*Author's Note: Eep. Meant to update sooner. Didn't. My apologies. You know how life can be...
Shadow Vitani - Heehee... Freaky! *steals!*
Pharaoh Yami - Heh... I like that scene, too. *laughs at my own joke*
loanshark - All that advice about how to change chapter ordering was great until the part about you just guessing. However, as that option MUST be there for a reason, I'm betting that's right. Oh, and thanks.
Lizzie - Waah, I forgot to give you credit for your joke last chapter! I'm sorry!! Have a cookie! *holds the plate out to her apologetically*
... *looks down at the cookies* *softly* Oh. I get it, now. *sets the plate down and holds up a cookie, in all its chocolatey and vanillay goodness* You miss your Yami, don't you?
*Ay nods, sad and embarrassed.*
*sighs* I'm sorry. I shouldn't be keeping you apart like this. I'll... I'll see what I can do. *turns and leaves, letting the reader go on to the fic**
Joey: Man, I can't believe it's finally happenin'. Yugi vs. Pegasus for his grandpa's soul!
Bakura: *overly innocent* Why would Yugi want Pegasus's grandfather's soul?
Joey: Bakura! Now is not the time for jokes!
Bakura: Best time, if you ask me.
Joey: Everything we've been workin' for comes down to this match!
Téa: "We?" You were fighting for your sister, and I'm just along to get out of school!
Bakura: And I'm just here to... Uhhh... Cheer. Right.
Joey: *not noticing* Yeah, yeah.
Yami Bakura: *thinking* Let's see what Croquet's up to, shall we?
Bakura: *mentally; hopefully* Or we could not. That'd be good, too.
Yami Bakura: *sighs* I should stop talking to myself. It makes you think you're allowed to speak.
Croquet: What? What do you mean, Mokuba's missing? He is instrumental in the plan to take over Kaiba Corp.. Find him immediately, idiot! How hard can it be to recapture a soulless body? Do not make me come down there!
Yami Bakura: *bemused* Do you know, I rather think I like him. I'll have to remember to mangle him as painlessly as possible.
Joey: You got somewhere to go, Bakura?
Yami Bakura: *doing his best Bakura imitation, which basically makes him sound rather strangled* Yes. I thought I'd go and check on Tristan.
Téa: He has been gone a long time.
Joey: *angrily, raising his fists* Too long, if you ask me!
Yami Bakura: *with a hidden smirk* What, are you going to beat me up because Tristan got lost?
Joey: Ah... Gee, I didn't mean it like that... *drops his fists, clearly flustered* Sorry, Bakura.
Yami Bakura: Think nothing of it! *mentally, as himself* These mortals are fun to play, if nothing else.
Pegasus: Goody! Now it's my turn once again.
Téa: Wow. I've never seen a person that celebrated so much every time their opponent played.
Pegasus: *thinking* You see? The Eye never lies. Nor does it fail in sighting the vulnerabilities for your pathetic moves.
Yami: *telepathically* No, no. That's MY job. The Eye can only read minds. It's the Puzzle that grants unbeatable luck in games.
Yami Bakura: *thinking* Where are you, little Mokuba?
Bakura: *unperturbed* May I ask why you're going after him? Does someone older, stronger, and fabulously rich have no appeal to you? If you're going to take over the world, that's not a bad place to start from.
Yami Bakura: *sarcastic* And why are you being so helpful all of a sudden?
Bakura: *shrugs* Bored.
Pegasus: Well, a trap for traps, actually. It's called "Trap Displacement," and with it I can take the Spellbinding Circle you set on one of my monsters and switch it to one of yours! Observe.
Yami: No! Now Ryu-ran's attack points are back to normal and my Summoned Skull's 700 points weaker.
Pegasus: Why, it's almost as if I knew exactly what you were thinking, isn't it?
Yami: Well, I wouldn't go that far. After all, you'd have to be a fool not to play such a powerful card, if you had it and had drawn it.
Yami: No! My Summoned Skull won't be able to last another turn with that Spellbinding Circle entrapping him.
Pegasus: Come now, Yugi-boy, your Skull won't even last this one.
Joey: *pause*
Téa: *pause*
Yami: *seethe*
Joey: Yep, there's really nothin' I can say to beat that.
Yugi: *managing to find yet ANOTHER tone of voice for "angry/sad"* Pegasus know every dueling strategy I think up.
Pegasus: Actually, I know every kind of strategy you think up. Or fail to, as the case may be.
Joey: That mind-reading cheat! What the heck's the use in goin' on?!
Téa: Love of the game? Lack of anything better to do? A few more precious moments living outside of a cheap paper card?
Joey: It was a rhetorical question, Téa.
Joey: It ain't over 'til it's over. We've gotta believe Yugi'll find the way to beat this creep.
Téa: Yeah. I just wish there was more than the one...
Joey: I know. The odds are a bit more than I like. But I thought you were supposed to be the positive one!
