THE CHURCH OF CHARLTON
WHEN GODDING COUNTS...
Welcome to the Church of Charlton. We find this man to be the living embodiment of God because of his clear establishment of himself as the single most perfect man ever to have existed on earth. Some have come close, and we all can think of a few (Mickey Rooney, Ernest Borgnine, James Brolin); yet these are mere temptations to stray away from the truth that is Heston.
We love Charlton enough to idolize him because...
- He eats cheese.
- He's a republican.
- All of the above.
BULLETS FROM HEAVEN...
IN THE NAME OF HESTON!
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And totally moral.
He loves you almost as much as campaign finance!
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