Standards
1.The
community recognizes the phrase "Safe Sane Consensual" as
the best brief summary of principles guiding our sexual expression.
A. "Safe" is being knowledgeable about the techniques and
safety concerns involved in what you are doing. Each participant
must be informed about the possible risks, both mental and
physical.
B."Sane" is knowing the difference between fantasy and reality.
Knowledgeable consent cannot be given if you are under the
influence of drugs or alcohol.
C."Consensual" is respecting the limits imposed by each participant.
One of the most easily recognized ways to maintain limits
is through a "safeword" - which ensures the bottom/submissive
can end the activity at any time with a single word or gesture.
2.These
Standards & Guidelines only pertain to sexual expression between
consenting adults. Children (anyone under 18) cannot give
knowledgeable consent, and sexual acts between adults and
children are illegal and cannot be condoned by the community.
3.Threats
are not safe, sane or consensual. Threats can include actions
or warnings that your property will be destroyed, or your
children and pets will be hurt, or your partner threatens
to kill you or commit suicide if you leave, or you are blackmailed
or outed because of your involvement in diverse sexual practices.
4.Isolation
and/or being prevented from retaining employment or obtaining
higher education is not safe, sane or consensual. Emotions
must be respected, including feelings of jealousy or dissatisfaction,
and responsibility for what happens must be accepted and shared
by each participant.
Guidelines
1.Use
a safeword in order to make participants responsible to themselves
and others.
2.Use
negotiation, which often involves complex, lengthy communication,
in order to make participants aware of each other's limits,
needs and desires.
3.Do
not use scenes to express anger or frustration, or to manipulate
or give unwanted punishment to one of the participants.
If you say no to any of the following questions, you may
be suffering abuse:
1.
Is your consent asked for or given?
2.
Are you able to withdraw consent and stop what's happening
at any time?
3.
Are your needs and limits respected at all times?
4.
Do you feel good after a scene?
5.
Can you function in everyday life?
6.
Can you refuse to do illegal activities?
7.
Can you go wherever you want, whenever you want to?
8.
Is your relationship built on honesty, trust and respect?
9.
Can you insist on safe sex practices?
10.
Are you able to express feelings of guilt or jealousy or
unhappiness?
11.
Do you feel free to talk to your family and friends whenever
you choose?