The
cruelest dream, reality
Summary:
Usagi dreams of her time as a blissfully innocent teenager, and rages against
fate for taking it away. She wants out(death-
come to me), but struggles deal with the fact that there is no
way out, because there is nowhere else to go(no death). Of course, something(someone)
comes and changes everything. No
Mamoru-baka, or senshis in this fic, Deal with it.
Tsukino
Usagi chucked a rock into the still lake, using her anger to throw it farther
then normal. She was seventeen, but
already she had decided that she was tired of life. Too much had happened in the last three years of her life. Perhaps it was longer, since she had gone
forward and backward in time enough to confuse even Mizuno Ami, genius of
Juuban High. Either way, the thought of
death was one she had contemplated for months(lifetimes) now.
It’s prom
night. So many would ask why I am here,
instead of socializing like the ditz I am believed to be. She laughed at herself, at her friends, and
at fate who decided that she should be this way. She threw another rock at the water, wishing she could throw away
her anger and frustration as easily as that.
She had over a thousand(eternal) years of emotion to vent, and
there was no force on earth that would equal that.
Dammit, I
didn’t want this! She thought, staring at the glowing rock beside
her. She refused to call it anything
remotely complimenting. It was an
inanimate object, but she didn’t care.
She still hated it with all the passion she could muster. If only there was some way of destroying
it...(without destroying myself)
She threw
another rock, wishing that it was the glowing one beside her. But, unfortunately, that wouldn’t solve
anything, and the damned thing would only come back to her. You know, she thought at the glowing
rock, before I ever knew about you, all I had to think about was school,
eating, and video games. No saving the
world crap like nowadays. No wars. Damn, I feel so old.
She
grimaced. She was old, she just didn’t
look it. Oh, how she would laugh to see
the look on her parent’s faces if she were to tell them that their daughter was
actually a princess from a legendary kingdom from a thousand years in the past. What a laugh that would get, but she no
longer laughed at all.
Again,
she cursed fate and destiny as she threw another stone into the lake. Why was she unable to break the hold of
fate, when the rest of her former friends had?
Why had her prince managed to escape the hold of destiny, into the
relief of death, when she was forced to remain in this life, this planet? She railed silently at all the Gods she
could name, and at a few she could not.
Her friends had followed her former love into death. She longed for death, but not the death that
awaited her.
She was
cursed with the dream of madmen. She
was cursed with a dream of kings, emperors, a dream that she had never
had. A dream she called a nightmare. She was cursed with eternal life, only an
endless cycle of rebirth and reincarnation.
Some life. All I do is die,
or get in the way of some psyco who only wants to get this stupid rock or take
over the universe, or all freakin’ three.
Her first
friend among the senshis, Mizuno Ami, had passed on two months ago, when she
had gotten in the way of a stray bullet from an Oz soldier. Mako-chan had died fighting against her
captors, and though Usagi knew no more, she had felt the tall Amazon’s death
clearly, and painfully. Her best friend
among any of the senshis, Hino Rei, had died over two years ago, trapped in her
own shrine as it burned down. The last
of her inner senshis had died last week, as she fought to stay with her husband
as he was taken away by soldiers. She
had been shot in the head, and her body left to rot. Usagi had been the one to find her, moments before the beautiful
soldier of love had passed on. Aino
Minako had only looked into Usagi’s too old eyes, and said “This is it for us,
Usa-chan. We are not coming again...”
There was
only one interpretation of that remark, and Usagi knew it all too well. At least I know that I will be alone,
rather then wandering around my entire life(lives) searching for people
who will never again be alive.
nothing's free
longing for what used to be
still it's hard
hard to see
fragile lives
shattered dreams
Even
Haruka, Michiru, Hotaru and Setsuna are gone.
I didn’t believe that they would ever concern themselves enough with
Earth to ever be caught in it’s wars.
