Title: Namida to Ame
Warnings: AU, Heero's POV, maybe OOC?, 1+2 shonen-ai (slightly), somewhat angsty, and kinda sappy too.
Notes: This is a very wierd story, and it's also a bit of a spin on the theme, so I hope it will be accepted. It was a lot of fun to write. Also, to those who care, there is little to no yaoi here, but please read it anyway, I think it's kinda cool. ^_^ (the title means, 'tears and rain')
Disclaimers: I don't own anybody, just this story. It's original from my wierd little mind. Gundam Wing belongs to Gundam Wing people.
Duo Maxwell appeared to me one day as rain beat down harshly on my unguarded head while I walked alone through soaked streets cradling schoolbooks. I was simply plodding along by myself, looking for a reason not to get drenched in a downpour.
At first sight, I at first took him to be an angel. He was more than beautiful enough. The violet depths of his eyes glistened like subterranean diamonds; his chestnut hair shone independent of the weather around us. And it was like he had an aura about him: strange, ethereal, reverent, magical. His eyes looked into and through me and I couldn't turn away.
Slowly a smile formed on perfect lips, a half smile, quirked as if in its own joke. The majesty surrounding the boy faded as suddenly as he had appeared.
"You're all wet, aren't you?" I jolted at the conversational tone, if not at the very sound of a voice against the backdrop of rain. At first I turned away, being unaccustomed and uninterested in chitchat.
"Going to ignore me, Heero?" That got my attention. How did this stranger know my name? Quickly I displaced with formalities.
"What are you?" He smiled that crooked grin at me again; it was always difficult to get a straight answer from Duo Maxwell. His gaze drifted lazily to the sky and he peered up at the gray rain.
And just like that, he was gone. There was no flash of light or smoke, no bolt of lightning, no magical display of departure at all. I never saw him go just as I hadn't seen him come. I wondered if I hadn't just imagined the entire encounter.
In the days that followed, his memory remained with me. And for the first time in as long as I can remember, I yearned to see another human being again.
There have been many periods of time in my life when the days ran together, rushing onwards toward the future like a river, each one indiscernible from the rest. Time travels at its own pace for the rest of the world, but I haven't been able to muster a twitch at its passing. There have been no great events, no special moments in my life that warrant the distinguished notice others pay to the past, present, or future.
This is why Duo's entrance was of such paramount importance. Suddenly something wonderful, something strange and supernatural had occurred, even if I didn't quite believe it myself. My dreams became filled with images of light and shadow, brilliance and silence, without substance but still to my mind depicting the character of the person with whom I was slowly becoming obsessed.
If it appears this attachment came on far too quickly, the phenomenon was not without my notice. I had always held myself off from people and likewise torn myself away from relationships that sought to become too close. I cannot say for certain why this time and this person were different. I can only report that out of nowhere I had seemingly developed a deep-seated trust with a perfect stranger.
More than a week passed before I saw Duo again. That day, my mind was wandering over the chores I would have to complete upon my return home. Like many days, I was mindlessly plodding along from school, unaware of where I was or who was passing along or across my path.
"Penny for your thoughts, pretty boy?" I looked up. I stood in front of the playground to my old grammar school. The park was empty save for a lean, darkly clad figure perched on a swing.
I watched him absentmindedly swinging from my side of the fence. His eyes, fixed upon my face, twinkled mischievously, the expression echoed against those playful lips. A long, single braid fluttered out behind him, gracefully following his body in motion.
"Come on in Heero and sit with me. I've wanted to see you again." My insides shuddered in anxiety. Though I have not lied about the intensity of my desire to see Duo again, I still felt old danger in friendly words. I kept my expression guarded and my eyes on the smirking, beautiful boy as I entered the playground.
As I came closer, Duo began to laugh. "Really now, Heero. You can trust me. Look, I won't bite." He opened his mouth and pointed at his canines, laughing merrily again. I sat beside him on an adjacent swing.
"Who are you?" I pointedly asked him.
"Oh, excuse me. How very rude! I haven't introduced myself yet, have I?" He stuck out his hand for a shake. I took it. "My name's Duo Maxwell. Nice to meetcha!" I detached my arm from his following mad round of complimentary hand shaking.
"You didn't answer me before," I told him. "What are you?"
