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Meditations: Poetry by Joseph Lowery

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Well, i promised you some NightShyft originals so here they are. Living nowhere -------------- living elsewhere i am all alone used up and missled somewhere i went wrong i'm living here feeling nothing wasted all away i am all alone killing me breaking apart feel it all washing away nothing now i am all alone living there alone in my heart alone in my head somewhere i died living elsewhere feeling lost i am all alone


wating away ------------ breathing in to exhale feeling it all fade losing my mind wasting away i can remember maybe i can't feeling it go floating away losing my grip can't hear to hold falling deep flooding my mind wasting my mind losing my mind now i'm slipping i'm nothing now my mind is gone my life is gone now i'm free free to be wasting away wasting away now i hear voice so faint calling to this newborn saint here i am lost again drowning in my own sin floating away can't hold on griped to slip falling away going away wasting away
nothing to behold ------------------- purify my internal life no one sees at all hiding behind these closed doors of my life looking out of these clod windows seeing you as you were knowing now what i've found is nothing to behold ever changing faces never changing souls were all the same as we once were nothing but a mask we present our world and no one sees who we are but we never change we never change show us your mask to cast aside who you really are looking out your window on a cold cruel world i feel your sorrow but i don't condone them your nothing to behold break your maks to free yourself although mine fits well feeling safe in the dark looking at other people thinking what a shame looking in the mirror i've found nothing to behold.
shroud ------ i am wrapped in shadows bound by chains feeling lonely now i see you walking a little slowly coming my way i am wrapped in my shroud waiting for your kiss knowing it will pass nothing ever last forever nothing ever seems to die going on in circles casting shroud after shroud aside wrapped in delusions bound by pain i feel you near wrapped in this dark veil refusing to see what your doing to me waiting alone in the dark casting you aside i can breathe a little better breaking these chains of mine.
let it come ------------ caring for little wanting even less never knowing how im suppressed feeling down i'm so depressed needing little and getting less i feel catch 22 suicidal losing my own heading to the final show slipping a little farther away carry me along dropping me every step never seeing what's coming next blinded by your light leaving me in the dark wanting to see and only seeing shrouds how can i know what's coming now let it come i don't care let it come.
Last goodbyes ------------- secretly contemplating my own demise walking ever closer to that white light come what may come what might these are my last goodbyes see you there on the other side where ever that might be if it's even there i don't really even care these are my las good byes wishing this one last wish to see you one last time but it'll never come true i'll see you in the light these are my last goodbyes i loved you all that i could love you each and every one of you time to cast off this mask and show myself one last time gathering my reasons my shroud my everything these are my last goodbyes here i stand naked to all your persecutions breaking my skin peircing my heart here i am mask aside taking it all and dying inside see you on the other side goodbye.
sunny day ------------ and the warm sun rose on a typical sunny day right before the clouds began to show the light could light my way i could feel the warmth on a typical sunny day and with it came all the same that i was use to but then came the summer storms lighting shows the thunder rolls bring it on add the tolls let it fall let it pour bring it on let it be one and for all bring it on let the rain cool it down baby let it cool down and the mist began to clear and the air was all sweet on a typical sunny day you came crashing to my feet and with you came all the same that i was use to with you came the summer storms lightning shows the thunder rolls bring it on add the tolls let it fall let it pour bring it on let it be one and for all bring it on it's time for me to leave leave you behind me on a typical sunny day all was all behind me and the sun began to set and the moon began to rise and with it came all the same that i was use to with it came the summer storms lightning shows the thunder rolls bring it on add the tolls let it fall let it pour bring it on let it be one and for all and all for me bring it on we got to show you how to bring it all down bring it on
heaven is a funny joke ---------------------- every day is a perfect day before the clouds come every thing goes your way before it changes some and heaven is a funny joke you only read about in books and nothing goes up in smoke not even meaningful looks but somewhere you hear a laugh a grand laugh indeed and only then do you know just how you've been decieved just thinking it's gold just doing what's told just beleiveing the fools just folowing thier rules and never asking why is the only way you die every gem is a perfect stone right before it cracks every man a backbone just before he lacks and heaven is a funny joke you only see on t.v. and nothing goes up in smoke execpt everything you envy and somewere a invisible hand pushes you a grand hand indeed and only when he uses you do you know how you've been decieved just thinking it's gold just doing what's told just beleiveing the fools just following their rules and never asking why is the only way you die every home a perfect shelter right before it kills you every marrige a perfect bond right before she leaves you and heaven is a funny joke you only hear from the preachers and nothing goes up in smoke except what you hear from teachers and somewhere you feel a stare a grand stare indeed only then do you care to know how you've been decieved just thinking it's gold just doing what's told just beleiving the fools just following their rules and never asking why is the only way you'll ever, truely, die.
