Give a Reason
A One-shot Seiya/Usagi
By Rizukiyatchan Kou Irvine
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~The rush and bustle of time is overwhelming
The city it runs through is a savannah
Sure news of an ill change...
When tomorrow comes, everyone will forget.~
No one could forget. It wasn't that very long ago that the fate of the entire
galaxy resting in the hands of a 4'11", 16 year old blonde haired, blue eyed girl
in her first year of high school. Three other girls watched the battle with fear
written all over their faces, especially showing in their eyes. They never took
their gaze away from the blonde and the Senshi she was fighting. The battle
deciding the fate of the universe, Sailormoon versus Sailorgalaxia.
Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, Venus, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Saturn, Chibichibi,
Princess Kakyuu, Tuxedo Kamen. All had fallen due to their own attempts to
fight Galaxia. Whether it was one on one, two on one, four on one. They all
failed. What made this blonde believe she could defeat this Senshi by herself,
when so many behind her had fallen? The three watching her couldn't figure it
out. Well, two of the three couldn't. One could. One with long raven hair and
deep blue eyes.
Some said she confused the image of her Princess with this blonde. Others
said the male persona got to her. Few said she was just crazy trying to
separate this blonde from her fiancee. No one knew the truth but the blonde
herself, but she was a tad slow at getting this. The words, 'I've fallen in love
with you without even realizing it' didn't appear to be strong enough, at the
end, even though her tears at the time made it seem so.
The truth, actually, was that statement itself. This raven tailed girl had fallen
in love with the blonde without even realizing it. Was it the similarities between
her and her own princess? Was it her bright eternal shine? Her power? The
aura around her? No clue. But all that the raven haired girl knew was that she
couldn't stop thinking about her, and the sight of this battle was getting to her.
So many Senshi died right in front of her eyes, her Princess included. The
blonde's starseed had been shattered earlier, and that was also too much to
handle. Adding all the attacks sent at them. The raven tailed girl's ally, the one
with silver hair, attempted to attack this Galaxia earlier. Her attack flew back
and hit the three of them. Two, three shots from Galaxia. From Uranus and
Neptune. More from Galaxia. It was a wonder that they were not already dead.
~I'm living, I'm living right now
Searching for something in such a relationship
As if I were struggling, as if to slip away,
It want to try testing this power.~
Maybe it was the blonde's power and strength that helped them to hang on.
It was weird, unclear, hard to figure out. Suddenly, after who knows how long,
the blonde managed to take a hold of Galaxia's hand. Chaos was terminated
out of Galaxia's body, the sky turned blue again. There were floating starseeds
everywhere, surrounding the two long haired Senshi that floated in the sky.
The three leather clad Senshi stood up in the debris that they were in. It
looked so much different now that there was light. Like.. Safer. More peaceful,
like they no longer had to hide in fear. That was the case indeed, Galaxia
disappeared and the starseeds followed her. At this point the blonde was
surrounded by her Senshi and her fiancee, and the three leather clad Senshi
were face to face with their Princess again.
But that was then and this was now. Returning home was the hardest thing
this leather-clad Senshi could do. Of course she was happy, beyond happy, that
she was back home with her allies and her Princess. The clean-up work was
only starting out but that was alright. That was the least of this girl's problems.
Her main concern was that she screwed up, emotionally. Not exactly the last
thing she said, but one of them, was 'I'll never forget you, Odango.' And that
was a fact. But the girl was too dense to understand it. She didn't hold it
against her, even though she was a tad slow at grasping some things, she still
had a shine like no other.
Everyone noticed this girl's internal struggle with herself. She knew this
Sailormoon would never have the same feelings, and her mind accepted it. Her
heart, on the other hand, did not. Her heart longed just to hear her voice once
again.. Did she even truly fall in love with her? Well... Rumors were all over the
planet already, about that exact question.
~Surely, somewhere lies "the answer,"
the answer to why I was born.
That is what all people wish for,
facing the dreary dream that they can't let go of.~
'She didn't. She just confused the image of the Princess with Sailormoon and
can't get out of it.' A Yaten-influenced rumor.
'She did. She's a lesbian or something. Geez.. Is this the leader of the
Senshi that are supposed to be heirs or whatever?' Mainly anti-Starlight people
came up with that one.
'She is in love with her.' Non-anti-Starlight people believed that one.
'She's just.... Herself. The flirt she'll always be, only was hit head over heels
with this one.' This one came from random people.
