LONELY HEARTS

sent in by Billy Dack

Anyone who has ever felt the need to reply to a lonely-hearts advert in a newspaper should take heed of this alluring come-on that appeared in the Atlanta Journal

“Single black female seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I’m a very good-looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pick-up truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cosy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I’ll be at the front door when you get home weay from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I’m yours. Call (then the phone number) and ask for Daisy.”

Tempted? Well, you aren’t alone. Apparently 15,000 men phoned the number. They found themselves talking to the Atlantic Humane Society about Daisy, an eight-week-old black Labrador puppy.