Téa: "Supposed to" doesn't mean "am."
Yami Bakura: *chuckles* Lay one hand on the boy and you will rue the day you imbeciles were ever born.
Bakura: *idly twirling a lock of hair* Wouldn't they rue they day you were born -- or better yet, imprisoned?
Yami Bakura: *mentally* No, that would require more intelligence than granted them and their entire line.
Bakura: Seems a bit contradictory to the complexity of your language, if you ask me.
Guard: Step out of those shadows right now!
Yami Bakura: *lounges against a wall* Your entire castle is built out of shadow. If you can't see an albino, that's your problem, not mine.
Tristan: Run for it, Bakura! Go on, save yourself!
Yami Bakura: Believe me, were I in any risk, that is exactly what I would be doing.
Tristan: What? Bakura? You're even more pathetic than Yugi! He might not know how to throw a punch, but his falling unconscious on the ground usually provides a distraction for a few seconds, at least...
Guard: Step outta those shadows, or else!
Yami Bakura: Or else you'll do what, you pathetic little drones?
Guard 2: Uhh... That's a good question, actually... We don't really have the numbers advantage anymore.
Guard: ... *with dawning recognition* In fact, one might even say we're outnumbered.
Guard 2: Oh! Yeah! There's no way we could beat them!
Guard: Guess we'll just have to make a strategic withdrawal!
*The guards beat a hasty retreat.*
Yami Bakura: Chain Energy!
Guard: What on Earth? I'm stuck!
Tristan: *rather startled by the whole affair* I don't think the Earth has anything to do with it.
Guard: Hey, stop!
Guard 2: Halt!
Guard: Hey, those brats are getting away!
Guard 2: I can see that, moron.
Guard: Shouldn't we be chasing them? Only our arms are bound.
Guard 2: Do YOU want to follow them?
Guard: Well, no.
Guard 2: Then I say we pretend they are.
Guard: *relieved* Good idea!
Pegasus: But even without my Millennium Magic, you're no match for me. After all, who needs magic with this card? *pulls out Toon World*
Yami: Against Kaiba? No-one. Against me? You and everyone else.
Pegasus: Perhaps you'll remember it. *holds it up* That's right, Yugi. It's the magical Toon World!
Yami: I thought as much.
Pegasus: As you recall, Toon World protects my monsters beneath its impenetrable hardback bindings. Bindings that they'll only vacate when they're about to attack you!
Yami: Yes, I do remember this, as you must know. Why do you repeat it?
Pegasus: Ahh, can I help it if I admire the sound of my own fine voice?
Pegasus: And seeing how all my monsters have been transformed to their super-powered Toon form, it will be an attack that's certain to leave you in stitches!
Yami: Oh, a pun. How delightful.
Pegasus: What's the matter, Yugi-boy? Don't you have a sense of humor?
Yami: Not one that's recognized by today's standards, no.
Pegasus: Manga Ryu-ran! Attack the monster Yugi has in Defensive Mode. Nasty Nostril Flame Attack!
*The Stone Soldier incinerated, Ryu-ran leans over to taunt and mock. Yami promptly punches him on the nose.*
Pegasus: Aren't my Toons simply marvelous? I can't help but feel the same proud satisfaction that a parent would.
Téa: Oh, so that's why he does it! It's a substitute for not having been able to raise a family with his wife!
Pegasus: *flaring to anger* Keep your nose in your own business, little girl!
Téa: *smugly* Ooh, I hit a sore spot. Guess I was right, then.
Yugi: If I keep throwing my monsters in Defensive Mode, Pegasus's Toons will just keep picking them off. My only chance is take the offensive. Maybe by attacking, I can uncover some kind of weakness in these Toon monsters.
Yami: *mentally* Lovely way to throw some points, too.
Yami: Go, Celtic Guardian! Silverblade Slash! *he does so, but...* No way! The clam caught my attack!
Téa: I hate to say it, Yugi, but you really should have been expecting something like this, after Kaiba's duel with Pegasus. If a Toon Blue-Eyes can beat a real one, what chance did your Guardian have?
Pegasus: Yugi's Guardian is the catch of the day! *laughs* And if there's one thing I love -- besides winning, that is -- it's a fish fry!
Téa: *drolly* Guess we know what to do for Pegasus's birthday, then.
Joey: What, fry him up?
Téa: Uh... Well, that works, too.
Téa: That was no draw!
Joey: Obviously.
Yugi: *panicking* Okay, well, maybe if I play a stronger card.
Pegasus: Afraid not. No card in your deck is strong enough. My Toon Monsters can't be beaten by sheer brute force.
Yami: *far calmer than his hapless aibou* Now wasn't that easy? Thank you!
Yami: I'm throwing a monster in Defense Mode.
Pegasus: I knew you would, Yugi-boy.
Yami: Agh, I hate being so predictable. It's one thing when he reads my mind, but quite another when he guesses to choose what to play.
