3) Islam’s
Treatment for Anxiety and Worry
Let us now discuss some of the different kinds of remedies and treatments taught by Islam:
1.
Equipping oneself with eemaan (faith),
accompanied by righteous deeds.
Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning): “Whoever
works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true
believer, verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world, with respect,
contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in
proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e., Paradise in the
Hereafter).” [al-Nahl 16:97]
The reason for this is clear: the believers in Allaah
whose faith is correct and motivates them to do righteous deeds that reform
their hearts and characters, and change their status in this world and the next,
have the basic principles according to which they deal with every kind of joy
and grief that they may face. They receive blessings and joys with acceptance
and thanksgiving, and put them to use in beneficial ways. When they do this,
they feel happy and hope that it will last and will bring them reward for their
gratitude, as well as other things that will supercede the original goodness and
blessings.
When
faced with distress, harm, worries and anxieties, they try to resist them and
reduce them as much as they can, and they react with befitting patience to the
things in which they have no choice. They gain a lot of benefits as a result,
such as: resilience and toughness as is appropriate; useful experience, strong
willpower, patience, the hope of reward, and many other benefits which reduce
the distress felt. Thus their anxiety is replaced with joy and the hope of
blessings and reward from Allaah, as the Prophet
stated in the saheeh
hadeeth: “How marvellous is the affair of the believer! Everything that happens
to him is good, and this does not apply to anyone except the believer. If
something good befalls him, he gives thanks for it, and that is good for him. If
something bad befalls him, he bears it with patience, and that is good for
him.”
This
is the way in which we may view calamities in a positive light.
Another
example is:
2. Thinking of how the Muslim may earn expiation for his sins, purify his heart and raise his status, when he is stricken with distress and worry in this life.
The
Messenger of Allaah
said: “Nothing
of fatigue, illness, distress, worry, grief or harm befalls the Muslim, not even
a prick from a thorn, but Allaah will accept it as expiation for some of his
sins.”
According
to a report narrated by Muslim: “No
illness, fatigue, sickness or grief befalls the Muslim, not even worries, but it
will be an expiation for some of his sins.”
The
one who is distressed or worried should know that whatever psychological pain
afflicts him is not wasted, but serves a purpose in increasing his hasanaat
(good deeds) and expiating for his sayi’aat
(bad deeds). The Muslim should realize that if it were not for disasters and
afflictions, we would come empty-handed on the Day of Resurrection, as some of
the salaf (early generations of Islam) pointed out, which is why they
would rejoice when misfortune struck just as we rejoice at times of ease.
When
a person understands how the disasters that befall him expiate for his sins, he
will rejoice and be of good cheer, especially if that happens to him straight
after he has committed a sin, as happened to some of the Sahaabah, may Allaah be pleased with them. ‘Abd-Allaah ibn
Mughaffal (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that a man met a woman who
had been a prostitute during the time of Jaahiliyyah.
He started to joke with her, then he touched her. She told him, “Watch it!
Allaah has destroyed shirk (once ‘Affaan said: has destroyed Jaahiliyyah)
and has brought us Islam.” The man went away, and walked into a wall, cutting
his face. The Prophet
came along, so the man told him what had
happened, and he said: “You are a slave
for whom Allah wishes good. When Allaah wishes good for His slave, He hastens
the punishment for his sin; when He does not wish good for His slave, he
withholds the punishment until the matter is settled on the Day of Resurrection,
when all of his sins will be brought forth together.”
The
Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: “When Allaah
wishes good for His slave, He hastens to bring about his punishment in this
world, and if He does not wish good for him, He withholds the punishment until
he is dealt with for his sin on the Day of Resurrection.”
3.
Understanding the reality of this world
The
believer knows that this world is only temporary, that its luxuries are few, and
that whatever pleasures exist here are always imperfect. If it causes a little
laughter, it gives many reasons to weep; if it gives a little, it withholds far
more. The believer is only detained here, as the Messenger of Allaah
said: “This
world is the prison of the believer and the paradise of the kaafir.”
