Title: Relena's Worst Nightmare
Warning: yaoi, lemon, RFO, Relena bashing
Disclaimers: don't own, don't sue, don't ask,
Heero had had enough. He was sick of Relena and
her incessant stalking of
him. Everywhere he went, there she was, with that
annoying whine of hers. He
resolved that, once and for all, he would put
a stop to this. No matter what
drastic measures were required. This would be
Relena sat in her pink bedroom in her pink mansion,
at her pink desk, writing
with her pink glitter pen on hot pink paper. She
wore a pink taffeta dress,
and her hair was up in pink ribbons. Are we sensing
a theme here?
So what was the Queen of the World writing? Important
words, no doubt. A
peace treaty, perhaps, or a proposal to end world
hunger? No, Relena-sama was
practicing her signature. Or rather, the signature
she would use after she
married Heero. She wrote:
Mrs. Relena Yuyâ€¦
Mrs. Heero Yuyâ€¦
You get the idea. Over and over. With flourishes.
In different styles. Over
A beep sounded. Relena chirped, "Yes?"
A nameless servant's voice came over the intercom,
"We've located him, Miss
She giggled, "Goodie!" and flounced off to change
into yet another pink
The pilots had all been thoroughly briefed on their
roles in this crucial
mission. Nothing was left to chance, every detail
was rehearsed. If they
didn't eliminate Relena this time, Heero was going
to lose control
Timing was critical. Each pilot had a role and
it needed to be executed with
precision. Information was leaked, the trail was
laid, she had only to follow
it. They knew she wouldn't resist the bait.
Quatre's voice crackled over the scrambled, secure
channel to Trowa. "04
here. I've broadcasted the coordinates."
Trowa's monotone responded, "Understood. Commencing
Later, Wufei's voice could be heard, transmitting
on a prearranged frequency,
"Target is on route to coordinates. 05 out."
Heero sat at his laptop, GPS tracking system charting
the progress of
Relena's pink monstrosity of a car. It was approaching
his location, just as
predicted. Heero radioed, "All units, plan proceeding
as scheduled. Return to
base. I'll take it from here."
Quatre, Trowa and Wufei acknowledged, and returned
to the safehouse, glad
they were not the ones to complete this mission.
Heero, however, relished the end to this mission.
He would be free forever
from the specter of Relena. It was a dirty job,
but someone had to do it.
Heero went to prepare.
Relena drove the car herself, wanting to meet Heero
alone. She giggled with
excitement. Heero had rescued her before, now
was her chance to do the same
for him. The radio plea for help was in Heero's
personal code, and from the
response, no one could get to his location for
several days. Heero wasn't
seriously hurt, but couldn't get to safety on
his own. He had indicated that
he would wait for pickup. Relena giggled. After
she saved his life, he would
have no choice but to admit his undying love for
her and propose marriage.
She rehearsed how she would respond. Should she
say yes right away, or
pretend to think about it?
As she approached the dilapidated cabin, Relena
wrinkled her upturned nose
with distaste. It was not exactly the place she
would have imagined for the
beginning of her destiny with Heero, but at least
it was secluded. No one
would bother them here. Especially not that horrible
Duo Maxwell, whose hair
was longer than hers and who was always hanging
around her Heero,
interrupting their moments together. She wasn't
sure why, but she was
terribly jealous of the long-haired pilot. It
didn't make sense to her
deluded little mind, why she
was jealous of Duo. He was another boy, after
all. No threat to her romance
with Heero. Yet, she had this irrational urge
to scratch those violet eyes
out every time she saw him.
Relena bounced out of the car, first aid kit firmly
in hand, and flounced
over to the door. Trying the door, she found it
unlocked, and stepped in,
squealing, "Heeeeero! I'm here to save you!"
Getting no response, she took another step into
the dimly lit interior of the
cabin. Locking the door behind her, she looked
around. Then she heard a sound
from what must be the bedroom. Relena strode fearlessly
toward the sound.
Pushing the creaky door open, she peered into
the darkness before taking
another step that brought her fully into the room.
The door slammed shut behind her. She whirled around,
to see her Heero
standing by the door smirking. "Heero!" she cried
out, just before Heero
started to move.
Relena felt herself pinned against the wall by
the Perfect Soldier's
incredible strength. Her simple mind immediately
jumped to the wrong
conclusion. She felt a thrill of excitement as
she felt Heero against her,
and closed her eyes and licked her lips, preparing
for the inevitable
What she felt, however, was the cold steel of handcuffs
around her wrists.
Her eyes flew open as she felt her now-cuffed
hands lifted above her head and
secured to the wall behind her. She tried to struggle
preparations were as perfect as he was. Relena's
eyes widened as he
approached her. Fear began to creep into her universe.
"H-Heero?" Relena managed to squeak. Then she came
to a realization. Well, if
this was the sort of thing Heero went for, she
could handle it, as long as
they were together. Relena knew about Heero's
upbringing, and she reflected
that a certain amount of roughness might be expected
from someone trained as
a soldier from such a young age. But of course
it was just play, he would
never hurt her. Heero's kinkiness was unexpected,
but not insurmountable. "If
you wanted this, Heero, all you had to do was
If anything, Heero's smirk increased as he as he
closed the distance between
them. He stood inches from her and just smirked.
