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Rita's Testimony

Introduction

How in the world could someone like me get into such a mess? Strong Christian young lady like myself - pregnant and not married. Not just regular pregnant either but, pregnant with a biracial child!

Background

I was raised in a devout Southern Baptist home. "Saved" at age nine. Started playing the piano and singing in church by about the age of 12. At age 18, I began serving as church musician at various churches. Never in trouble, no drinking, dances, sex - I was pure as the "undriven snow". I attended a prominent "christian" university; sang with a local contemporary Christian group; served as a summer missionary in Indiana and was a youth minister. So what happened?

Wrong Turn

In the midst of all this perfect picture was a season of change that I did not see coming. There came a time that I was idle in the ministry. I sought out a church home. In doing so I did not please my parents with my choice of churches. As I look back, I realize that was such a simple test, but it was the beginning of my unraveling. I truly believe it was God's Will for me to become a part of this particular church but, due to the struggle with my parents I rebelled! "I just won't go to church at all!" Within six months I had given away my virginity, began going to clubs, drinking, dating ungodly men and boom -- I was pregnant by my black boyfriend.

Broken

Needless to say, I hurt and disappointed many people, especially my parents. I think they could have overcome the pregnancy with a marriage liscence (I wasn't the first young lady in our church to get pregnant "out-of-wedlock".) The race issue was a whole 'nother thing!!

It was a tough situation for everyone. Pressure was great on all sides. My relationship with my boyfriend was the first thing to colapse. Then the ultimatum given by my family - us or this baby.

I signed adoption papers the day after her birth - the ache was horrible in my heart. I began to pray and seek God on this matter. I know He heard my prayer for I spent most of the months of my pregnancy repenting for my sins and disobedience.

I listened to my Carman tapes constantly while in the hospital. One of his songs broke through to me - "You're Desire is the Confirmation for what God has for You!"

Yes!! My desire was to keep this precious child. But in keeping her I could lose my whole family. I asked for peace and He gave it. He also said, "If you raise this child to be a Godly young lady I Promise you will have Victory!" So meet Promise Victoria.

I did it. I was so excited with God's words in the hospital, but as soon as we started our life together I felt so alone. Now I wonder how I could have been so dumb and not trust God. He had us in His hands. But my loneliness got me into relationships that added more pain to the rejection I was already carrying around from my parents and her father. I would get involved in different churches, but feeling unworthy, I would always end up at home alone and crying.

Freedom!!!!!

Everything turned around for me in 1995 I rededicated my life and everything was back on track.

Thank you!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my testimony. If it has blessed you please let me know. Also, please pray for me as I follow God's plan for my life.

A special request for prayer - my family (the Frazier's). They still go to church, but have not accepted Promise yet.

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