Jealousy (Parts I, II, III) by David Houghton I looked at the photos I got from Nabiki's drawer, blinked, shook my head and waited for them to disappear. They didn't. Well, he is a pervert. I'd never really believed that. To do such a thing... how could he? And claiming he wasn't interested. That Bitch! How dare he - no, she - do this. To think that Ranma was having sex with Ryouga. No wonder he pretended to hate him. I could hardly believe it. I believed it, though. I needed someone to talk to. If I talked to school friends, I'd soon be a laughing stock. What's more, my family would be dishonoured. These had to be left here so I could see them. Nabiki was a good sister. I could think of only one person to talk to who would keep it a secret. Not that she'd mind Xian Pu killing him, but the fallout would be terrible, at least for us. I decided to talk to Ukyou about it. Ukyou would be sympathetic, if she didn't think it was fake. She would also be murderous. Hopefully, she would attack Ranma rather than me. It was time to go. I left and headed to the Uc-chan's. There, Ukyou was with the customers. She (no, he) was looking at me with a powerful glare. "I need to talk to you, Ukyou." "Fine. Do it out here." "In private. Concerning a mutual friend." "Come in. Right-ho, it's two o' clock, so it's my lunch break. Everybody out." The place emptied at a miraculous speed. Once the blinds were drawn, Ukyou looks at me in such a way to tell me to hurry up and stop wasting her time. I took out one of the two remaining negatives and gestured to it. Ukyou was about to hand them back when she noticed who was on them. "Ranma and Ryouga?" spluttered Ukyou. "It's not funny, you know. She doesn't want to marry any of us, and, if this gets out, my family will be dishonoured." "That perverted bitch! How could she? I'll kill her!" ***** Well, later, when Ranma wandered into the Uc-chan's, Ukyou decided to rib him. Akane was hidden behind the kitchen door. Akane heard a conversation like this: "You know, you and Ryouga'd make a cute couple." "Look, I'm a GUY!" "But, you chased after him once." "I'm a GUY! okay, and I was under a spell." "Men sometimes like other men, you know." "Look, I am not interested in Ryouga." KEERRRAANG went the door and I heard Ukyou yell: "AND DON'T EVER COME BACK, YOU PERVERTED JERK!" Funny: Ukyou doesn't normally say that. Oh well. Plan B then: Kill her! (no, not Ukyou, Ranma!) Ukyou and I practiced against each other. Ukyou, in the end, wasn't that much better than me, for some strange reason. "I don't understand it, you can clock Ranma without effort and I'm winning," goes Ukyou. This made me mad at her. "Powerful are you, but control no." "Thanks a lot, Yoda," I yell, performing my ultimate technique. You know which one. We plot and scheme a but more, pretending we hadn't caught on to her betrayal of us. We must strike quickly before she knows about this. We go off to school early and wait for 'Ranko'. We decided to punish her. We exact our vengeance when we hear three words spoken in a voice which is a chilling mix of ice and venom. "That is enough." I stop in shock. Only now do I understand how Ranma feels about Nabiki. Ukyou and I are just about to regroup when Kasumi enters. ***** Nabiki stares at Ukyou and me. She then speaks. "With the amount of magic that goes flying around here, did you ever consider the fact they might have got a dose? Now, Ukyou, I need to talk to my sister alone." Ukyou leaves and heads to the door. She gives a look which says "this isn't finished" then leaves. "Akane, this has been brewing for a long time. And you can hardly be surprised this has happened, playing your stupid, sick, twisted mind games, sleeping with one and calling the other your fiance. Are you really surprised they found comfort in each other? Anyway, it was just a kiss." "I never slept with Ryou...?" Then, what Ranma has been implying clicks. Ryouga is P-chan. I am furious and about to leave when Nabiki commands me to stop. There is no other word for it. I freeze. Nabiki then orders me to calm down and points out that it was my fault, Ranma tried to do his best, and then leaves. She heads off to hospital. Could I have lost him to Ryouga? I remember the morning. Ranma handed P-chan to me and he leapt straight back into male Ranma's hands and I swung my mallet - without even realizing it. Nabiki was right - I knew. I want to blame someone else but I can't. Not anymore. Ranma would never break his engagement with me even if I was at fault. I have to do it. Ranma can no longer love me even if he forgives. But, most of all, I cannot forgive myself. ***** Still, I am afraid of what will happen at the hospital. My sister has denied us access to Ranma, which is sensible considering the way we behaved. At least Kuno and Kodachi could believe Ranma loved them. I am still jealous, despite the fact I'd lost Ranma. Growing me up cost me my love. I sat on my bed. I didn't even feel like breaking blocks, which is what I usually do when depressed or angry. Kasumi came in and talked to me. She lent an extremely sympathetic ear, even if it didn't really help. A few days later, just when I was coming out of my sorry for myself state, Nabiki bought a bouquet of roses. When I asked who they were for, she told