But this war is not like the others, a voice whispered in her
head. This one has ruined what the
mortals had built for themselves without our help. Perhaps Galaxia-chan had the right of it, however many years ago
it has been. Maybe humans are a mistake. But somehow, she couldn’t believe that. After all the dimensions, galaxies and
dreams she had traveled, she found it difficult to believe that humans were not
worthy of life. They had surmounted so
much, (and no matter to the fact that they had set up most of it themselves)
that maybe they as much right as the senshis to life, or other life forms.
Ironic
how it’s the Sailor Senshis that are dieing, and there are far less of us,
she thought sardonically. She had lost
contact with Galaxia in this life, and she supposed this reality was too far
from Galaxia’s home system.
She was
pulled out of her thoughts as she heard a noise coming from the bushes behind
her. She turned her head slowly, to see
a boy her age burst out of the bushes as if the hounds of mortal hell were
after him. She laughed inwardly at the
expression, knowing there was no such thing for her, no hell or
heaven. She also wondered curiously why
this boy wasn’t at the prom, seeing as he wore the same uniform she did.
The boy
had a long chestnut braid that swung madly behind him, and intense purple eyes
that made her think of Hotaru, the beautiful soldier of Death. He was no taller then she, and he stopped
abruptly when he saw her. He evidently
wasn’t expecting anyone to be there, but he threw a nervous glance behind him
into the trees and bushes that surround the lake. He must have heard something, because he grimaced.
“I do not
know what you are doing here, but you must leave now. Come with me, I will keep you safe.” He said no more, but he grabbed her hand, pulling her upright
quickly. He pulled her with him as he
dove off the edge of her vantage point, down towards the water.
Usagi
wondered at his audacity. How could he
possibly think that he could do that to a complete stranger? She had opened her mouth to say something,
but received a glare from the boy- a young man, really, his eyes were too old
for a seventeen year old- as if he had sensed she had been about to speak. They landed in a bush near the edge of the
water, and he quickly rolled her under it, with him.
“Don’t
say a word,” he whispered tersely. Usagi
saw no harm in not complying, and so turned her attention to her bare
arms. She had only been wearing her
school uniform, whose short sleeves were only a light cotton fabric. The scrapes on her arms were lightly
bleeding dark red blood, a few shades too dark to be human. As she watched, the cuts closed, and she
brushed off the now-dried blood. The
man who had grabbed her was also watching her, and she groaned to wonder what
he was now thinking. But he said
nothing, so she turned her face away, gazing again at the lake.
When they
heard a gun shot ring through the woods above them, Usagi ignored his order and
said, quietly still, “Oz no senshi ka?” [An Oz soldier?]
She
received a glare from the boy/man that reminded Usagi of Rei-chan at her
worst. It also reminded her of
Mamoru-baka at the last time she had seen him.
“Takusan no senshi” [Many soldiers] he whispered shortly, and she
got the idea that she had better shut her mouth.
She
stayed silent, but not idle. She
reached out with her mind, searching for those who were hunting the man. She found them, and allowed herself to be
shocked. There was nearly an entire
army after this man! She wondered if he
knew there were so many, but decided against saying anything.
She
continued to ‘watch’ the Oz soldiers, until they were out of hearing
range. She told the man that, and he
nodded slowly, but she could see that he did not trust her. What could possibly have happened to this
boy to turn him so suspicious?(Still it’s hard| hard to see| fragile lives |
shattered dreams) I may not be human
but I do look it. He stood up
slowly, drawing away from the bush.
Suddenly, he dived into the lake, surprising Usagi.
She
watched him swim away, until the murky waters hid him. If he was so eager to get away, why
didn’t he say so? She wondered. She
decided to follow him, just for the fun of it.
She
stepped out onto the lake, wandering off in the direction the braided boy had
gone. She hoped that no one was around,
because though she didn’t particularly care what the humans thought of her,
awkward questions would be asked if they saw a woman walking on water.
