We're in a no junkfood crisis.

The other day I was in the store looking for something extremly harmful (yet tastey) to my body so I won't have to share the planet with you good for nothings. Thats when I relized that we have absolutly no new junkfood out. Whatever happened to Evil scientists out to kill us? Am I the only one left? Meh. I have nothing left to eat except BANANAS these days... and I can hardly remember the last time I had one of those. I don't walk outside in the middle of winter to get fruit, no sir-e bob.

And why arn't shops carring those horribly high in cohlesteral microwavable nachos? What are they thinking? Thats people these days don't care about nachos? Ha! I laugh at your foolishness! By taking nachos off your shelves you've just lost thousands of dollers... all coming from me. I've got money but nothing to spend it on, think I'm going to save it? My ass, saving is for pussies, REAL men spend their money the minute they get it.

And why are Mcdonalds hamburgers getting shitter by the day? Oh right, becuase their work force is made up of immagrants. Still, how much effort does it take to flip a patty and put it on a burger. I could do that, and thats saying something. Hell, who needs Mcdonalds, I'll make my own burgers. I won't settle for that meat in the grocery either, I'll have my own cows and selflishly slaughter them for myself. I always wanted to try that. OK kids, until next time, Everybody except me is stupid.

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