me. Ryouga says he has a heart of glass. At least his was still intact. Mine was in a thousand pieces. Things got worse soon after that. Nabiki had come home with Ranma. They'd been talking and laughing. Nabiki and Ranma seemed to be happy together. I left the room. However, morbid curiosity kept my ear glued to the wall. Nabiki and Ranma suggested that the engagement be left in the air for the time being, since they didn't really need the pressure and they felt that as long as it wasn't made too official, the engagement was more likely to be kept. They were still nervous, but at least they weren't attacking each other. A surge of jealousy coursed through me. I batted it down. This was what had lost me Ranma in the end. My jealousy, if I had considered long enough, I would not have leapt to the wrong conclusion. Still, I'll go and talk to Ukyou. At least he understands how I feel. I went to Ukyou with a bunch of flowers. Why the hell did you do that, Akane? Ukyou is a girl. Why did you buy flowers for him then? I almost asked Ukyou on a date. Why did I do that? I can't help thinking of Ukyou as a man, though, and my short time with Ranma has taught me that inside is more important than outside. Oh no. I'm not, am I? ***** I still entered the Ucchan's and asked him out. She looked at me. He liked me. Then he looked at me gently. Then he spoke. "Oh, Akane, what sex am I?" "Male," I replied. He stared at me and kissed me on the mouth. I reacted badly. Not because of that, but my own feelings. Ukyou looked at me pityingly. He then spoke. "I went through this myself. Ranma is still going through it. I always saw you as a one-sex girl. Yet I always thought you were straight. But something's trying to worm your way past your homophobia. Sort yourself out, Ac-chan, then, come back." I head home and, as I do, memories start being seen. A woman turned up, not a man. Me asking someone wanting to be friends. But that brilliance would have usually made me an enemy. Nabiki's jealousy, until I saw Ranma naked as a woman. The Romeo and Juliet play. The tape, Ranma. "I can't kiss a man, no matter the prize." The smiles I give to a soaking wet and female Ranma. The end before our failed wedding. Actually coming back when Ranma said, I was more important than his curse. Why was I so embarrassed about Ranma kissing me in the phoenix pill? Did I hit Ranma because he was a a woman or because he was a man? Was "Pervert" a defense to stop people looking too closely at how I felt? My attempts to stop Ranma from getting the instant nannichuan when I thought it was permanent. The Japanese nannichuan. Did I try and stop him because I didn't believe his excuse or because I did? My sadness when I thought he had found it. And my utter relief when it turned out just to be a water mains. Even P-chan was a comforter to convince me that I liked men. The anger was at me. I directed it at Ranma because he showed what I wanted hidden. I headed for the room and get out the tanto. I was about to start it when Nabiki grabs my hand. "What on earth has caused you so much dishonour that you need to commit seppuku?" "I'm a disgusting dishonourable pervert." "So? Happosai hasn't needed to commit seppuku yet." "His is more natural." "Akane, let me help you. What is the matter?" "I like women." "So?" "Really like them." "You're a lesbian? Dr. Tofu?" "Child-hood crush." "Yeah, I've heard you can get crushes opposite to your sexual orientation." "Heard?" "I can't. Part of me being boycrazy was to hide, even from myself, the fact that I like girls just as much. Ranma? Ah, they're cute, both of him." "See how I acted. I was always happier with him as a girl. I sabotaged many of his efforts to become male." "Still, the engagment's been moved. So no dishonour comes from that. Now which girl do you like?" "Ukyou. She's beautiful and she likes me. You know what really gets me? Shampoo will never let me live it down." "What?" "Pervert Girl. What else?" "There's nothing wrong. And marrying Ukyou is acceptable. I didn't think she was lesbian, though." "I think she's the same as you and Ranma, bi." "Yeah, makes sense. Still talk to her. Just because you're not in the majority doesn't mean you have to commit seppuku. I haven't." I returned to the Uc-chan's. She looked at me. I kissed her, and said, "You're a beautiful woman, Uc-chan." She returns the kiss. This is wrong. No, it isn't, it's perfectly natural and I am happy doing this. No, you're not. Yes, I am. "You've improved. A bit more time's needed. But I'll go out with you. I was afraid you'd have committed suicide." "I almost did." "Who stopped you?" "Nabiki. She pointed out that Happosai was more perverted, she was more dishonorable and neither of them had committed seppuku, and finally the engagement had been moved. Took all my excuses away. I realised that you implied Ranma was bi. I think he is. I've seen him make moves on Ryouga before the passion spice. That's why I was so angry." "You have? I was right. He'd be fun in bed." "I like women though. Ranma's kind and generous, but not for me. Ryouga or Nabiki can have him." "Nabiki?" "Bi. Though she said she was frightened because Ranma was both man and woman. If he'd been one or the other, though - well, she'd have been the fiancee... I believe her."