Dag The Giblets
Mood:  lyrical
Now Playing: Whorpions
Topic: Short Stories
Dag the giblets


This is the story of a man named Dag. He did some really important things in his life, which we won’t highlight on in this story. But his life was at the most a classic routine of fanburgers in the dusk before this happened to him.

Today was like any other day for ol’ cherry pants Dag. He did all his normal things and went to his normal job where he engaged at what most people would call normal activities, but Dag always like to spice up the day and call them “whoremal activities“. But what happened after the job was the scary part. ENTER NIGHT! Spookiness commences.
When he got home form work it was time for his mostly anticipated morning dump. He went straight to the bathroom… of love!
He crapped it out, very easily in fact, which was weird, because the day before that he had some cheesy grilled cheese sammichers which were grilled in more cheese. Mmm… sammichers.
Anyway, to get on with the story, he knew that something was wrong, it should have taken him an hour to shit that out, not a minute. So he wiped and wiped…. And ate- I mean wiped. Then he looked in the toilet to see what popped out. What he saw would amaze him for years to come. It was not a jesus-shaped turd like you thought it was going to be from the beginning. No, in his toilet was the most frightening thing on earth… it was a little man, no more than three inches in height, and it opened its little mouth and said to him, “Hey, I’m Giblets, care to flush me down please?”
“WHAT!” replied Dag, for what this tiny Giblets character was speaking was not correst English. “You have horrible grammar skills, and that outfit is tacky,” Dag paused, “And I never except bad English.”
Right before Dag flushed Giblets down to turd Heaven, Giblets said one more thing: “Baby when I see you smile.”

THE END