Broken Chains -------------- i use to think all that glittered was gold i use to beleive in doing what's been told that was before i broke the chains that bind and left all the lies and nonsense behind broken chains i left behind broke promises used to bind broken hearts i use to find broke boundries i left behind i use to think all that was was here i use to believe this was all so dear but then i was able to read between the lines and break these chains of mine nothing matters but the future and all you have to do is ask why break your chains and kill the butchers and see and spread the light i use to think all that glittered was gold i use to do what ever i was told but then i broke the chains by asking why i know now that i almost died
Love is a funny thing --------------------- I can't beleive what i am seeing oh my god i must be dreaming I tamed my heart but now it's wild i tamed my self but now i'm defiled Love is a funny thing a multifaced thing a golden dimond ring a hellish fiery thing a broken heart without a clue a fool before i only knew who you If i only knew the punchline i would feel just fine but it is a mystery buried deep in history and i will never know the truth oh it feels so uncuth how could i stand this thing love is a funny thing Oh, i can't beleive what i'm saying oh my god i can't be praying what are these three little words i'm saying oh my mind must be fraying love is a funny thing a multifaced thing a golden dimond ring a hellish fiery thing a broken heart without a clue a fool before i met who you oh my god i must be dreaming how to explain what i'm feeling can you hear what i'm saying i actually plan on staying love is a funny thing a multifaced thing a golden dimanod ring a hellish fiery thing a broken heart without a clue a fool before i knew who you
Blah, Blah, Blah ---------------- i know you keep speaking i told you i ain't listening I'm not hearing you at all Blah, blah, blah I wouldn't be complaining if you weren't disdaining i shut you out but you keep breaking in Blah, Blah, Blah Oh my god your so anoying can you bring it down to a lower level drop the subject please your so not on the level could you stop complaining or at least bite your toungue right off God, how can you keep jabbering your lower lip keeps keep flapping shut it up and sew it shut and get the hell out Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah.
So far behind -------------- Never begining never ending only'll end were it began and you'll never see the sunset again and i'll only be where you left me behind so far behind I'll never know the comfort of you you'll never know the comfort of me and i'll never begin to see why you left me so far behind well a new day rises no surprises to see sometimes i wonder am i really me since you left me so far behind sometimes i wonder just what i could be and what this could meen and how this makes me feel sometimes i think that this was a mistake after all you did to me and just how you left me so far behind. so far behind. so far behind. so far. i often remember just how you felt and how you smelled and how your lips tasted and how it was wasted all in one final second and how you left me then so very far behind.
Epitaph ------- alone in the cold, cold rain i could feel, i could feel i could remember all that you said it was so unreal, so unreal then my tears added to the rain i began to kneel, i began to kneel I read the words they wrote so real, so real she lived like an angel sent from heaven above ment to bring us peace ment to bring us love she lifted our spirits high she brought us happiness and light there will never be another like her rest in peace beloved the sky began to thunder i cried your name, your name i made so many blunders i'm suprised you stayed, you stayed my hands began to shake how i cried, how i cried i colapsed under your name and i read she lived like an angel sent from heaven above ment to bring us peace ment to bring us love she lifted our spirits high she brought us happiness and light there will never be another like her rest in peace beloved now i can't live anymore rest in peace i won't i'm dying for you i'm dying for you.
sunspot -------- wake up in the sunshine another day has dawned feeling everything's just fine i feel joy begin to spawn losing my sleep a couple night's bad dreams feeling it's all come and gone wake up in the sun feel the heat warm you feel the joy warm you there is nothing to warn you that joy can burn you wake up to the sunshine the light's so bright i think i may be blind let the light cloud my ways feeling happier every day but i can't seem to look both ways wake up in the sun burning up in happiness i can see the light burning alive in happiness i think i'm going blind feel the heat warm you feel the joy warm you there is nothing to warn you that joy can burn you wake up in the sun feeling senseless and numb feeling my heart begin to throb knowing i'm gorowing dumb knowing i'm going numb wake up in the sunshine where you lay everything will feel just fine as your happiness grows each day and don't worry you won't see it come don't worry you won't feel it come cause you've grown so blind and numb wake up in the sun.