Then he spoke.
"You just don't get it, do you? After I threaten
to kill you, ignore you, and
evade you all this time, you didn't get the hint,"
Heero almost laughed.
Relena just looked confused. Then a thought emerged.
"I thought you were
Heero continued, "Do I look hurt?" With that, he
stripped off his tank top.
Relena gasped as she looked upon his smooth, hard
Relena shook her head, completely confused.
"Well, you finally got something right, then,"
Heero answered. "But now you
think you're tied up here so we canâ€¦
ughâ€¦ have some S and M fun?"
Relena nodded, not so sure of herself now.
Heero actually laughed at that. "You're even more
deluded than we thought."
Relena started to get slightly frightened now.
Heero had said, "we."
Heero saw the fear on Relena's face, and despite
the fact that he preferred
that expression to her normal lovestruck one,
he said, "If you're worried
about your safety, don't. The only thing I'm going
to harm tonight are your
preconceptions. The restraints are so you don't
run away before you get the
Relena started to say, "But, Heeroâ€¦"
Heero interrupted, "And that brings us to the last
of the preparations." With
that, he pulled out a roll of duct tape and firmly
taped Relena's mouth shut
so the only sound she could make as a faint whining
Heero stood in front of her, inspecting the restraints.
Satisfied, he turned
and flipped a switch, saying, "Then let the show
Relena gasped (or tried to) as the spotlight illuminated
the bed. On the bed
was Duo, naked except for black silk boxers and
a completely unfair amount of
hair. The usually braided hair was unbound, and
it flowed around him in
silken chestnut waves. The light reflected off
the golden highlights so Duo
appeared to glow as he sat in the middle of the
bed. Duo made a breathtaking
sight, and his body was as incredible as Heero's.
"Beautiful, isn't he?" Heero's voice startled her.
He seemed to be waiting
for a response, so she nodded, with no idea of
what was happening.
Duo smiled at the compliment, and replied, "Not
as beautiful as you, koi."
Relena's mind whirled. Koi? That meantâ€¦
no! It didn't make sense, it couldn't
beâ€¦ Relena began to shake
her head, no.
"No?" mocked Heero. "No, to what?"
Duo snickered. "I still don't think she gets it."
Heero smirked, "I didn't think she was THAT stupid.
I thought she would have
figured it out by now." As he said these words,
he walked slowly toward the
long-haired boy on the bed.
Relena was still struggling. She couldn't quite
wrap her mind around what was
going on. It was too incomprehensible to her narrow
"Well, there's no other alternative then, we have
to proceed with the
mission," stated Heero as he reached the bed.
"Ninmu ryoukai," murmured Heero as he kneeled on
the bed next to Duo.
Duo smiled up at him and said, "Go for it, baby."
Relena's mind threatened to come unhinged as she
saw her Heero bend over Duo
and press him back to the bed, until he was completely
on top of the other
boy. Bare chests pressed together as Heero lowered
himself slowly toward
Duo's mouth. Her brain screamed what her mouth
could not: no, no, no, no!
Just before their lips touched, Heero looked over
at Relena to be sure she
was watching. He smiled, then claimed Duo's mouth
in a deep kiss.
Relena couldn't have torn her eyes away if she
wanted to. She couldn't accept
this, couldn't. Heero loved her! Duo was a boy!
It couldn't be real! NO! Her
Heero was kissing Duo! Relena's already tenuous
grip on sanity began to slip.
As Heero kissed Duo, he began to push his hips
against Duo's. Duo moaned into
his mouth and pushed back. Heero began to thrust
slowly against the other boy
as they broke the kiss, panting.
Heero lifted himself up on his hands and turned
his head to look at Relena.
"Do you get it yet?"
Duo snickered. "Maybe not, but we sure are."
Heero smiled a smile reserved only for his violet-eyed
love. Then he again
looked at the captive audience.
"Do you understand yet? I don't love you," Heero
lowered his head and kissed
Duo's neck. "I never loved you." Heero continued
to kiss downward, teasing
Duo's nipples and making the long-haired boy gasp.
"I don't even like you."
Now Heero was kissing Duo's smoothly muscled stomach.
"I like boys." Heero
dipped his tongue into Duo's bellybutton, and
Duo made a small sound of
protest and bucked his hips. "Specifically, this
boy." Heero hooked a finger
into the waistband of Duo's boxers. "In fact,
I love him." Duo was moaning
now as Heero slipped his hand inside the boxers.
"And now, I'm going to show
you exactly how much I love Duo." Heero stroked
Duo's hardness, then slid the
boxers off, revealing the very aroused boy.
"Mmmmmm this is so kinky, Heero," gasped Duo as
he lay back on the bed, naked
Heero looked at Duo. Duo looked incredible, hair
spread around him, lithe
body stretched out for Heero. He ached to make
love to Duo, right now. It
only made it sweeter to have Relena watching,
proving to her beyond a shadow
of a doubt that he loved only Duo.