She didn't care what the rumors were. The holder of the true answer was
herself. And that answer was a mix of all of them. At first she was just mixed up
between their Princess and Sailormoon, but it later grew into a love that she
didn't know was forming until moments before their final concert on Earth. Oh
how it sucked to realize things when it's too late. If she realized sooner she
could have forced herself to back away, but it was too late. There was no time
to change that. Her boyfriend was dead, she was depressed, her friends, the
world, everything and everyone was dying.. There was no choice but to protect
her. And that simple action caused it to grow.
Was it need? Want? Desire? She didn't even know herself. All she knew was
that she was going in and out of depression stages and she couldn't stop it. By
a late realization of her emotional state, she plummeted into a deep hole she
couldn't crawl out of alone. Whether it be Yaten, Taiki or Kakyuu that had to pull
her out, she didn't know. Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew. None of
them could. Only Tsukino Usagi, Sailormoon, could pull her out of the slum she
was it. And she was off to be married to that man shortly, have a child. That dug
a deeper hole than before.
~I'm not afraid of getting hurt,
but I'm not strong at all.
It's just that I don't want to be regretful,
without doing anything at all
Here we go! go! I'll keep running!
I won't be stopped by anyone.
I want to
give a reason for life to my future self.~
Could people actually be over-analyzing this situation? Maybe. But she was
guilty of that, too. Every night and every morning she would start or end by
wondering what she could have done.. To prevent herself from this state? To
win her heart? Mamoru's cold stare sent at her flashed through her head,
unable to remember the sympathetic look he gave her at the end. He couldn't
be all bad.. Usagi would have never chosen him if he was. But a part of this girl,
a part of Seiya Kou, wanted to strangle him, 'why do you make her so sad?',
scream, yell. But would that be right?
Most likely not, but it would feel right as it was occuring, if it were ever to. Of
course, Seiya would never do this, because she knew, deep inside, that it
would hurt Usagi to do so. They had gone through so much already. But.. Would
she even remember them, now? The crescent moon is visable through an open
window in the dark, night sky. Covers are twisted over a figure that peeks its
head out from underneath and stares out forward, unable to move or speak, or
say even too much..
"..unrequited love.. After everything we've done why do we have to suffer
so much?"
~The huge darkness that knows no scale
makes a sound, and comes toward me.
If someone is with me when the morning is finished,
it would erase the desolation in my heart.~
Morning. Analyzations done. Seiya turned in her bed, pulling the covers up
closer to her face. Her hairtie was rather loose so she had her hair all over her
face and back. She couldn't get to bed till three in the morning, and for another
she fell asleep in a weird position. Taiki and Yaten had to come in after hearing
a crash, which was just Seiya falling off the bed. That was around three thirty.
They put her back in her bed and pulled the covers over her, going back to their
rooms in annoyance and worry. This wasn't the first time Seiya had fallen off
her bed rather hard but wouldn't wake up due to it.
The alarm went off as loud as it could possibly go. Seiya mumbled under her
breath and pulled the covers over her head. Not good enough, she could still
hear the alarm beeping right beside her. Too lazy to roll over, she pulled her
pillow over her head, trying to drown out the annoying sound. it wouldn't go
away. Growling in frustration, Seiya flung forward, her pillow in her hand. She
raised her arm up into the air and swung down, the pillow hitting the clock dead
on, causing it to crash into the floor and go silent. Narrowed eyes stayed fixed
on the silent clock before she grew satisfied and placed her pillow back under
her head, as she closed her eyes again.
As quickly as the beeping sound had gone away, Seiya slipped back into the
world of dreams, not wanting to pull out of it. Maybe there was some meeting
or something that morning, but it would have to go on without her, she was too
drained. A bunch of images filled her head and flew out, illusions and visions
and mere images of wishes and desires.
I make a stronger image,
and my belief in myself
as I smile
comes closer to my dream than anyone or anything.~
A dream..... Seiya's eyes flew open slowly, as she felt herself drifting
downwards slowly, nothing around her to grab a hold of to stop. Her arms
reached up, hands scrambling for something to grab a hold of. It was weird..
She was in her red pajamas still, her hair completly loose now. She started to
fall downward at a faster pace, continuing to look for something to grab a hold
of.
Suddenly, a hand grabbed a hold of her own, keeping her from falling any
further. Seiya blinked, looking up. Her cheeks went bright red and eyes went
wide open. One second ago she was contemplating her past actions, laying on
her bed, now she was in the middle of nowhere, falling, and the one who saved
her was none other than the one she could never ignore. Tsukino Usagi.