This
world is also fatigue, pain, misery and suffering, so the believer feels relief
when he departs from it. Abu Qutaadah ibn Rib’i al-Ansaari used to say that a
funeral passed the Messenger of Allaah
and he said: “He
is now relieved, and people feel relieved of him.” The people asked, “O
Messenger of Allaah, how can he be relieved and people feel relieved of him?”
He said, “The believing slave (who dies) is relieved of the fatigue and pain of
this world and has gone to the mercy of Allaah; when the rebellious slave dies,
people, land, trees and animals are relieved of him.”
For
the believer, death brings a respite from the distress, worries and pain of this
life, as is stated in the hadeeth: “When
the believer is about to die, the angels of mercy bring white silk and say,
‘Come out content, with the pleasure of Allaah upon you, to the mercy of
Allaah and sweet fragrance and a Lord who is not angry.’ So (the soul) comes
out like the best fragrance of musk and the angels hand it to one another until
they bring it to the gate of heaven. They say, ‘How good is this fragrance
that has come from the earth.’ They bring it to the souls of the believers,
and they rejoice over it much more than you do when one who has been absent
returns. They ask him, ‘What did So-and-so do? What did So-and-so do?’ then
(the angels) say, ‘Leave him alone, for he was suffering the distress of the
world.’ When he asks, ‘Did not So-and-so come to you?’ they say: ‘He was
taken to his home in the Pit (i.e., Hell).’ When the kaafir is about to die,
angels of punishment bring sackcloth and say, ‘Come out discontent, with the
wrath of Allaah upon you, to the punishment of Allaah.’ So (the soul) comes
out like the worst stench of rotten meat, and they take it to the gate of the
earth. They say, ‘How foul is this stench,’ until they bring it to the souls
of the kuffaar.”
This
understanding of the reality of this world makes it easier for the believer to
bear afflictions, pains, distress and anxiety, because he knows that they are an
inevitable part of the nature of this life.
4.
Following the examples of the Prophets and the righteous
The
Prophets and the righteous suffered more distress in this world than other
people. Each person is tested according to the strength of his faith. If Allaah
loves a person, He tests him. Sa’d (may Allaah be pleased with him) asked the
Prophet : “O Messenger of Allaah, which of the people suffers the
most distress?” He said: “The
Prophets, then those who come after them (in terms of status), then those who
come after them. A man will be tested according to the strength of his faith. If
his faith is strong, then the distress with which he is tried will be greater;
if his faith is weak, he will be tested in accordance with the level of his
faith. Distress will keep on befalling the slave until he walks on the face of
the earth
5.
Making the Hereafter one’s main concern
The
concerns of this world overwhelm and confuse people, but if the slave makes the
Hereafter his main concern, Allaah will help him to focus and be determined, as
was narrated by Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him): “The Messenger of
Allaah
said: ‘Whoever has the
Hereafter as his main concern, Allaah will fill his heart with a feeling of
richness and independence; he will be focused and feel content, and this world
will come to him in spite of it. Whoever has this world as his main concern,
Allaah will cause him to
Ibn
al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “When a person spends his
entire day with no other concern but Allaah alone, Allaah, may He be glorified,
will take care of all his needs and take care of all that is worrying him; He
will empty his heart so that it will be filled only with love for Him, free his
tongue so that it will speak only in remembrance of Him (dhikr) and cause all his faculties to work only in obedience to Him.
But if a person spends his entire day with no other concern but this world,
Allaah will make him bear its distress, anxiety and pain; He will leave him to
sort himself out, and cause his heart to be distracted from the love of Allaah
towards the love of some created being, cause his tongue to speak only in
remembrance of that creation instead of remembering Allaah, and cause his
faculties to work in obeying and serving them. So he will strive hard, labouring
like some work-animal, to serve something other than Allaah… Everyone who
turns away from being a true slave of Allaah and obeying Him and loving Him will
be burdened with servitude, love and obedience to some created being. Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning): ‘And whosoever turns away (blinds himself) from the remembrance of the
Most Beneficent (Allaah), We appoint for him a shaytaan (devil) to be a qareen
(intimate companion) to him.’ [al-Zukhruf 43:36].”
6.
A surprisingly effective remedy: remembering death
The
Prophet
said: “Remember
frequently the one who will destroy all your pleasures: death, for there is
no-one who remembers death when in straitened circumstances, but his situation
will become easier, and there is no-one who remembers death during times of
ease, but his circumstances will become straitened.”