For a moment, I could have sworn that the air changed, from something cool and calm to a stuffy miasma of heat and fire. The laughing eyes before me shifted, darkening to cold pools of ebony. But the effect was mysteriously gone in an instant and the air stilled to its previous temperature.
"Now, now, Heero." Duo's mouth quirked again. "Someone like you should understand the need for privacy." I narrowed my eyes at him.
"You act as if you know me, but..."
"But you don't have friends. In fact, I can't say that you love anyone, do you Heero?" I stared at the boy before me, grinning from ear to ear, apparently enjoying my ignorance.
"If you won't tell me who you are, then what do you want from me?" Duo's smile relaxed, his fingers hooking about the chains of the swing, and his neck tilted back to look up into the sky. Eyelashes gently brushed slightly rosy cheeks as his eyes drifted shut. I waited for him to answer me, the wind kissing the bangs to his forehead and toying with the braid at his back.
Again, with his face to the sky, Duo departed from my presence. Again it was without ceremony. Again I was completely sure that the meeting had occurred only in my imagination. But as I peered down at his prior seat, the swing still traveled slightly back and forth with its missing occupant's previous momentum.
I couldn't say how much time passed between then and the next time I saw Duo. It could have been centuries or it could have been hours. Now that I was convinced that Duo was real and not something I had dreamed up, I was thoroughly fixated on him. I tried to imagine how and why he had come by the information that he had on me. I wondered how much Duo did know about me. I didn't know anyone who knew or cared for me enough to pass on to him anything like the things he had said. Who was Duo Maxwell?
I mulled my questions over and over in my head for a long while. I realized that I needed to see him again. And when I thought about seeing him again, and the fact that I didn't know where he was, my chest tightened. A revelation hit me. I was lonely.
I had never bothered with people before. I had never had the need for them. Occasionally I had noted the social habits of the humans about me, but I had never sought to join in their conversations and I had often blown off any attempts others had made to try and engage me. Even my own family back at home had never taken the time to get to know me, or I taken any interest in them. Since I was a little boy to the present, everyone from family to peers to strangers hadn't been important to my life; they had merely existed in my world. I had never thought to care.
I raced for the city. I knew Duo would be there. He would be in the city where there were people, where someone with Duo's unique personality for mirth would be accepted with open arms. My heart jumped at the realization that I would soon be with that beautiful, laughing spirit again. I saw his face before me, the violet eyes smiling, that long, gorgeous hair flowing like molten felicity down his back. I ran faster.
I don't know how I knew where I was going, but I somehow ended up at the right place. I stopped before a Catholic Church, dimly lit from the inside, and stepped inside. I knew he was there immediately, though I can't explain how. I began to call his name, over and over again. The place was vacated; I didn't even see the token priest mingling about, so I was on my own to find him. I don't remember where I finally found him and I'm sure it was hardly any genius of my own that I discovered him. Doubtless, he had found me.
He stood before me in a priest's outfit, his hair done up in the same single braid, looking as if he'd expected me to come all along. I acted on impulse, I suppose because of my happiness at finding him, and threw my arms around him. "I found you!" I told him. I hugged the boy close; I didn't want him to run away again. I didn't feel lonely anymore.
I felt his arms about me, returning a small squeeze back, and then he disengaged himself from my embrace. I looked into his face, silently willing him not to go and leave me alone again, and he smiled his old smile.
"I'm glad to see you too, Heero," he told me. I nodded; it was nice not to have to explain to someone how you felt. But he turned his back on me and walked away. I followed, relieved if anything that he wasn't simply "un-existing" from my sight.
Duo reached behind a stand that looked like a speaking platform and pulled out a long rod of wood. At the end of this rod was a scythe. I looked at him, willing him to tell me what on Earth was the purpose of this weapon. He brushed past me, walking away again.
I followed silently behind him, up stairs, through dark corridors. He never said a word. I knew that eventually he would speak, and as I was a quiet individual myself, I had no problem with patience. I merely watched the braid in front of me with determination; not daring to look to the right or the left for fear that the apparition before me would cease to exist.
We reached the roof and I followed Duo to the edge of it, his scythe still in his hand, and waited beside him while he looked out at the city. But his eyes drifted to the sky again and, in fear that he would leave me, I gripped his arm.
