Why Oatmeal?

The first in a two part documentary concerning the imposter and why we all feel the need for breakfast.

Yes, after moths..err...uh...weeks of suspense, the Imposter stepped forward, and took responsibility for her actions. At this point, we ask ourselves...why? I will attempt to explain her reasons in this, Part 1, of my two part documentery, as well as why each of us feel the need to be someone else.
The warning signals had been coming fo years. Everyone knew that there was something wring with this Horan girl, but no one could quite put their finger on it. It all started around the 25th of February in front of a small computer screen. The world watched, horrified, as a person who would later come to be known as the imposter placed his/her first message. It looked like this:

Yes, it shocked us all. We were not sure what to think. Was Chris really capable of writing this? Opinions were mixed. Many knew that this was not Chris. Others thought it was Chris playing a mean sarcastic prank. Still others, thought that perhaps Chris had had a change fo heart. Many did not know what to think. Our opnions were confirmed, however, when Chris replied stating that the previous entry was not him. We all breathed a sigh of relief, but the question still remained: Who was this imposter.
Perhaps that was the wrong question. Maybe we should have asked ourselves: Why was the imposter? Yes, that's right, why? We now know that Lisa's impostership was brought along due to continuous beatings she recieved from her sister, Katie, who mascarades in the day as a nice Christian, but is actually a hardened criminal. Do not get me wrong, I do not justify anything she did, but I must say that I can see where she was coming from. This impostership was a cry for help--a way to escape the hectic world she lived in.
This is the end of Part 1. Tune in to Part 2, titled "Woodchucks Strike Back."

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