***Subject:the hate mail u requested***--
i currently hate u furthermore i hate u and oh I HATE BLACK NIGGERS AND YOSHI STOP TALKING TO ME
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I know this guy, just ignore him. Thanks, David.
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***Subject : makes no sense***-
this is one of the most useless articles i have ever
read in my 16 year old life ok! you could be writing about features and things that interest people not how to wear a stupid head set i wanna hear u making game cube and ps2 sound like the crap that it is but u don't have to take my advice but this article is so useless i took the time to write this at 2:01 in the morning just to say how useless it is, it just makes me want to take my xbox and throw it at the wall and set it a fire b/c the people who made it made also made this useless article this stupid i would write more about how useless it was but by now u r saying how bad grammar i have but u know take into acknowledgement that this it now at 2:04 am i am pretty tried and to find this useless article on ur website make me wanna run to around screaming what female dogs could write such vulgar insulting lack luster laughable communist terroristic of an article i bet u didn't even read this far b/c u would be the idiot who wrote this article to read my e-mail so far have u been to homestarrunner.com that is so much better than this stupid useless article u need to find sum thing else to write about on ur lack luster web page now go eat a marshmallow b/c ur gonna wanna after i say it cause that always happens and hey look its a killer lobster look out did u know that lobster can regrow a bodily part if removed. (this is the first period i have used) the only exception to a living thing is a virus b/c they reproduce i am a nazi and ur gonna be scared b/c i am so i dont get all the fun around here missy just joking making sure u still reading ok now moving on to better things i am really not a nazi no seriously now this useless article has me typing since 2:01 and it is currently 2:12 do u think their is life in mars of course not u idiot they place is like Afghanistan but 300 degrees hotter. Eskimos are the as useless as this article now that's pretty useless. by the way i eat cheese on Sundays did u pay the people who wrote this cause i would not have how much do u get paid ru single/ well if yes go get sum one instead of sitting around in ur small cubicle reading this do u even get paid or does microsoft just buy slaves u went to college for this? i better good grades and go sum where good so i dont turn out like u reading stupid e-mails fro idiots like me ok i am really not a nazi r u racist cause its the trash like u that ruin this country wats ur race by the way well i hope i get an e-mail back from u and if sum POWERS RANGER WILD FORCE sorry couldn't hold it in have u noticed i have only used one period i am a frugal guy u see "eye for an eye and the whole world goes blind" "hate cannot fight hate only love can do that" well if u care u may e-mail me back but if u dont i will really become a nazi and i know where u live so u better look out and ask ur self do u feel lucky cause i sure dont i want a reply this took me 1/2 an hour, dont u just hate when it starts raining and u dont have an umbrella i cant believe its not butter can u ? wats ur favorite dougnut i like the apple fritters i hope u r a girl cause i would hate to be talking to a guy for this long and so stupidly by the way wahts ur name u better answer all my quetions or sum ones gonne see tweedle dee and tweedle dum and its surely aint gonna be me man me and the guy on the phone really have no life like u sitting there just reading this and so u dont delete this the article was so useless i decided to ask u questions i am very stupid u see wat are u doing on friday hows 8 o'clock sounds ur place or mine sorry to have wasted ur time b/c we know time is money and u might imagine just how much i lost typing this i am on the phone wit this dude for 6:00 hours we are complete dorks scratch that we r just so bored we find this almost completely hilarious but in the end we are probbaly gonna be really scared we sent this but we know we have more authority than a pile of letter openers so y dont u just take that! now if mr bill gates really reads these i love windows thank you you r the bomb this idiot whom is writing this is running 2 xp proffesinals so hahahahahahahahahah u mac user u better not be using a mac to read this u would be an insult to ur own company u work for microsoft and run a mac so i just wanted to say how useless this article is plz respond to me i have no life and 3 kids plz e-mail me plz i got candy lots of it there goes sum of it i told u i had 3 kids this entire e-mail is just to say how useless ur article on how to wear a headset is the end but u know i aint just gonna stop now i am up on my high horse i have been doing this so long i might as well make it an hour i dont even spend this long on hw ur one lucky duck i here only trying to float ur boat a cold one is hardly a cold one at all if it is hot plz dont kill me i support ur company so well dont kill plz i do any thing ill be ur friend ok thank u
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The funny thing about this particular email is that it was originaly directed towards the Xbox people thingys. Now time to criticize it. First off, I'll be damned if this kid gets a passing grade in english. Hardly one puncuation mark... no sir-e-bob. Well after he makes his first comment which was actually on topic (he deserves a biscut for that one) he decides to talk about politics... I think... Oh, oh, homestarrunner.com is a great website... skim throught a couple hundred words... oh, see that part where it says "i am on the phone with this dude?" Yeah, thats me. I'm honored. Oh look at that, computer politics around there... yadda yadda... he's got kids... oh hell. This is the most random thing I've ever read, go make fun of it yourself. I'm going to waste my life on more important stuff.
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***Subject :bush***-
Now i know this is supposed to be hate mail so i will hate some one but not u i am sorry but bush is a dumber dumbass. Ok a little back ground info the public skool systems SUX so does the homeless no really they'll suc ur dick for a buck old people are smelly and he wants to color in our money so it looks like fuckin monopoly money now mr bush i mean dumbass next time u decide to do some thing smart just dont do it at all cause every damn thing uve done has just fucked every ones life up in America at least i know u are smart u did not do any thing to welfare cause u knew ud get ur little wrinkly white ass kicked butt kicked by the NIGGERS who used the welfare and people who need it like the homeless cant get it oh well i want a kitty a pretty kitty not a not so pretty kitty a truly pretty kitty and not a not so not so pretty kitty beause that would be not so pretty kitty so make sure its a pretty kitty that is not not so not pretty and happens to be pretty howard ryhms with coward and just in ryhmes with devoured and YOSHI STOP TALKING TO ME oh no ron oh bush an idiot thats what ur supposed to get out of this e-mail wait a second wat does the e in e-mail does it mean electronic electric or elephant or erl or enviromentally studies or electronic trans maffalying hermafro cellular 5 speed automatic jugglar junction all new dell axim x5 with sun roof and no power windows avaible new car
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Every once in a while, he says something thats so stupid its brilliant. God damn, even I can't respond to this very well. Once again no puncuation... Oh, but that part about NIGGERS was good. Can't have the word NIGGER enough times on a page. NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER. Eat it, bitches. I also have to agree with the pretty kitty thing. Man, thats just what I was thinking. Yoshi is a japense kid that most of you wont reconize... and I always could swear e-mail ment "Eat my mail bomb you son of a bich". Ok, so maybe that wasn't to creative. Screw you.
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