Epic Battles 4
Topic: Epic Battles
Welcome back to epic battles!

On this episode, you will get see me fighting against Doucheman the Great, on the first fight in the heaven, yeah, tournament.

ME VS. DOUCHEMAN THE GREAT

ROUND ONE
Well, even before this battle started I knew Doucheman the Great would be a formidable foe, but not as much as he was. he had me guessing throughout the whole the battle. At the beginning I was beating him. But that quickly changed right after he pulled one of his best moves out of his sleeve, "Super Douche Rape!" This one was hard to escape, seeing as how Doucheman the Great was a seventeenth-time rapist, and he really knew what he was doing. I mean really knew... yeah... anyway I had to find a way to block it, then I realized that Douchebags don't like socks. I don't know why, but they just don't. So I took of my shoes then one of my socks, and used as a shield to block that horrible attack. It worked. COCKBLOCKED!

ME: 100% DOUCHEMAN THE GREAT: 100%

ROUND TWO:
Wow. This was an eventful round. Little did I know about Doucheman the Great's secret transformation. Yes. I said it. Secret transformation. Wanna hear more about it. Try reading on... it was not too hard to block Doucheman's attacks at the beginning, but it wasn't easy, it was about medium. Maybe a little below, or maybe a little above. I don't know. After about three tries of his "Super Douche Rape!" attack, he decided it was time for a change, a transforchange...

to be continued...

Epic Battle -Interlude-
Mood:  energetic
Now Playing: Hernia
Topic: Epic Battles
IT'S TIME FOR EPIC BATTLES!

But first let me explain how I am able to fight again if in the last episode I died. Well, I not actually fighting in the real world I'm fighting in ...Heaven... yeah, Heaven for a chance to go back to the real world. THAT'S THE GRAND PRIZE!!

TO THE BAT MOBILE!!!!!

Well in this little bracket style tournament we have 8 contestants and this is how its gonna be bitch:

ME(mmcambells)------|
|---
DOUCHEMAN THE GREAT-|

MICHAEL JACKSON-----|
|---
A LITTLE BOY--------|

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE---|
|---
J.C. CHAZE----------|

SADAME HUISANE------|
|---
ADOLPH HITLER-------|

Yes. As you can see this is a fair match for all... except me. Also I would like to give props to sat-...god who organized this. Looks like I'm actually have to thank GOD. Yeah...............




you suck.

Epic Battles 3 PART TWO
Mood:  cheeky
Now Playing: Whorpions
Topic: Epic Battles
continued....

ME: 80% TURDMAN: 100%

ROUND TWO:
Due to the thirty-minute rest in between each of the three-minute rounds, I had a chance to recover from the turd. I also had a plan. Yes. I was the man with the plan. And I used it. Yes. So since Turdman was a man made out of turds, maybe he would have the same weakness turds have too. Well I decided to see if it was true. I took out my Antibac spray. Then the round started. He begin to throw turds at me at an alarming turd rate. TOO FAST BRO! I didn't know how to make it through the good smelling barrage of turds, so I out my Antibac, and ran to Turdman while spraying away. What this acclompished was making the turds smell great before they hit me, also some of it hit st killed me like that, they made nearly knocked out, and I could barely tink. But I could tink about thing, and for some mysterious reason it was Denzel Washington's speech in Remember the Titan's. It was a nice speech, and shortly after, I died.

ME: 0% TURDMAN: 99%

STAY TUNED TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!

Epic Battles 3 PART ONE
Mood:  accident prone
Now Playing: Whorpions
Topic: Epic Battles
today on Epic Battles...

ME Vs. Turdman

From the streets of Turd City, Turdman is a little old hobo. Born in the sewers, Raised in the alleys, turdman was a veery formiddable foe.

ROUND ONE:
Hmmm... an epic battle indeed. Me versus Turdman is the kind of battle that could last forever if not for my great wisdom in the art of poo. It started and Turdman was the first one to attack. He threw a turd at me. I dodged it, though some of it hit the pavement around me and that hit me. I wanted to punch him, but if I did, I knew I would get dirty. So I planned, but I couldn't just plan uninterupted. No. Turdman had to interupt me. OR did he? Yes he did. After many throwings of turds he finally hit me, and knocked me down. Down for the count. But right before he I fell, I could hear the bell ring for the Second Round... I DON'T MIND CAUSE I'M SAVED BY THE BELL!

Epic Battle 2
Mood:  mischievious
Now Playing: Great Height
Topic: Epic Battles
Today on Epic battles......

ME Vs. J00

ROUND ONE:
It starts with a bang. We both deliver blow to each other. Haha, blows. Joor blows are stronger, but mine hit more often. It makes us a even-stevens match. Half way through the round I whip out my big GUNS. Not so even-stevens now, eh? Yes. As I'm about to shoot, Joo whips out his/hers GIANT GUMS; and trys to chomp me at full-chomping speed. And with the big mouth that Joo have, it would've hurt. would've. would have..... wood halve.

ME: 70% J00: 70%

ROUND TWO:
...wood halve. But I delivered a smashing blow to Joor jaw. It permanetely damages your mouth. IT hurts too. My big guns start a blazin' again. a blazin' on Joor face! After 6,998 strikes from Deez Guns, J00 die.

ME: 70% J00: 0%


TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR MORE COOLNEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS...

An eic battle pic.
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Great Height
Topic: Epic Battles
Here's a cool pic of me against Jerry Curls XVIII.

I know you love how I am beating him so bad.

MY EPIC BATTLES -PART ONE-
Now Playing: Great Height
Topic: Epic Battles
TODAY THE BATTLE WAS.........

ME Vs. SPIDERMAN

Round One:
When we started we were just staring at each other, no one making a move..... I was making a plan. I knew he was too. I stepped. He stepped. I jumped. He jumped. I farted. He smelled. I died a little inside. He died a little inside.

Before he noticed, I got out my GIANT Death Ray and shot him through the stomache. He fell. i was about to go in for the kill when I heard the bell. The round was over.

ME: 100% SPIDERMAN: 2%

Round Two:

We started, I immediately shot him again. He died and I WON.




The end of today's battle is now came. Stay tuned for more ACTION-PACKED ACTION!