"Please stay," I half asked him, half commanded him. He smiled over at me, removing his gaze from the sky, and he patted the hand on his arm. Contented, I removed my hand and waited for him to speak. He continued to gaze out at the city as a little breeze picked up, whipping the braid at his back playfully. I felt my lips mysteriously quirk at the sight.
"I am glad I chose you." I looked up suddenly, the words having caught me off guard. The look in his eyes was foreign and it alarmed me, but just as in everything about him, the change shifted back to the normal instantaneously.
"Duo?" I prodded gently. His gaze had again returned to the sky and his right hand holding the scythe was toying with the handle. He said nothing.
"Duo?" I asked again, with a little more force. His eyes shifted to me. "Please tell me." He appeared to consider this for a time. Then again he raised his gaze to me. His eyes were beautiful at that instant, deeply violet, as I had first seen them.
"I have come to end this world, Heero. It is time for humans to go, I'm going to destroy them." He gestured with his scythe. "I have been given the power to make that choice." He gestured with his hand to the city below us. "The humans here are of course gone, and many along with them. Others have seen to that. But they can only work in small numbers and..."
"Wait!" I halted him. "What are you saying? How can nobody live in this city anymore? What about me? Aren't I here?"
Duo smiled at me. "You're taking this so well. But oh, poor Heero, so wrapped up in your own life. Haven't you noticed that no one else has been around for weeks now?" I thought for a moment. I hadn't noticed that an entire city had disappeared before my eyes? But I knew it was true, despite the unreality of the situation. I knew it was true with the same certainty that I had known Duo was in this Church when I had arrived.
"You've been living alone for a long time, Heero," Duo told me. "But that is because I allowed you to live. You interest me. I chose you long ago, when you were only an infant, because I knew you would be special now, today. And I protected you, gave you the gift of my kind, so that you would not require love from other humans. But you have grown and I can safely return that debilitation unto you, for you have learned the uselessness of love."
"Duo, you are..."
"Your human world has had many names for my people. The closest name I find that you may understand is 'demon.'"
I understood what Duo was telling me about myself. I had been changed, altered after my birth into something inhuman. Duo had taken my ability to love away from me, afraid that I might hurt myself with that powerful emotion. Now that I was older and reaching adulthood, he returned the part of me that he had taken, feeling that I understood the ecstasy of being a loveless creature enough that I would not put my missing part to any use.
And now there weren't going to be anymore humans. Duo's plan was almost perfect if he wanted a companion. But he'd made one fatal error.
"I haven't been without 'love' long enough apparently," I whispered. I could feel my eyes getting wet and a single tear dribbled down my cheek. At the same instant I realized my love for him, I understood also that he had not the capacity to love me in return.
Duo's gaze turned on me. It wasn't kind any longer. There was fire in those eyes. But I wasn't afraid of the hellish being before me. I couldn't be when at last I'd found something to love.
I sought out Duo's gaze and locked it with my own. I repeated over and over again in my mind how I felt and I knew he heard me. I told myself that I would stay here on this roof for eternity if need be until Duo understood me. There was an infinity again before he at last spoke.
"My Heero, I suppose you think I am beyond reach to you." His beautiful smile radiated the features on his face. He looked human once more. "But I have grown attached to you and that is as close as I can come to your humanity." Lightly he stroked his free hand across my cheek, wiping away the tears there. The hand lingered, and its owner looked at me sadly. "I have to go, Heero. I am sorry to have caused you pain. Please forgive me." He let me go.
I tried to stop him, but his deep violet gaze had already turned from me, shifting again to the sky. He raised his scythe up and it disappeared, his body following closely behind. The last I saw of him was a chestnut braid frolicking in the wind.
I have never seen Duo again, though I often think of him. I wish I could have said goodbye. But then I reason that that wouldn't have been necessary; he always understood what I wanted to say before I recognized my thoughts myself.
It seems that Duo decided to spare my city, and others too. I've finally been able to make some friends around here. It's been difficult; I've only had practice on a demon after all. But I like to think that maybe my humanity rubbed off on Duo. Sometimes I imagine that maybe he's watching me, thinking that he did a good thing to choose me as his friend, and giving me back the part of me he kept safe for so long.