He looked at Relena again. Her eyes were as wide
as saucers as he wriggled
seductively out of his spandex. She tried to gasp
as he stood naked and
unashamed before her.
Relena would have sobbed if the gag had allowed
her to do so. Heero was even
more gorgeous unclothed, as she knew he must be.
His manhood stood hard and
huge as he looked down at Duo. She still couldn't
accept it; it was all a
joke at her expense, she was sure, and Heero would
relent soon, untie her and
Heero smirked. The woman was beyond belief. "I
can't kill you, because you
are necessary to keep the word in peace. I don't
want to kill if I don't have
to. I've killed too many innocents. But you won't
leave us alone. I can see
that you still don't believe the truth, even now.
So watch, and believe. I am
going to make love to Duo now. Do you get it?
I'm going to fuck my BOYfriend.
You're going to watch, and hopefully you
will finally believe."
Relena watched in horror as Heero approached the
bed, and Duo. Duo smiled and
lay back invitingly, opening his legs wide for
Heero. "You are such a hentai,
Hee-chan," Duo purred.
Heero crawled onto the bed and pushed between Duo's
legs, spreading them
wider apart. Glancing down at Duo's rock hard
erection, he said, "You don't
seem to mind very much."
The bed was parallel to the wall Relena was chained
to, so she had a perfect
view of everything that was going on. She wanted
to close her eyes, but found
she couldn't. Revulsion and hysteria welled up
inside her as he watched Heero
press his body fully against Duo, rubbing his
engorged manhood against Duo's.
Duo threw back his head and moaned softly as he
felt Heero's hardness rub
against his. The wonderful friction increased
until he was biting back his
Heero kissed Duo hard, then said, "I want to hear
you scream, Duo. Don't be
quiet because of her. I want her to hear you scream
my name as I take you. I
want her to hear you moan from the pleasure I
give you. I want her to hear
and see how much I love you. Only then will she
Duo nodded, unable to speak. Then Heero thrust
his hips savagely and Duo
"That's better," smiled Heero.
Relena watched as Heero's mouth once again traveled
down Duo's body, stopping
just short of his straining arousal. Oh, no, he's
not going to... she
couldn't believe her eyes as Heero began to lick
Duo's erection. Then he
began to suck on it as if it were a Popsicle,
taking it all into his mouth
Heero continued to lavish attention on Duo's hardness,
making the violet-eyed
boy moan louder and louder. Up and down
Heero's mouth went, driving Duo to
new heights of ecstasy. Duo was screaming now,
and he grabbed Heero's hair,
thrusting himself deeper into Heero's mouth.
Duo couldn't stand it any more,
and screaming Heero's name, he climaxed violently.
Heero swallowed every
drop, making sure that Relena was still watching
as he licked his lips. "You
are delicious, Duo."
The he gathered Duo into his arms and kissed the
momentarily sated boy.
Reaching into the bedside table, Heero withdrew
a small tube and went about
preparing his love for the final act.
By the time Duo was prepared for Heero, the longhaired
boy was fully aroused
again and begging for Heero to take him. Relena's
eyes seemed like they would
pop out of her skull, but still she watched.
Heero positioned himself, then looked up to make
sure he had Relena's full
attention. "Are you watching? Duo, tell me. Tell
me what you want me to do to
"Oh, Heero," begged Duo, not caring if the entire
world heard him, "Please, I
want you inside me. Take me, Heero. Please. Fuck
Locking eyes with Relena, Heero slowly pushed himself
into Duo's tight body,
making sure she could see how it made him feel
to impale the other boy.
Relena backed up against the wall, head thrashing
back and forth as she tried
to deny the evidence before her. Denial turned
to anger as she desperately
tried to break free, to save Heero from whatever
spell that long-haired devil
had cast upon him.
Heero turned his attention back to Duo as he buried
himself to the hilt in
his violet-eyed love. He bent down to claim Duo's
mouth again as he started
to thrust. Relena was forgotten as he lost himself
in the ecstasy that was
Duo. Stroke after stroke took them higher, until
nothing existed for the two
of them except pure white pleasure. Heero reached
down to stroke Duo's
arousal, and unimaginable sensation increased
as Duo climaxed, tightening on
Heero's hardness deep inside. Duo screamed Heero's
name. Heero pumped one
last time into the white-hot heat, growled, "You're
mine, Duo," and released
At the moment of Heero's climax, Relena lost consciousness,
her mind unable
to reconcile its delusions with the scene before
her. She slumped in her
Heero collapsed as gently as possible beside Duo.
The long-haired boy was
still panting. He brushed back Duo's sweat-soaked
hair and searched his
love's face. "I love you, Duo."
Duo smiled weakly. "I know."
"Thank you for doing this for me," Heero murmured
in Duo's ear.
"I hope it worked," answered Duo.
Looking over at the unconscious girl, Heero replied,
"I don't think she'll
Duo laughed, "Neither will I!"
Heero smiled at Duo, and they reluctantly dragged
themselves up and got
On the way out, they left a message with Relena's
staff as to where she could
be found. They released her cuffs and left her
sleeping in the wet spot.
She never bothered them again.