"Odango.. How did you.." Seiya shut up quickly once she felt Usagi's finger
over her lips.
"This isn't real, Seiya."
"..yeah. I've come to realize that."
"Seiya.. You've got to know. I'm sorry for hurting you.."
"Hey.." Seiya smiled a bit, trying not to look down below her. "It's not your
fault I'm in an unrequited love. You have your boyf-- fiancee..."
"Seiya.." Usagi breathed, pulling the girl up so they were both face to face.
"I am still sorry."
"You have no reason to be."
"Yes I do." The blonde pulled her closer, staring deep into her midnight blue
eyes. "I never got to say thank you or anything.."
"You never had to."
"Seiyachan.. I don't want you to be sad anymore on my count. I want you to
be happy.." The blonde pulled her closer, holding her in a tight embrace. Seiya
felt at a loss, confused and for some reason rather vulnerable. For once it was
her that sought comfort in the other girl's arms.
'What is she getting at..?' Seiya blinked. "Odango.. What do you mean?"
"Live life like there's no tomorrow, Seiyachan. I'm...."
Seiya's eyes widened as she listened carefully, feeling the other girl's arms
wrapped around her waist.
This time, a different voice could be heard. Instead of the nice tone Usagi's
had, this one had an annoyed one, a rather pissed off tone.
"SEIYA KOU GET UP OFF OF YOUR ASS AND COME DOWNSTAIRS!"
Suddenly, Usagi's image disappeared and Seiya fell back downwards, her
eyes glued on where Usagi once stood. Her body was frozen, she couldn't feel
the nerve to even try to move this time. Her hair flew out, everything was
getting weird, but Seiya still was staring upwards, trying to see if she could
locate Usagi.
...Or the golden band around her finger she was just about to find out
existed.
~I won't stop myself at one goal
because even if I reach it,
a new dream will surely
push me even farther.~
Seiya turned, quickly falling off of her bed. She threw the covers off of her
head, breathing deeply. She raised a hand to her face, wiping the tears off of
her cheeks. The door opened, Yaten and Taiki standing on the other side.
"Seiya.. You just missed the meeting we were supposed to attend," Taiki
whispered. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine.." Seiya breathed, blinking in confusion.
"You don't look fine," Yaten mumbled, bending down next to her. "Another
dream with her?"
"Yeah.."
"Seiya.. when are you going to get over her?" Taiki bent down beside her as
well.
"I think.. I don't think I'm supposed to. I think I'm supposed to remember
Odango, and love her. But obviously everything and everyone is trying to tell me
that she's not the one. Although I'm aware of this.. I won't stop thinking about
her."
~Here we go! go! I'll keep running!
I won't be stopped by anyone.
I want to
give a reason for life to my future self.~
"Why won't you...?"
"Like our Princess, she gives me a reason to wake up in the morning
sometimes. When I don't feel like it, mainly. I don't really think I'm making too
much sense."
"When DO you?"
"ANYWAY. That dream didn't either. I think I get the point of it this time."
"Oh? What was it?"
"She got married since we've been here. She doesn't want me to be upset
over it anymore."
"So.. After all this time of us telling you.. You didn't get it. Some whacked out
dream tells you and you get it?!"
"So are you finally going to be our normal Seiya again?"
Surely, somewhere lies "the answer,"
the answer to why I was born.
That is what all people wish for,
facing the dreary dream that they can't let go of.~
"Yeah... I'm sorry you two." seiya rubbed her forehead, smiling nervously.
She felt Yaten playfully slap her upside the head and Taiki put a hand on her
shoulder.
"Daijoubu. We'll always be here for you. Now, when you're properly dressed,
come downstairs so you can explain your absense, okay?"
Seiya nodded as the two got up and walked out, closing the door behind
them. She got up and tossed the covers back on the bed, sitting down beside
the window. She pushed the curtains aside and looked to the sky, a small smile
on her face.
'It's a new day. It's a new beginning. I'm not going to forget about you,
ever, Odango. Because it's still a galaxy of difference... A one sided love."
~I'm not afraid getting hurt,
but I'm not strong at all.
It's just that I don't want to be regretful,
without doing anything at all.
Here we go! go! I'll keep running!
I won't be stopped by anyone.
I want to
give a reason for life to my future self.~
________________________________________
Author's End-of-the-Fic Notes:
"Give a Reason" is from the Slayers NEXT season. n.n;
This fic was yet another test by me to see what I can do with the coupling. If it's
good enough, I may write a sequel to it. I dunno, let's see what the future
holds!