7.
Praying to Allaah, may He be exalted
Du‘aa’
(prayer or supplication) is very beneficial, and includes both protection and
treatment. As far as protection in concerned, the Muslim is obliged to turn to
Allaah and pray to Him for refuge from distress and to keep him away from it, as
the Prophet
used to do. His servant Anas (may Allaah be pleased with
him) tells us: “I used to serve the Messenger of Allaah
when he stayed in Madeenah
(i.e. was not travelling). I often used to hear him saying: ‘Allaahumma inni a’oodhu bika min al-hamm wa’l-hazn wa’l-‘ajz
wa’l-kasal wa’l-bukhl wa’l-jubn wa dala’ al-dayn wa ghalbat al-rijaal (O
Allaah, I seek refuge with You from distress, grief, incapacity, laziness,
miserliness, cowardice, the burden of debt and from being overpowered by
men).’”
This
du‘aa’ is very effective in
preventing distress before it happens; prevention is better, and easier, than
cure.
When
one is worried about what may happen in the future, the following du‘aa’
is very beneficial. Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that
the Prophet
used to say: “Allaahumma
aslih li deeni alladhi huwa ‘ismat amri wa aslih li dunyaaya allati fihaa
ma’aashi wa aslih li aakhirati allati fihaa ma’aadi w’aj’al al-hayaata
ziyaadatan li fi kulli khayri w’aj’al al-mawta raahatan li min kulli sharr
(O Allaah, make me adhere properly to my religion, on which all my affairs
depend; make this world good for me in which is my livelihood; make my Hereafter
good for me, in which is my ultimate destiny; make my life increase in every
good thing and make my death a respite from every evil).”
When
distress and pain befall a person, the door of du‘aa’ is always open to him; it is never closed. When one calls
upon the Most Generous, He will respond and give. Allaah says (interpretation of
the meaning): “And when My slaves ask
you concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My
Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me
(without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so
that they may be led aright.” [al-Baqarah 2:186]
One
of the greatest du‘aa’s which take away distress and anxiety and
bring joy is the famous du‘aa’ which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) encouraged
everyone who hears it to learn it by heart:
The
Messenger of Allaah
said: “There is no-one who is afflicted by
distress and grief, and says: ‘Allaahumma inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn
amatija naasyati bi yadika, maada fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka.
As’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi
kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm
il-ghayb ‘indaka an taj’al al-Qur’aana rabee’ qalbi wa noor sadri wa
jalaa’ huzni wa dhihaab hammi (O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave,
son of Your maidservant; my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is
forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name
belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book,
or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of
the Unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the
light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my
anxiety),’ but Allaah will take away his distress and grief, and replace it
with joy.” He was asked: “O Messenger of Allaah, should we learn
this?” He said: “Of course; everyone who hears it should learn it.”
This
important hadeeth indicates the following: the slave should admit that he
belongs to Allaah and that he cannot do without Him and has no other master than
Allaah; that he should be a slave to Allaah, announce his submission to Him,
obey His commandments and heed His prohibitions; that Allaah is directing and
controlling him as He wills; that he should demonstrate his submission to Allaah
and his acceptance of His decree; that he should pray to Allaah, using all His
Names, then ask for what he needs.
A
number of other du‘aa’s to do with distress and anxiety have also
been narrated in the Sunnah. They include the following:
Ibn
‘Abbaas reported that when the Messenger of Allaah
felt distressed,
he would say: “Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah al-‘Azeem al-Haleem, laa ilaaha ill-Allaah
Rabb al-‘Arsh al-‘azeem, la ilaaha ill-Allaah Rabb al-samawaat wa Rabb al-ard
wa Rabb al-‘Arsh al-kareem (There is no god but Allaah, the All-Powerful, the
Forbearing; there is no god but Allaah, Lord of the mighty Throne; there is no
god but Allaah, Lord of heaven, Lord of earth, and Lord of the noble Throne).”
Anas
(may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that when the Messenger of Allaah
was distressed by something,
he would say: “Yaa Hayyu yaa Qayyoom bi rahmatika astagheeth (O
Ever-Living, O Eternal, by Your mercy I seek help).”