Beast in the Night ------------------- i feel it coming i'm on the run again i know it's gaining i can feel it's breath again oh god i have to beat it if i'm to survive i'll have to win this battle just to stay alive here love comes raging and rampaging on here love comes just a beast in the night just a poor man's plight just a fictionary blight here love comes not silver not steel can make this kill not anything but my cold heart i need a head start if i'm to survive if i'm to stay alive here love comes raging and rampaging on here love comes just a beast in the night just a poor man's plight just a fictionary blight here love comes no where to run no where to hide nothing to say no telling lies here comes love.
Golden rules ------------- somewhere a child is born it will never know love and the mother will die from the fathers love can you feel the pain can you feel the tradgedy it happens every single day let it be told as the truth unfolds that nothing breeds nothing and love breeds love to save the world send a world of love and it will spread endlessly somewhere a father cries his child just died in his own mother's arms she couldn't care they didn't care not that it matters anymore we get what we give we give what we deserve let love be the message we send maybe we can drown all the fire of hate around and bring it all to an end.
WELCOME IN ----------- Always i was empty always until i found you always i was lonely but then you fixed that to I could never stop loving you you saved my life when my heart was broken in two I could never live without you cause the last thing i would ever do is say goodbye to you once i was alone but now i am found opened and empty waiting for you to fill me i opened my heart to you welcome in
MY HEART -------- All i could ever see was anything to benefit me self centered locked away from my heart searching for the key waiting for it to find me then one day i met you suddenly i could see a little past me looking out from my locked heart could you have the key? did you have the key? push it in turn it around undo these chains set me free do you have the key? much to my wild eyed suprise you produced the key opening up my locked heart you let me out let me free free to love again unleash these feelings from my heart free to feel again won't you stay in my heart?
DEDICATION ----------- A child unable to see unable to love thinking only of me a child no more open up these closed doors a man in love deicated to my hearts love I am so in to you dedication to stay through the night I can see what you have done to me i can feel anything and everything that's real i now know what it meens to what it feels to love dedication to stay with you side by side determination to live my life with you dedication to love only you determination to hold on to you forever.
BLOOD ------ i can feel you just under my skin apart of me touching me going all through me beat after beat your are in my blood you keep me alive everyday by staying side by side i can feel you flowing through my heart you know it well i'm under your spell coursing through me beat after beat you are my blood everyday how you say you love me and it keeps me alive everyday side by side I can feel you you are a part of me breathing with me living with me just inside me just below my skin within deep in love with you beat after beat you are my blood your love keeps me alive everyday your by my side everyday i breathe i'm yours
A PROMISE If i should die please don't cry i died a happy man if you should live please don't fret i've loved you since the day we met if i was to die just remember i will always be in you heart because you are a part of me and i am a part of you for all eternity if i was to die i promise you'll see me again so please don't cry and please don't give in if i was to die i've always loved you and every time you dream i'll be there if i was to die don't cry any tears let my crush your fears cause i will still be there
INTO THE SUN perfectly ripe the fruit you plucked how it tumbles to the ground never mistaking your promises were breaking could be heard crashing down i never thought the truth that i sought could be found in me how bitter how sweet that rotting treat how it fills me pour it in and move it around no one cares what i've found but your the only one i need when i have all your victims to feed clothe the poor and treat the sick truth be told you don't give a dick behold the light it's far to bright to gaze upon beneath the lies i'm dead inside what a lame come on help me i feel i'm broken i'm real i've no place in the sun to find what i need what carelessness feeds i am one pour it in and move around no one cares what i've found now it's over and you don't care pull the plug to end it all if you dare now it's over it's said and done watch it fade into the sun last light's ever fading smile one for which i'd run a mile the fruit it rots inside out filling worms without a doubt hear them move watch them bleed when i was one they never liked me to find the truth to seek the smile here i laid all the while pour it in and move around no one cares what i found never ending feel it done watch it all fade watch it all fade watch it all fade, into the sun
