait to start miming for the Lord next year. I love mimes with all of my body (including my vagina).

Q and A:.

Q: Why is everyone so obsessed about mimes?

A: Mimes are the ultimate paradox. On the one hand they pretend to be holding an apple, but on the other hand, mimes pretend to be holding another apple.

Q: I heard that mimes are always cruel or mean. What's their problem?

A: Whoever told you that is a total liar. Just like other mammals, mimes can be dangerous OR totally violent.

Q: What do mimes do when they're not pretending to be stuff or getting killed?

A: Most of their free time is spent pretending to be trapped, but sometime they pretend to climb ropes. (Ask Bob if you don't believe me.)

This is a picture of my best friend Bob showing off.

He's a lot older than me and almost done with life,

which is bragable.