Asmaa’
bint ‘Umayr said: “The Messenger of Allaah
said to me: ‘Shall I not
teach you some words which you can say at times of distress? ‘Allaah Allaah
rabbee laa ushriku bihi shay’an (Allaah Allaah is my Lord, I do not associate
Another
of the beneficial du‘aa’s which the Messenger of Allaah
taught us is the one he told
us about when he said: “The du‘aa’ of the person who is in distress is:
Allaahumma rahmataka arjoo fa laa takilni ilaa nafsi tarfat ‘ayn w’aslih li
sha’ni kullahu laa ilaaha illa anta (O Allaah, for Your mercy I hope, so do
not leave me in charge of my affairs even for the blink of an eye; rectify all
my affairs. There is no god except You)’”
If
a person thinks about the meaning of these du‘aa’s and prays with
concentration and a sincere intention, doing all those things that can help to
bring about a response, Allaah will fulfil his hopes and do the things asked
for; He will turn his distress into joy.
If
the du‘aa’ comes from a heart which is filled with faith, it will
dispel worry and bring comfort. The scholars have mentioned many stories of
people who prayed to Allaah in times of calamity and distress, and Allaah
responded to their prayer and saved them from an enemy, or from drowning, or
from starvation or disaster. One example is the story of what happened to the
great Sahaabi al-‘Alaa al-Hadrami, who was one of the most prominent scholars
and devoted worshippers, one of the close friends (awliyaa’) of Allaah
whose du‘aa’s are answered. During the campaign against the apostates
of Bahrain, he pitched camp, but before the people could settle down, the camels
bolted, carrying away all the provisions of the army, including their tents and
water, leaving them with nothing but the clothes they were wearing. It was
night-time, and
8. Praying for the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) (i.e., saying “Allaahumma
salli ‘ala Muhammad,” etc.)
This
is one of the greatest ways through which Allaah may relieve worries:
Al-Tufayl
ibn Ubayy ibn Ka’b reported that his father said: “When two-thirds of the
night had passed, the Messenger of Allaah
got up and said: ‘O people, remember
Allaah, remember Allaah. The first blowing of the Trumpet has come, and
9.
Relying upon Allaah and entrusting matters to Him
“When
a person knows that Allaah is Able to do all things, that He alone makes choices
for His slaves and runs their affairs, that the way He runs His slave’s
affairs is better than the way the slave would do it for himself, that He knows
better about the slave’s interests than the slave does, that He is more able
to achieve them, that He is more sincere and more merciful towards His slave
than the slave is to himself; and also knows that he cannot progress or regress
any further than the limits that Allaah has decreed for him, for nobody can
change the will and decree of Allaah – when a person knows all this, he will
submit himself to his Lord and hand over his affairs to Him, throwing himself
before his Lord like a weak slave throwing himself before a mighty and powerful
king. Allaah deals with His slave as He wishes, and the slave has nothing to do
with it. Only after he has submitted thus will the slave feel relief from his
distress, worries and regrets. He gives the burden of his needs and interests to
One Who is not concerned about how heavy or great the burden is. Allaah will
take care of it, instead of him, and will show him His kindness and mercy,
without the slave getting tired or worried, because all his concern is now
focused on Allaah alone. His worry about his needs and interests in this world
has been lifted from him and his heart is now free of this concern. How good his
life is now, how blessed his heart and how great his happiness and joy!
But
as for the person who insists on running his own affairs and making his own
choices, whose concern is only for his own share and not for his duties towards
his Lord, Allaah will leave him alone with the choices he has made, so he will
be surrounded by concerns, worries, distress, grief, fear, exhaustion and
depression. His thoughts will be confused, none of his deeds will be pure and
none of his hopes will be fulfilled. He will gain no respite, and will enjoy no
pleasure. He will never feel joy or contentment. He will be labouring like a
working-animal, with no hope of gaining anything that could help him in the
Hereafter.”
