-{H}{E}{L}{L}{O}-
"God creates human beings to live and breathe within communities of fellow human beings.
He knows that what's best about us cannot manifest itself in a vacuum.
We need others to bring out the best in us."
Thanks to all those do just that....believe in me and make me want to be the best I can.
[ name: chu li shi
[ age: driveable age; doesn't mean i can though...
[ location: vancity...on da west side
[ ethnicity: 100% chinese born in da Phils
[ mood: touched by the care and thoughfulness of some people in my life. sooooo thankful for these friends, they are amazing!
...but still like a rollercoaster.
[ status: waiting...God's got the pen. =)
[ belief: John 3:16 --> "for God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life"
[ church: FEC (Fujian Evangelical Church)
[ delights: being & talking with God| surrounded by nature| watching sunset, water, mountains, etc| being with friends| phone| icq| eating food| making, preparing food| reading| listening to music| rock climbing| skating| cars| sports| outdoorsy stuff (hiking, canoeing, kayaking)| laughing| sleeping|[ thoughts:
may.23.2001
Hello there to everyone. Whoa, I cannot believe I`m actually changing this (just a lil bit though). There`s only 19 more days of school left till summer!!!! Woohoooo! Yah yah, so I`m counting down, I`m excited!!! Hmmm, don`t know why though, I still have summer school but it`s just in the morning so no lunch at school....guess that`s a good thing. Jah, icky cafeteria with all the flies.... Aye, I think we just had the two hottest days so far thisyear! But at least the sun is out so I`m usually more happy now in school...haha well sorta. Haha, nothing much that`s new here, just me babbling on.
july.5.2001
Hehe, trying to avoid doing my hw again! Yikes, well I only have 3 more days of summer school left!!!! Oh well, I didn’t really mind it much it was actually even fun at times. Hmm, let’s see what’s going on lately…haha TONS! First of all, WE’RE ON FIRE!!! That’s probably the best thing that’s happened for sure. Summer camp was last week and it was awesome! (especially the FOOD!!!) haha, you all know how much I ate, eeks. Hehe, our skits…I’ll never forget those. Sambuh with her Lucas impersonation and my bro’s pole dancing!! Haha, hilarious stuff. Hmm, badminton coming up…hehe too bad all the teams are changed so no one can defend their title!! Well guess that’s all for now then.
sept.30.2001Hem, let`s see what`s been going on? Sigh, well school started. Still don`t like it much... =( Oh well I`ll live. Sigh but I guess mostly I`d rather that I actually LIKE living my daily life (mostly consists of school and school related stuff). Aiya, then i`d probably be able to work better and stuff. Haha I think way too much!! Hmmm, I think that is probably why ittakes me so long todo stuff.
haha see, there I go thinking about thinkin...
Hmm let`s see, besides school....fellowship is going pretty good. Yikes, had our first meeting with new positions. Haha don`t think i did too well.... We sure got some cool programs going on though. If anyone reading this and curious...scroll down the page and click on the Youth Fellowship Website link.
What else is going on...haha oh my latest online craze is forums. Just discovered them and they are great for getting some great opinions and meet some new friends interested in the same things!! Ack, well i gotta be going to sleep...sigh, it`s a Monday tomorrow which means another new week of school...though only four days and then a four-day weekend!!!! Woohooooo! Good nite.
feb.27.2002
Hmm, I should be studying for my big physics test right now. Aiya too bummed out. Agh!!! School is really getting to me right now. Sigh, seems so pointless. Then there`s course planning tomorrow too...I have no idea what i even want to go into so how am i supposed to know which courses would be best to take? I have no clue!
Ahhh, can`t wait for Spring Break. But then again, that`s only for a week. Haha, kay i`m not in the best mood right now. Studied so hard yesterday for Chem...haha probably more than i`ve ever really studied for practically any test so all ready proud of myself for that. But then no break before Physics...Ahh this is all too much for me!!!!
There`s so many other things I would much rather be doing! And besides, those other things seem much more important. Know how people say that to find out what is really important in life, just think about the things you would do if you found out if you only had like a month or something less to live? Well one thing I sure wouldn`t do is go to school and stuff...(haha not to discouraged people from school and stuff or anything b/c it is really important but since I have no clue what i`m going to go into, there doesn`t seem to be much of a point for me right now. Don`t know what i`m really striving for. Jaahhh...haha besides, this is just my way of arguing with myself so I can justify not doing homework or whatever) haha.
Things changing a lot in life right now....hmmm, I`m changing a lot right now. Guess i`m just trying to find out who I am on my own. Been the person who people think I am for much too long I think. Ever feel confined? Don`t know...just feel like everything and everyone around me are putting all these boundaries on me that I can`t get out of....
