"Kath, those British people are stapling No Trespassing signs to the trees again."
"We just ripped them down!"
"I know."
"Let's go interview them!"
"Okay."
"And thus it began. One fateful day, in kindergarten, at Leland Academy in Franklin, Mass. Their eyes locked from across the room. In an instant, a friendship was formed. In an instant, all hell broke loose. The early years were turbulent. Paleontologist... or marine biologist? The move from Bellingham to Norfolk, to be closer to Kath. Kath rips her tooth out with a hanger. Elementary school passes in a blur. A quick dance with private school, at Mount Me Now Academy in Rhode Island. Kath and Tiff interview some British people in the woods. A kid yells at them to get off his property. Then came King Philip High School. New people, new experiences. Yet slowly, slowly stabalizing.
"Tiff is the founder of her own self-help franchise, 'You Can't Do It Without Jesus!' As it slowly gains ground and popularity, who is to say what the future has in store? Tiff can be found in her spare time volunteering for Greenpeace and designing exciting underwear. Her message to all the Big Brother readers out there: 'Jesus is always listening. If you need a friend, just look up!'"
