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Happy Halloween!
The Duckling and the Puppy
<click
here>
for the video clip of these critturs at play!:-))
Why Dogs Bite Their Owners!
The Kiss
He had just saved her
from a fire in her house, rescuing her by carrying her out of the
house into her front yard, and then continued to fight the fire.
She is pregnant.
When he finally got done
putting the fire out, he sat down to catch his breath and rest.
A photographer from the
Charlotte, North Carolina newspaper, "The Observer,"
noticed her in the distance looking at the fireman.
He saw her walking
straight toward the fireman and wondered what she was going to do.
As he raised his camera,
she came up to the tired man who had saved her life and the lives of
her babies, and kissed him, just as the photographer snapped this
photograph.
And people say animals
are dumb
HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY
!!!!!
Strange Puppy
One of the pups in a
breeder's litter of collies had a strange appetite,
fostered no doubt,
because the dog fancier's kennel was deep in the southern United
States.
The odd youngster spurned regular dog food,
no meaty tid-bits could tempt him and he hated dog biscuits.
Just in time to save the
little dog's life, the owner found he would eat nothing but melons.
He doted on them.

His brother pups could
not understand this and they teased him unmercifully.
He
became the butt of their pranks until his tail would droop and he
would whimper and shiver in a corner.
His mother, trying to
comfort him, called him to her
She said
"Come to me,
my Melon....... collie......... baby."
Snoring
A couple has a dog that
snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to
see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around
the dog's testicles, and he will stop snoring. "Yeah right!"
she says.
A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring, as
usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to
herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of red ribbon and
ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog
stops snoring! The woman is amazed!
Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out
drinking with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep and
begins snoring loudly. The woman thinks maybe the ribbon might work
on him. So, she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of blue
ribbon and ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it
also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly.
The husband wakes from his drunken stupor and stumbles into the
bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the
mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very
confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees the red
ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks
at the dog and whispers, "I don't know where we were .... or
what we did ... but, by God ... We took first and second place."
Warning: UK bird flu - first
victim confirmed
How to tell you're speeding!
"You're Driving Too
Fast Again!"
New Use for the x- pen
Herb Baker in his X-Pen
protecting himself from all the dogs after knee surgery
Pooper
Scooper
with thanks to Willem
Wijnberg
Beautiful
Blonde pole dancer
With thanks to Herb Baker
Best Positions in Bed
These Speak for themselves!
For more
Longlease Bernese Mountain Dogs Humour
Page 2 <click
here>
Page
3 <click
here>
Page 4
<click here>
*Samson's
Story *My Gang
*Sunny,Simmy,Barney,Pixie
*Friend's Gallery
*In Loving Memory*
*Histio
Roll Call *Bernese Art
*Berner Fun Stuff
*Berner Articles & Info
*Berner Shop*
*Longlease
Links. *Humour.
*Guestbook.
*Berner Fundraisers*
*Longlease Bernese Mountain Dogs Home
Page*
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