WITTY, CHEEK AND OHNO TAKE HOME OLYMPIC MEDALS FOR FUNNIEST NAMES Salt Lake Games Set Records For Funniest-Named Olympic Athletes Ever Speed skaters Chris Witty, Joey Cheek and Apolo Ohno were big winners Monday night at the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City, Utah, with all three taking home medals for having the funniest names in the Olympics. In an upset, Witty won the gold medal for the funniest name, with Cheek taking the silver and Ohno -- whom many had felt had the most laugh-out-loud funny name in the Olympics this year -- garnering the bronze. Unlike the figure skating competition, the funniest-name event was free of scandal. “We believe that the person with the most side-splitting name won,” said the contest’s French judge, Jean-Louis Douchebague. The funniest-name event dates back to the 1956 Melbourne Olympics, in which the gold medal for funniest name went to Swedish skier Lars Lardass Lardassen. Apolo Ohno had been expected by many to win the gold not only because of his hilarious last name, but also because of the funny spelling of his first name. Ohno’s first name is usually spelled “Apollo” rather than the goofier, totally inexplicable “Apolo,” a fact that caused many judges to consider his name a double-howler. But judges pointed out that the event should be judged according to which athlete actually had the funniest name, not the name with the funniest spelling. “Funny spelling should not in any way be a consideration in this competition,” said Russian judge Vladimir Jerkoffsky. Ohno is already in training for the next Olympics, with his coaches advising him to change his name to “Apolo OhnoohnoohnoImgonnacrashintothatotherskater.”