“When
a person relies upon Allaah and puts his trust in Him, he is not controlled by
bad illusions. He trusts in Allaah and hopes for bounty from Him, which protects
him from distress and worry, as well as many psychological and physical
diseases. Thus his heart gains indescribable strength, relaxation and joy. The
one who is truly free from problems is the one whom Allaah has freed and helped
to strive against his own-self
The
person who relies on Allaah is strong in heart and is not adversely affected by
illusions or things that happen, because he knows that this is a sign of
weakness and fear that is unfounded. He also knows that Allaah has guaranteed to
take complete care of the one who puts his trust in Him, so he trusts Allaah and
has confidence in His promise. Thus his worries and anxiety disappear, hardship
is replaced with ease, sadness turns to joy and fear turns to a feeling of
security. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and to bless us with strength of heart
and steadfastness through complete reliance on Him, for He has guaranteed all
goodness and protection from all evil and harm to those who put their trust in
Him.”
10. Other ways of dispelling distress and
anxiety include paying attention to what is beneficial, focusing on what matters
today and no longer worrying about what may happen tomorrow or regretting what
happened yesterday
Hence
the Prophet
sought refuge with Allaah from worry and regret: regret for
things that have happened in the past which one cannot go back and change, and
worries about what may happen in the future. The slave should think only about
the
present, focusing his energy on doing his best today, because this is what
results in perfect work, and helps him to forget his worries and regrets. When
the Prophet
prayed a du‘aa’, or taught it to his ummah,
he encouraged them not only to seek the help of Allaah and hope for His
blessings, but also to work hard and strive to achieve the protection they
prayed for, for du‘aa’ goes hand-in-hand with effort. Thus the slave
will strive for whatever benefits him in his religion or his worldly affairs,
and will ask his Lord to grant him the result for which he is aiming. He asks
Allaah for help, just as Abu Hurayrah reported: “The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘The strong
believer is
Thus the Prophet
established a link between, on the one
hand, his command to strive for beneficial things in every situation, seeking
the help of Allaah, and not giving in to feelings of inadequacy which the
harmful kind of laziness, and, on the other, giving in to regret for things in
the past which are over and done with, and thinking about the will and decree of
Allaah. He described things as being of two types: things which the slave
can strive to achieve either in totality or as much as he can, or can protect
himself from them, or lessen their impact, by making an effort and seeking the
help of Allaah; and others about which he cannot do anything, so he should
accept them and be content. Undoubtedly,
The
hadeeth quoted above indicates that one should strive to eliminate the
causes of distress and bring about causes of happiness, by forgetting about bad
things in the past that cannot be changed, and by realizing that to spend too
much time thinking about such an impossible task is a foolish and crazy waste of
time. So one should try not to think about it, and try not to feel anxious about
the future or imagine fear and poverty that may or may not lie ahead. We should
realize that the future, whether good or bad, is something unknown; it is in the
hands of the Almighty, All-Wise, not in the hands of His slaves, and all they
have to do is to strive for the good things and protect themselves from bad
things. The slave should know that if he distracts his mind from worries about
the future and puts his trust in his Lord, then Allaah will take care of it and
his worry and anxiety will disappear.
11. One of the most effective ways of
finding comfort and contentment is to remember Allaah frequently
Dhikr
(remembrance of Allaah) has a wonderful effect in calming the soul and relieving
stress and worry. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “…Verily,
in the remembrance of Allaah do hearts find rest.” [al-Ra’d 13:28]
The
greatest phrase of dhikr that can relieve the distress of death is:
“Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah (there is no god except Allaah).” This is what Talhah
told ‘Umar, may Allaah be pleased with him: “I heard the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say a word which no slave
12.
Seeking refuge in prayer
Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning): “And seek help in patience and al-salaat
(the prayer)…” [al-Baqarah 2:45].
Hudhayfah
said: “Whenever the Prophet
was grieved by something, he used to
pray.” When Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) heard about the
death of his brother, he stopped at the side of the road – as he was on a
journey – and prayed, following the command of Allaah.
13. Another thing that may dispel worry is
jihaad for the sake of Allaah.
The
Prophet
said: “You must strive in jihaad for the sake of Allaah,
may He be blessed and exalted, for it is one of the gates to Paradise, and
Allaah dispels worry and distress through it.”