Yami: My Imp! He's been turned to stone!
Téa: *scratches head* I'm not sure how he can tell that by just seeing it go grey-scale.
Pegasus: Sorry. But there is a bright side to having a set of fossilized monsters, Yugi-boy. They make fine paperweights! *laughs, but alone* ... Hmm. Tough crowd.
Téa: No, bad joke.
Joey: If you hadn't just explained about the effect of destroyin' 'em, then maybe.
Téa: But basically, bad joke.
Pegasus: Maybe you can learn to lighten up from my second face-down card.
Yugi: *mentally rolls his eyes* Good luck! I've been trying to get him to do that for ages now!
*Yugi gets whacked by his aibou.*
Pegasus: This little rascal can transform himself into any card on the field that I want. *Doppelganger twines itself around him* Oh, beg your pardon, any card that he wants.
Téa: *flabbergasted* But he... the arena... and the hologram... it... not... what?
Joey: Gotta hand it to Kaiba, he sure does illogical work!
Pegasus: Well, Yugi-boy, it seems that he would like to transform into that Summoned Skull that I defeated a few turns ago.
Yami: My Skull? He's in my graveyard!
Pegasus: Ah, yes, but isn't that the beauty of such un-dead monsters? Un-dead once, un-dead always, if you know what I mean.
Yami: You're twisted, Pegasus. You take such delight in creating such a monstrosity.
Yugi: So... American...
Yami: So... modern...
*They both shudder.*
Pegasus: Don't say that! You'll hurt its feelings. You may not know it, but beneath that gruff exterior lies a very sensitive Toon.
*The Toon Skull flirts outrageously with Yami, forcing him to turn away, looking distinctly green.*
Téa: *horrified* I can't believe Kaiba would program something like that!
Pegasus: I see you've drawn the fabled Dark Magician.
Yami: Anh!
Pegasus: What? Still shocked? *shakes head sadly* And here I thought you were beginning to catch on...
Pegasus: Your favorite card, if I'm not mistaken. His trouncing should be especially painful for you. I so look forward to when you put him into play, Yugi-boy. *thinking* And I can crush him.
Yami: *using his own mind-reading that we all know and love* Why not say that out loud? We all know you want to -- and can.
Pegasus: Ah, but bragging is so unseemly.
Tristan: *panting* Hey, Bakura... what was it... you did back there? Using that magic card... but for real.
Yami Bakura: *keeping stride up the stairs behind him* Not now. Those guards are still behind us.
Tristan: Hey, but... you aren't... even panting. You should be able... to talk fine!
Yami Bakura: Alright, then. Not ever. I've no need to explain myself to you.
Tristan: It's a no-go. This door's locked. Come on! *turns and runs off*
Yami Bakura: *stays behind for a moment and magically opens the door with a flick of his hand. Sees a neon sign at the far end.* Hmm. "Exit." *pauses, then shrugs* But hell. This is almost amusing. *strides off after Tristan*
Tristan: Look! A way out! *promptly runs out and over the edge*
Yami Bakura: *watches him fall from the safety of the doorway* If there's one thing I've learned in all my years, it is to never run into the light.
Tristan: I owe you one, Bakura.
Yami Bakura: Obviously. And be sure to mention that to Yugi when we get back.
Yugi: *sighs* It all just seems so hopeless.
Pegasus: It certainly does. *Yami growls* Oh, sorry, were you having a private conversation with yourself? I keep forgetting you're schizophrenic.
Joey: Don't you listen to 'im, Yuge. Remember everything at stake here: Your grandpa, Mokuba, Kaiba.
Yami: Kaiba? Why do you keep including him, but not me? You think I care more for my would-be murderer than my own soul?
Joey: Er, well, it just sounds less selfish that way.
Yami: The moment I care about that, I'll tell you.
Tristan: Well, seeing as how jumpin's out of the question, I'd say we're as good as caught. ... *pause* ... Bakura?
Yami Bakura: *twitching spasmodically* I'm only going to tell you this once -- NEVER say such things in my hearing. EVER.
Bakura: *pounding his fists against his soulroom wall* DAMN YOU, YAMI! LET ME OUT!!!
Yami Bakura: *shouts mentally, annoyed* YOU CAN KILL YOURSELF IN A FEW MINUTES, YOU... You... JUST SHUT UP!!! Your wimpiness is rubbing off on me!
Tristan: Well, we tried.
Yami Bakura: What do you mean, "we tried?" We are not captured just yet.
Tristan: What are you talkin' about? We're totally out-manned!
Yami Bakura: Do you modern-day simpletons know nothing of battle? We have the high-ground. They can only come at us two at a time, so if you would put the youngling down, we could easily take them.
Yami Bakura: We won't be after I enlist some help from the Shadow Realm.
Tristan: Huh? The Shadow Realm? This can't be good.
Yami Bakura: And now you know how we felt during last night's escapade!