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
-Jeremiah 29:11
Haha, I think I might have sounded a bit hopeless and stuff but in the end I know that God has a plan and I just need to trust him. What he has planned for me is better than anything i can ever ever dream up. It`ll be better than my lil fairy tale dreams. =)
I think I`ll end off with that before I start rambling on again, haha. Gotta resume studying for Physics...sigh. Haha, i`m groaning...always groaning...........but with hope...hope in God! =)
apr.3.2001
Sigh, physics test tomorrow! ahhhhh! Haha, seems like I'm always on when I have a Physics test. Well, just taking a break. It was such a gorgeous day today! Agh, but I hear it's supposed to rain again tomorrow. The sun makes everything seems so much brighter and happier. =) Hehe, I long for summer to get here...
I miss not having school! Spring break definitely was not long enough....neither was Easter break. Aye well, it sure was a nice rest away from school. Man, but my next pro-d day is still a month away!!!! May 6...ahhh too far!
Oh, I can't wait till next month! Some of my aunts and uncles and cousins are coming from the Phils!!!! Hoping I'll be able to go to Whistler with them...it'd be for the whole weekend...that would be so awesome! Woohoooo! I love my cousins. =) Awww they ALL live in the Phils though...I sure wish I could go back and visit them more often. I've only been back once for all the (almost) 12 years I've been in Canada. =( That is much too little!
Aye, guess I better be getting back to Physics....ahhh I want to get away from eveything. Hmmm, why is it not possible to just BE. Be nothing...just be. Well that something I'm still pondering over. Hmmm, think I'll ever find the answers to all my questions? hehe, probably not eh?
apr.9.2002
I love daylight savings!!! Get so much more sun during the day! The last few days have just been gorgeous. It was actually cloudy today but hopefully not for too long.
I got my b`day present today from my parents! okay so my b`day is still two months away but it was on sale so we had to buy it right away. Anyways it`s the coolest chair ever. So comfy. I can curl up and fit right inside! Perfect for reading.
Speaking of reading...I`m in the middle of reading two books right now. The first one is by Dr. Larry Crabb, "Inside Out". Amazing eye opening book. It addresses the exact questions and thoughts that I`ve been contemplating bout lately.
The other book I`m in the middle of reading is "Boy Meets Girl" by Joshua Harris. It`s the second book after "I Kissed Dating Goodbye". These are awesome books! I would recommend EVERYONE to read these books. (*side note: Joshua Harris does not totally condemn dating. he makes it very clear in "Boy Meets Girl" that dating and courtship are just terms. he happens to like what courtship implies more so that`s what he uses but it is possible to date honourably and court sinfully so it`s not the terms that matter. don`t judge a book by it`s title!) I`m not saying that everyone should agree w/ everything he says in the book (and neither does he) but the thoughtsand ideas he presents about what love is and how we should relate to others, not just as couples but as friends too is such a better way to live than what we see in this world now.
Haha, I would be willing to pay (kinda broke but I`d be willing for $20/book) people to read these books. That`s how good i think they are! Hehe, anyone want to take me up on this offer...just let me know! =) But honestly, they will change the way you interact and perceive ppl...if not, it`ll at least give you some good food for thought.
apr.13.2002
God is amazing! I've find that it is impossible to refute the possibility that there is a God. Not only that but that there is a God who loves us and cares for us enough to bother with our everday lives. There's just too many coincidences for them to just be coincidences. Haha, that's the way it's been this past week! Amazing really. Ever since Sunday, the things that have come up (like a few times everyday)...all enhance and build on each other. That is just impossible for it all to be pure chance!
So what is it that I've learned this week? Be real. Expect others to be real and nothing more than that. Then embrace them, accept them love them for all their flaws. Which also means that you can't just ignore their flaws and pretend it's not there b/c then you not loving them for who they really are. Also, the extent of love goes much further than I had ever thought. The command to love God and love others has taken on a whole new meaning for me.
apr.20.2002
People amaze me! I have such great friends. Wow, they`re all so caring. I love being able to talk with them and be with them. Know how there are just some people where when you`re around them, they just such wonderful people that you can`t help but be happy. =) Hmm, I love late night talks with people. Haha, staying up late gives you the chance to talk w/ people w/o tons of interruptions. Haha, it`s given me the chance to get to know all those people who always up late too...hehe which in most other cases I wouldn`t be able to get to know them too well.
Hmm, I only wish things could be all about simple friendship full of love and care. Why do some people go and take the tiniest things and blow them way out of proportion? Sigh, I sure wish everyone could just get along. Aye well, hopefully just b/c the number of friends are more, it won`t mean that things need to get all messed up. Sigh, I hate feeling as if I need to choose b/w friends. Love em all the same....! They`re all such awesome people...amazing people. Hehe, I`m back where I started.