14. Speaking about the blessings of Allaah,
both those which are obvious and those which are hidden
Acknowledging them and speaking about them dispels worry
and distress. The slave is encouraged to have the attitude of thankfulness,
which is the highest level he can reach, even if he is in a state of poverty,
sickness or other kinds of misery. If he were to compare the innumerable
blessings that Allaah has bestowed upon him with the bad thing that has befallen
him, he will see that the distress is as nothing in comparison to the blessings.
When Allaah tests His slave by means of these disasters and miseries, and the
slave does his duty of being patient and accepting, then the difficulties become
easy for him to bear, and he has the hope of earning reward from Allaah for
submitting to Him, and being patient and content. This makes bitter things
sweet; the sweetness of the reward helps him to forget the bitterness of
patience.
One
of the most beneficial things in this regard is to follow the advice of the
Prophet
given in the
saheeh hadeeth reported by Abu Hurayrah: “The
Messenger of Allaah
said: ‘Look at those who are below you,
not at those who are above you, so that you will not think little of the
blessings that Allaah has bestowed upon you.’ ”
If
a person keeps this important concept (of looking only at those below him) in
mind, he will definitely feel that he is better-off than many others when it
comes to good health, physical strength, and provision (rizq) such as
food, clothing, shelter, etc., no matter what his situation. So his anxiety and
distress will disappear, and he will feel increased happiness and joy in the
blessings of Allaah which have raised him above others.
The
more he thinks about the blessings of Allaah, both obvious and hidden, spiritual
and worldly, he will see that his Lord has given him many good things, and has
lifted from him many bad things. No doubt this too will dispel worries and
anxieties, and bring joy and happiness.
15.
Keeping oneself busy with useful work or the pursuit of beneficial knowledge
This
will distract a person’s mind from the matter that has been causing anxiety.
Maybe then he will forget the causes of his distress, and begin to feel happier
and more energetic. This is something which both believers and non-believers may
try to do, but the believer is distinguished by the fact of his eemaan
(faith), his sincerity and his hope for reward when he occupies himself with
learning or teaching something useful or doing something beneficial. If he is
keeping himself busy with worship, then this is worship, and if he is keeping
himself busy with some worldly work or custom, then he tries to accompany it
with the right intention, and seeks the help of Allaah to do this thing as an
act of obedience or worship to Him. Thus his action will be
16. Looking for the positive aspects of the
events in which he tends to see only things that he dislikes
Abu
Hurayrah said: “The Messenger of Allaah
said: ‘No believing man should hate a
believing woman. If he dislikes one aspect of her character, he will be pleased
with another.’ ”
The
benefits of this hadeeth include: lifting anxiety and stress, preserving
tranquillity, continued upholding of the duties which are either obligatory or
encouraged, and the achievement of peace between the two parties. Anyone who is
not guided by the Prophet’s words, but does the opposite, will see only the
negative aspects of a situation, and will be blinded to the positive aspects. So
it is inevitable that he will become anxious and depressed, the relationships
between him and those with whom he is in close contact will turn sour, and he
will neglect many of the mutual duties that both parties should pay attention
to.
17. Understanding the true value and
shortness of this life, and that time is too precious to be wasted in stress and
anxiety
The
wise person understands that his true life is one of joy and contentment. Life
is very short, and he should not let himself get carried away with distress and
depression that will make it even
18.
Another beneficial measure is not to allow one’s work and other duties to
accumulate
This
means taking decisive action immediately, so that one is free to deal with
whatever comes up in the future, because things that are not dealt with
immediately pile up and are added to previous work that should have been done,
thus making the burden even heavier. If you deal
You
should prioritize your work in order of importance, and try to choose things
that interest you and that you enjoy, otherwise you will become bored and fed
up. You can help yourself to achieve this by thinking clearly and consulting
others, for one need never regret consultation. Study what you want to do in
depth, and once you are sure about what action is needed to achieve your
interest and have resolved to go ahead, then put your trust in Allaah, for
Allaah loves those who put their trust in Him.
19.
Constantly anticipating and being prepared for all possibilities
If
a person is prepared for the possibility of the loss of a loved one, the
sickness of a relative, incurring a debt, being overpowered by an enemy, or any
other unpleasant possibility that has not yet happened – whilst seeking refuge
with Allaah and hoping to be safe from it – then if his fears materialize,
their impact will not be so great because he has already anticipated them and
prepared himself to deal with them.