He
went... thataway, she thought, turning west into the setting
sun. The glorious light of the burning
star blinded her for a moment, but she closed her eyes and continued on. Why the hell am I doing this, again?
she asked herself. I must be going
soft. Rei would laugh her ass off to
hear that. (Longing for what used to be)
Something
splashed her, forcing her to open her eyes once more. She blinked long eyelashes, then widened her eyes in shock as a
large thing flew away right before her eyes. Her quick glimpse showed only gleaming metal, that looked
slightly... humanoid. (Now I can go
crazy) I’ve seen a flying machine with a glowing scythe in its hand. Yup, definitely time to go insane. If she didn’t already know it was
technically impossible for that to happen to her, she would have believed it.
Perhaps
something to do with the young man I was chasing? she
asked herself curiously. There was no
sign beneath the water that the braided man was still there, and the water
sprites said no more about the intruder.
It really is shame I don’t have Ami-chan’s ability with the water
creatures.
She
returned back to shore, and to her previous spot. But when she had gotten comfortable again, she realized that she
could no longer concentrate on her thoughts.
Just great. And the
godsdamned rock is still here.
Usagi
sighed as she rubbed her temples, and returned her gaze to the computer
screen. The laptop had been one of her
few indulgements to technology in her small apartment, as she had no real need
to eat, or have heat. She wondered how
she had changed so much from the ditz who had been stuffing her face at every
opportunity. Perhaps I grew up? she
thought wryly, knowing it was the answer.
She
surfed around, searching for recent news.
She rarely paid any attention to the news broadcasts, at least not since
the blonde ditz claiming to be the lost Peacecraft princess had begun to take
over the screens. Usagi knew that peace
and pacifism was a foolish dream for fools, and did not consider herself to be
a fool.
Her
attention caught on an article describing something called Gundams. Gundams... I’ve heard that before.
Something from a careless Oz soldier? She browsed the article, and any others pertaining to the Gundams
curiously. She found a few blurry
photos of them, and smiled when she recognized them. That’s definitely what I saw.
But there
was disconcerting trend to all of the articles. Oz had control over the news network, and the underlying message
to any news reports on the Gundams or their pilots(Pilots?) was that
they should be captured at any cost. Maybe
Oz has a little extra information then?
Usagi smiled wickedly, and accessed the main Oz website. She explored it, before realizing what she
wanted wasn’t there.
But Usagi
didn’t learn nothing from all the hours she had spent on the thing. She carefully hacked into the Oz database,
and pulled up the files on the Gundams.
There were five, but she already knew that. Apparently numbered that way, as well. Either someone was really unoriginal when they named these
five, or Oz doesn’t know their real names. (Nothing’s free) There was barely more information on the
Gundams themselves, but seeing as they were large bodies of metal she was not
too surprised.
But her
interest did light up as she read the file on 02. Piloting the Gundam that looked exactly like the one she had
seen, briefly, his physical description suited him exactly as well. Curious.
So maybe he did have reason to have an entire army on his heels. I wonder what he did? (If he
lives?)(Shattered dreams)
After
reading the rest of the files, she shut down her computer, double-checking to
make sure her little activity hadn’t been noticed. That had only happened once, and she had never left anything
unchecked now. She would go search for
02 tomorrow. Oz had only a general idea
where the five pilots were holed up, but she would be able to find them using a
better sort of radar. Nothing beats
magic, not even fancy technology.
She smirked. That boy-young man-
would regret pulling her off a cliff, not matter how small. After all, the Queen of the Moon(Selenity-mama)
and the entire Sol solar system deserved a bit more courtesy then that.
Yes I know that was beyond freakishly weird. Blame it on inspiration, and listening to my
brothers music through two floors and a whole lot of rooms. Meh.
There is not much plot going for this, but I do have an idea. Any helpful hints would be helpful,
however. Please read + review. Should I continue (sequel?)