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Go here in case you're wondering how I've been doing
January 27, 2002, 7:25 AM:
January 26, 2002, 10:10 AM:
December 31, 2001, 3:07 AM:
December 28, 2001, 2:00 AM:
December 21, 2001, 12:15 AM:
A few good works of original poetry
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Email: dobar@angelfire.com
CANCER SUCKS!
(you'd be saying this if you have/had it too)
Guess who's going back on dialysis soon? Unfortunately that would be me. At least the catheter will be in my neck this time, that way I can do some walking around in the room. Not much else new besides the fact that I think I finally popped and drained out a big ass blister on my right heel. I think I'll share more happenings from since new years: sometimes, mainly on weekends if the weather's bad enough outside, I'll think I'm in another room. Speaking of delusions, sleep deprivation had gotten the best of me, and I'd see and hear people and things in the room when they're not actually there. Crazy, huh?
It's been awhile since I updated, so I figured while I clear some stuff off this site I'd tell you what's been going on in my life so far this year. On New Year's Day I almost literally died awaiting a bronchoscopy(sp?). My mouth had gone so dry I could barely breathe (damn hepafilters) and not being able to eat or drink anything after midnight didn't help either. So after the bronchoscopy they put me on a ventilator for a few days, which I don't remember. I eventually woke up to find myself in a hospital gown and sporting a catheter where it shouldn't be placed (it was pulled out after a day only to be jammed back in for at least another day), and based on that experience I would say pissing in a funny-looking bucket (standing up and/or in bed) is alot more fun. Over the following week or so I gradually went back to wearing pajama pants, boxers, socks, and a short-sleeve shirt. The pants and boxers were a real pain since I'd bloated up so much from the fluids they put through my body. Before long I was put on dialysis, so I had to go back to hospital gowns. Fortunately the dialysis only lasted a few days, though to this very day I'm still wearing a hospital gown. I guess they don't want me to make anymore of a mess of myself than I already have. This week I've begun walking again; it sucks walking w/ blisters and what-not, but I've gotta start eventually. If I'm lucky I'll be outta here w/in a matter of weeks, though I'll to stay in Birmingham for a few more months for follow-up appointments. Well I best be leaving before I doze off for good.
I just had a breathing monitor on my finger removed, so that should make typing MUCH easier now(too bad I'm blind as a bat right now :( ). Well I did wanna keep it short and sweet anyway, so here goes: the morphine I'm on is highly overrated very handy when you need it most. Also, I continue to get my ass kicked by fevers regularly. I think I'll finally have that beat tomorrow, if not soon :)
My drugged-up ass has been meaning to make an update since X-Mas, when I'd begun to feel well enough again to go on the computer. I'll keep this short and sweet, knowing I won't last long under the sedation of morphine. I started it around noon today, my pains in various (some unmentionable) places of my body too much to bear. So far the most this 'wonder drug' has done is put me to sleep; I guess it takes awhile for the morphine to actually begin killing much pain. Also today, I broke a non-vomiting streak I'd had over the last day or two now that I'm on morphine. The highlight of the night was the removal of my right Hickan catheter. It didn't hurt at all since it just had to be pulled out. Well, the morphine once again beckons me to sleep, so ZzZ...
Earlier today I underwent a bone marrow transplant. There wasn't much to it, at least not to me; before the transplant I was given premeds that made me vomit up a biscuit and whatever liquids I had in my stomach at the time. After a second set of premeds, I drifted in and outta sleep throughout the whole thing as well as for about 6 hours afterward. My mom and stepdad watched on in tears as I was receiving my transplant (I was too, but only because I'd puked from the premeds). Right now I'm wide awake and feeling fine, with the execption of the pain from the skin inside my mouth deteriorating from the chemo I'd gotten the week leading up to the transplant.
And speaking of the transplant, some ppl are under the impression that getting a bone marrow transplant means undergoing surgery. Just to clear the air w/ everyone, though I underwent surgery to have two catheters put in my chest, the bone marrow transplant itself did not involve surgery, and in fact it's more like a bone marrow transfusion, if anything, since it just runs through your bloodstream as if you were getting a blood transfusion, IV fluids, drugs, etc.
Well I haven't got much else new to report for now...goodnight everyone!(er, good morning - technically it's after midnight)
(not by me, though)
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