One
important point that we should make is the fact that many ambitious people are
prepared to deal with major calamities in a calm and patient manner, but they
are unduly worried and stressed by trivial problems. The reason for this is that
they prepare themselves to face major problems, but forget to prepare themselves
to cope with minor troubles, which consequently cause them harm. The prudent
person prepares himself to deal with both major and minor problems, and asks
Allaah to help him and not leave him to deal with it by himself for even the
blink of an eye. Thus both major and minor troubles become easier to bear, and
he remains calm and serene.
20.
Another remedy is to complain to religious scholars and ask them for advice
Their
advice and opinions are among the things that can be of the greatest help in
remaining steadfast at times of calamity. The Sahaabah used to complain to the
Messenger of Allaah
about the torture they were suffering…
Khabbaab
ibn al-Aratt (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “We complained to the
Messenger of Allaah
when he was reclining on his cloak in the shade
of the Ka‘bah. We said to him: ‘Why do you not ask Allaah to help us (grant
us victory)? Why do you not pray to Allaah for us?’ He said, ‘A man from
the people before you would be placed in a hole dug for him, then they would
bring a saw and cut his head in two, yet that would not make him renounce his
faith. They would use an iron comb to drag the flesh and nerves from his bones,
yet that would not make him renounce his faith. By Allaah, this matter will be
completed (i.e. Islam will be perfected and will prevail) until a rider
travelling from Sana‘aa’ to Hadramawt will fear nobody but Allaah or the
attack of a wolf on his sheep, but you are too impatient.’”
The
Taabi‘een also complained to the Sahaabah. Al-Zubayr ibn
‘Adiyy said: “We came to Anas ibn Maalik and complained to him about what we
were suffering at the hands of al-Hajjaaj. He told us: ‘Be patient, for there
will come no time but the time after it is worse, until you meet your Lord. I
heard that from your Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him).’”
So
the Muslim will hear from the scholars and leaders words which will help him and
alleviate his pain, distress and anxiety.
Similarly,
one can also seek the help of sincere brothers, wise relatives and faithful
spouses. When Faatimah (may Allaah be pleased with her) felt distress, she
complained to her husband ‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him). ‘Abd-Allaah
ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him and his father) tells us the story: the Messenger of Allaah
came to visit Faatimah, but
he found a curtain over her door, so he did not enter. It was very rare for him
to enter without greeting her so when ‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him)
came, he saw that she was worried and upset. He asked, “What is the matter?”
She said, “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to me, but
he did not come in.” So ‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) went to him
and said: “O Messenger of Allaah, Faatimah feels very upset because you came
to her but you did not come in.” He said, “I have nothing to do with
these worldly things and fancy decorations.” So ‘Ali went to tell
Faatimah what the Messenger of Allaah
had said. She said, “Ask the Messenger of Allaah
what I should do with it.”
He said, “tell her to send it to Banu So-and-so.” (It was a curtain
that was decorated with embroidery and so on).
Going to a man who is wise and has sound opinions can
also help to dispel anxiety.
Al-Mugheerah,
the freed slave of al-Waleed, said: “I entered upon al-Waleed and found him
looking worried. I asked, ‘What is worrying you, O Ameer al-Mu’mineen?’ He
said, ‘The number of Muslims has increased, and the mosque is becoming too
small for them. I offered them money for the rest of this church, so that I
could take it and add it to the mosque, to make the place big enough for the
Muslims, but they refused.’ Al-Mugheerah said: ‘O Ameer al-Mu’mineen, I
have an idea that may relieve your worry.’ He asked, ‘What is it?’ I said:
‘When the Sahaabah took Damascus, Khaalid ibn al-Waleed entered through the
Eastern Gate, conquering by the sword. When the people heard of this, they
rushed towards Abu ‘Ubaydah (who was laying siege to another gate of the
city), asking him for protection. He granted them protection, so they opened the
Gate of Jaabiyah for him. Abu ‘Ubaydah entered peacefully, having made a truce
with the people. We should find out how far the military seizure of land
reached, and take it, but the areas covered by the truce should be left in their
hands. I hope that all of the church will be on land seized militarily, so that
you can incorporate it into the mosque.’
