Africa
Africa. A great big area full of…stuff. I went there one time. It was great fun. Yes, great fun , indeed. I started out in east Africa. I then went to north Africa. I finished it off in south Africa. Great fun, indeed.
You may be wondering how I ended up in Africa. One day, I was sitting in my front yard when a big storm cloud suddenly flew in. I looked at it, and it said, "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, DOOMED FLEDGLING!!!" I said "WOW! A talking cloud, oh my goodness." It said, "YOU WILL BE DOOMED!!!", so I said, "Hey, you know you end every sentence with three exclamation points, and that you talk in completely capital letters?" He said, "D’I KNOW!!!" He then promptly picked me up with is large tornado-y fingers, and flung me in the direction of Africa. An elephant conveniently broke my fall. That, my friend, is how I ended up in Africa.
After the elephant dropped me off at the watering hole, I quickly deduced that I was in east Africa. A monkey with a sign reading, "You are now in East Africa" confirmed my suspicions as he scampered by. I began to wander. I said, "Boy, a real live walkabout!" Then I realized I was in Africa, not Australia. As I walked, I saw the Great Rift Valley. It has very large, some may even say…huge…? It made a rather large (...huge…?) Y-shaped trench with huge (or…rather large…?) escarpments. Some were over a mile high. That’s more than 5280 feet, some might say. After walking a little east, I noticed that the land suddenly turned to water. "Oh no!", I thought, "some one has DROWNED Africa!" I then realized it was just the Indian Ocean. A vast expanse of…water. H2O, some might say. More water than can fit in a bathtub, let me tell you. After that, I walked back west, the opposite of east. I found myself in a warm. desert climate, which was fitting, seeing as how I was in the desert and all. It was rather humid and there was no water there. I found myself thinking, "Boy, the Indian Ocean should move here, let me tell you. Don’t get me started, don’t even get me started." I heard a low growling and turned around to find a cheetah. He was rather large, much bigger than an insect, yet much smaller than a planet. He growled again and I said "Hi, kitty." It then leapt at me and grabbed my leg in its mouth. He ran. He was rather fast. 68 miles per hour, some might say. He dragged me all the way to north Africa.
After the cheetah dropped me off at the watering hole, I figured, "Hey, he was dragging me north, so I must be in…NORTH AFRICA!!" A monkey then confirmed my deduce-ations with a sign that read "You are now in North Africa". What a talented little monkey. After a bit of wandering, I found the Atlas Mountains. It is one of Africa’s only mountain ranges. They were rather large, too. After I traversed that Atlas Mountains, I came upon the Strait of Gibraltar. I was a-walkin’ and almost fell in ‘cause I could see the other side, but there was WATER in between the LAND! Do you believe that?! Don’t get me started, don’t even get me started. I then turned around and found myself in…more desert. "There should be a Strait of Gibrlatar here ‘cause it sure is hot, I tell you what!", said I. All of a sudden, an African Small-Spotted Genet sacampered out in front of me. "Holy mackerel, an African Small-Spotted Genet!", I said. It was African, and grey, and it had small black spots, only they were in lines. It looked like a cat, only it was a binturong an animal like a cat, only not, and it had a long strip’d tail like a lemur. It was holing what looked to be a nut of some kind. It stopped, looked at me, looked at the nut it was holding, looked back at me, reared back, and threw it, right at my forehead! That binturong should play baseball, cause it was a direct hit!. That elephant came back and I grabbed onto its tail as it walked by. Boy, I tell ya, those elephants, they don’t like it when you grab onto their tails as they walk by. It trumpeted and ran like the wind, boy I tell you what. Southward bound, it seemed to be headed.
After the elephant dropped me off at the watering hole, I didn’t even have time to hink as the monkey ran by with a "you are in South Africa" sign. A talented monkey indeed. I walked a little southwest until I was in the Namib Desert. I thought there should be a Strait of Gibraltar there, too. Westwards, I walked, ‘til I reached the Atlantic Ocean. "Ah, Atlantic Ocean. Why must you be water so that I cannot walk on you?" said I. After that, I walked back to find…yet more desert. "Geez," said I, "this place is all desert." Little did I know to walk inwards, where there would be a tropical rain forest. Suddenly, a small animal, named a Spring Hare, jump’d out at me. It was small, and was a rodent, not a bunny. Silly people, naming a rabbit after a bunny. It had a long bushy tail and big ears, just like a bunny. Except bunnys have little, fluffy tails. Oops. More accurately, it looked rather like a Pikachu, only reddish-brown and black. It then dug a hole and hopped inside. I started walking t’wards the coast. I found a cardboard box and set sail. First though, I made an eyepatch out of leaves. Then I said "ARRRRR!" , which reminded me of a joke I heard one time. Have you heard of that new pirate movie? It’s rated ARRRRRRRR! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ok, so I set a course for home.
I ended up in Europe. Once I realized this, I set sail for home, but not before accidentally going to Antarctica. Boxes don’t have very good direction. I eventually got home. I sat outside in my front yard and a black storm cloud came out and said "BWAHAHAHA—" Oh yeah. I told this part already. So here I am. Home. Which isn’t Africa. Boy I tell you what, though, it sure was fun!