Mmm, been staying up late too much this past week. Better get some sleep tonight. 'Till next time then.
apr.21.2002| 6:48pm
will i ever find my place...a place where i don`t feel out of place but belong and don`t mess things up all the time?....sigh, maybe one day...
...why not? it's in good hands. perfect hands that have the scars that prove just how much he loves us. if he willing to do all that for us, imagine how wonderful his embrace would be. let's run into his capable hands.
...feelings are fickle, it's what you know in your heart that sees you thru in the end.
apr.29.2002| 4:31pm
Another beatiful sunny day. For some reason I'm not that tired at the moment. Haha, though I did almost fall asleep during chem! Psyc project went pretty well even though it ended up that I did the exact same movie as another group. I think mine was better though. ;) 34 more days of school left!!! A month and a half! Agh, can't wait until the summer! Haha, counted that up in Math today. Started our geometry unit so the teacher gave us notes on the names of different angles, geometry symbols...perfect time to update my agenda and count the # of days left of school. Spanish...ahh Spanish, what can I say? It was boring as usual, hehe. But it was great to have the sun shining right on me (didn't know paper could be so bliniding!).
Had a pretty good weekend. Ugh, kind of sick after the ride home from BCIT but choir lifted my spirits. Hilarious. Such cool people in there. Fellowship was great too...well generally for me that is. Singspiration was surprisingly awesome that night. Perfect songs were chosen so many "God-moments". Haha, God has a great sense of humour, we have lots of inside jokes, He and I that is! =) I was just really happy that night...and there were others who seemed real happy too. That just made my heart ecstatic. Makes me real happy to see others happy too.
may.01.2002| 12:26am
I know, I know, I shouldn't be up and online at this time, hehe. Aiya just got stuff on my mind again.
Sigh, why do things have to get so complicated at times. Why is it soooo horribly hard for me to become good friends with people....and even harder to keep them as good friends. I wonder, is it always going to be like this? I'm extremely grateful and touched by those friends who care bout me. They are such amazing people and love em lots...but what if it ends up as usual? I don't ever want to hurt them in the slightest bit or cause them anything but happiness. They deserve that, they are such awesome people! I just pray that I would be able to be just as good friends to them as they are to me. Aye, but seem to be drifting too much from others...so much that it to the point where things are weird...awkward even. Sigh, guess I just got to put it into the Lord's hands. There's not too much I can do at the moment.
Hehe, that above paragraph would be the main load on my "train" at the present moment. Haha, and it doesn't seem to be stopping anytime soon, just keeps going and going and going. (wow, I sound like an Energizer Bunny commercial! haha)
may.06.2002| 11:46pm
Happy Birthday to my bro! =) Finally a teen! (agh, which meant expensive gift for us hehe)
Man, absolutely awesome weekend! Had my cousins over from the Phils...they are soooo much fun to be around! I was always laughing and happy w/ them around. Always something going on hehe. Plus some interesting conversations...haha especially about their boyfriend and girlfriends! Haha and learning to tie a cherry stem w/ your tongue! Sigh, I'm going to miss them tons. I sure wish they lived here. Well, they're leaving for Banff tomorrow and then I'll be able to see them one last time on Friday. They will then go on the Alaskan cruise (...wish anything i could go too....). Anyways...unfortunately, the cruise doesn't come back to Vancouver so they're just going to take the flight home from where they get off. Mmmmmm, awesome though...absolutely awesome having them around. =)
>currently playing: Jake
>currently reading: Dr. Larry Crabb - Inside Out
Allergies are killing me! Non-stop sniffling all day long and I've blown my nose so many times it's getting raw! =( Aye, well at least it's another wonderfully sunny day!
I went to PNE yesterday for Physics...of which i did none of...(oops!). I went on all the rides (excluding the ones where you need to pay more) except the hellevator. We were going to go on at the end but they'd closed it by then. Haha, my goodnes, I actually went on all the freakiest rides. My stomach got a intense lesson on how to float! Haha, I was also the entertainment for my friends. They couldn't stop laughing at me cuz of how scared and tense I was when on the rides. Oh oh!!!! When we were at PNE, there were tv people there and I found out today that my friend and I got on tv last night! Haha, that's so cool! Too bad I didn't watch the news last night hehe. Oh and one of the best parts of going to Playland was that i got to have my churros and cotton candy! =) Woohoooo! That totally made my day. I LOVE churros! I always, always need to buy churros at PNE b/c that's practically the only place I can get them! =)
[ songs of the moment: mary mary - can`t give up now| nicole kidman - one day i`ll fly away| point of grace - he sends his love| rebecca st. james - wait for me| jake - the one| eric & leslie ludy - faithfully
"...hehe, maybe i'm the one who's unstable??..."