SICK CHILDREN saving grace for a latter date tell the truth to dilate holes like eyes your enterprize of catch 22,s and purple hues and all your lies made to hypnotize the citizen's who have no rights so many tell me again how did i sin we have to lose for your abuse take me to hell and back again child like appendages long arms of the law what was my fatal flaw infringements neon clouds over an empty house changing the face of your only discrace your children your children your children sick children take me back to a long summer rose take me back to those fond memories take me back to a long summer fling take me back to almost anything but your world empty haze just another day heldback in bondage and chains watch the world roll by watch the time roll by cause the pigs march by with their whips their chains their long hatefilled days their gaze razorblades your running out of time your out of time out of time (chorus)x2
LEAVE BEHIND feed my mind grating hands masaging my brain screaming agony screaming disdain who weilds the power like iron gloves bears his teeth to show no love feeding the sands of time flowing free full of the dust from grated bones knee deep in your shit you piled so high i for got what is was like to feel free and fly away from this world of hate and leave behind the machine and leave behind the grating agony
KING HEROD'S GOLD waiting their turn in line only to have it close ripped away before their time more priceless than gold why live a lie when they won't live at all whose to say that they should die when their mouth's are still closed open your heart to the world let some light shine in worth more than twice thier weight in gold back to king herod's sin but violence is not the answer it only adds to the toll but what can we do when their little heads roll why believe what they want to believe that life is only here open up your arms to recieve that maybe your baby wants to breathe open your heart to the world let some light shine in worth more than twice their weight in gold back to king herod's sin who's to say they die who's to say you die that's not a question no one can ask who can ask when it's life or death choose life
THIS CAGE CALLED LIFE I now find my self in a strange delrium I can't find the key to the cage I'm in I don't know a way out but i know i got to find it otherwise i can never leave and here i'll stay a prisinor trapped inside my own mind and where it all began is the place where it will end or i will never leave this cage i'm in this cage called life i find myself thinking from day to day will i ever leave here can i ever be saine but some where in the back of my mind i hear my self screaming from time to time as i rattle the bars of my own cell i'm living in hell trapped inside my own mind and where it all began is the place where it will end or i will never leave this cage i'm in this cage called life sometimes i wonder why why it had to be this way but all i know is here i'll stay cause i don't have the key the one thing i need to open my own cell to escape my own hell here inside my own mind and where it all began is the place where it will end or i will never leave this cage i'm in this cage called life.
LIFE IN HELL Here i am i'd rather be dead living off of water and bread it's so stuffy i can not breathe someone open a window please oh god i think i'm gonna be sick smelling the same old shit no one hears my pleas so much begging scabs cover my knees the only sounds i hear are echoed through my brain like the constant steady rythm of an endless pouring rain the only sights that i see are better left unknown like the fate of the masses better left unshown these horrible things cover the ground i feel them all crawling around They live in my mind and my dreams to make them go away i claw my eyes and scream but despite my pitiful please they stay to suck my blood like giant fleas they won't go away o what shall i do i'm so sick of all this and it's all because of you
UNTITLED --------- I look out my window, i see the trees but they twist,contort and give way evrything is spinning and my mind is going down the drain I can't stand the pain! i feel that there is nothing to feel and yet i don't know what's fantasy and real oh i think i know what's right sometimes
FANTASTIC Castles built and castles fall every day a brick in the wall build it up just to break never hope left to take never send an ear to lend leaving out cheerful doubts care to hear my every word just one breath a final word take it home wrapped in plastic another thought too fantastic
DON'T LET IT OUT nevermind the peace of mind that comes from within somewhere in then don't let it out hold it closely hide it away put it away every day don't let it out feel it overflowing better get going hold it in then you can't let it out one tear becomes ten years afraid of all your fears hold it in then don't let it out.
hope you've enjoyed my work, keep in mind i will update soon NightShyft

Email: nightshyft@aol.com