Al-Waleed
said: ‘You have made me feel much better. Take care of this matter
yourself.’ So al-Mugheerah took care of it; he surveyed the area extending
from the Eastern Gate towards the Gate of Jaabiyah, as far as Sooq al-Rayhaan,
and found that the military seizure of territory had continued as far as a
little more than four cubits beyond the Great Arch, so the church could be
incorporated into the mosque. So al-Waleed sent word to the Christians to tell
them: ‘The whole of this church lies in the territory which was seized
militarily, so it belongs to us, not to you.’ They said: ‘Initially you
offered us money and land, and we refused. Be generous and give us what you
offered us originally, so that we may settle this matter peaceably, and we will
give you the rest of the church.’ So the matter was settled peaceably.” (Al-Badaayah
wa’l-Nihaayah fi Seerat al-Waleed).
21.
The person who is distressed or worried should know that after hardship comes
ease
So
he should think positively and realize that Allaah will make a way out for him.
The more intense his stress and depression is, the closer he is to relief and a
way out.
Allaah
says in Soorat al-Sharh (interpretation of the meaning): “So verily, with
the hardship, there is relief, verily, with the hardship, there is relief.”
[al-Sharh 94:5-6]. In effect, hardship is mentioned once, and relief is
mentioned twice, because the definite article (“al”) indicates that
the hardship mentioned in the first aayah quoted is the same as that
mentioned in the second, whereas the fact that relief is mentioned in an
indefinite form (with tanween) shows that the relief mentioned in the
second aayah is different from that mentioned in the first.
The
Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) advised Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him and
his father): “Know that victory (or achievement) comes through patience,
and that ease comes through hardship…”
22.
Another remedy for distress is certain kinds of food
Al-Bukhaari
(may Allaah have mercy on him) reports that ‘Aa’ishah used to order talbeen
for people who were sick or had been stricken by tragedy, and she would say:
“I heard the Messenger of Allaah
say: ‘Talbeen warms the
heart of the sick person and alleviates some of a person’s grief.’ ”
Al-Bukhaari
also narrated from ‘Aa’ishah, the wife of the Prophet
that whenever a
member of her family died, and the women gathered together then dispersed,
except for her family and close friends, she would ask for a pot of talbeen,
then she would cook it, make thareed [a dish of sopped bread, meat and broth]
and pour the talbeen over it, then tell the women: “Eat from it, for I
heard the Messenger of Allaah
say that
talbeen is the cure for the heart
of the sick person and alleviates some of a person’s grief.”
Talbeen
is a soup or broth made from flour or bran to which honey is added. It is called
talbeen because it resembles milk (laban). It is cooked from
ground barley.
Saying
that it is a cure for the heat of the sick person means that it relaxes him,
gives him energy and alleviates his grief and distress.
Ahmad
(may Allaah have mercy on him) reported that ‘Aa’ishah said: “Whenever the
Messenger of Allaah
heard that someone was sick or in pain, and not
eating, he would say: ‘You should make talbeen and let him sip it. By the
One in Whose hand is my soul, it will cleanse the stomach of any one of you just
as you wash the dirt from your faces with water.’ ”
Al-Tirmidhi
reported that ‘Aa’ishah said: “Whenever any member of his family fell ill,
he would order that soup or broth be made for them, then he would tell them to
sip it. He used to say, ‘It makes the grieving heart strong and cleanses the
heart of the sick person, just as any of you cleanses the dirt from her face
with water.’”
Even
though some people might find this strange, this is a true matter, as it has
been proven to be part of the Revelation conveyed by the infallible Prophet
. Allaah has created all kinds
of food, and He knows best their characteristics, so the soup of barley
mentioned in the hadeeth is one of the types of food that make people
feel better. And Allaah knows best.
With
regard to the method of cooking this food for the person who is physically sick
or whose heart is stricken with grief, Ibn Hajr (may Allaah have mercy on him)
said: “What suits the sick person is the water from barley that has been
cooked whole, and what suits the grieving person
is the water from ground barley that has been cooked. And Allaah knows best.”