1965
- (July) In an alternate time line, John F. Kennedy is being taken from Idlewild Airport to an open prison to serve his three year sentence. Lister goes here and convinced Kennedy to travel back to 1963, and stand behind the grassy knoll, and assassinate himself. Kennedy agrees and the time line is corrected.

1966
- In an alternate time line, J. Edgar Hoover is now president, forced to run by the mob, who had pictures of him at a transvestite orgie. The USSR is allowed to install nuclear bases at Cuba in return for Mafia cocaine trafficking between Cuba and the states. The base is so close to the US, people flee from all the major cities.

1989
- The crew goes through a cosmic storm and enter a parallel universe. They materialize on an exact replica of Earth.

1993
- Rimmer and Kryten enter through a time hole into a backwards reality. (3991)
- (+3 weeks) Cat and Lister arrive, and discover Kryten and Rimmer are an act at a local pub, calling themselves The Reverse Brothers. The foursome get into a barroom brawl and Kryten and Rimmer get fired from their jobs. The four return to our reality.

2080
- Interstellar travel is considered economically and philosophically interesting. Stasis booths are also invented around this time.

2130
- Stellarnauts try to reintegrate into society and try to cope with the fact they are 50 years younger than their own children. This led to curious generation gaps problems, of which the Greeting Card industry took full advantage of.

2145
- MP Angus Thornton is born.

2149
- Arnold Rimmer is born on Io. Around this time, Fred "Thickie" Holden is born also.

2154
- Kristine Kochanski is born.

2155
- (October 14) David Lister is born. This date is approximate and was placed on the Jupiter Mining Corporation Recruitment forms.

- (November 26) Lister travels back in time and places himself, at age 6 weeks, under a pool table in a cardboard box at The Aigburth Arms in Liverpool. He writes the word "Ouroboros" on the side as a message to himself in the future.

2156
- Rimmer is not held back in Junior D causing him to become a complete git. In an alternate dimension, Rimmer (known as Ace), does stay behind and learns to stick up for himself. Rimmer's oldest brother, John, is already a Test Pilot.

2157
- Rimmer goes back in time and tries to convince himself to invent the tension sheet. Unfortunately Thickie Holden invents it first, and corrects the event to the way it originally was.

2159
- Rimmer is betrayed by his only friend at Io House, Porky Roebuck. During a Space Scout camp, Porky lead a group of boys who tries to eat Rimmer.

2161
- Rimmer, at age 12, loses his shoes with the compass in the heel and the animal tracks on the sole. Porky Roebuck throws them into a septic tank. Rimmer cries for weeks. He was wearing them.

2162

- (July) Lister's adopted father dies.

2163
- At the age of 14, Rimmer goes on a camping holiday with his mother, his Uncle Frank, and Frank's twin daughters. Middle of the night Rimmer wakes up to find a tongue stuck down his throat. He opens his eyes and can't believe it. It's his Uncle Frank! Somehow he had gotten the wrong room. He thought Rimmer was his mother. This was Rimmer's first French kiss.

- Rimmer divorces his parents at the age of 14 - takes them to court, gets paid maintenance until employment age and access every fourth weekend to the family dog.

2164
- Rimmer, age 15, thought he had gotten lucky with Fiona Barrington in his father's greenhouse, but as it turned out he had his hand in warm compost.

2165
- Rimmer decides to join the Space Corps. He has done a lot in this year, including attending Saturn Tech where he took a maintenance course, was a member of the Io Amateur War Gamers, the Recreators of the Battle Neasdon and in the Love Celibacy Society. He joined the Samaritans, but for only a day. How was he supposed to know that everyone he talked to was going to jump of a building. Even the person that called just to get the cricket scores. The newspapers call it "Lemming Sunday".

- Lister, age 10, becomes friends with Duncan. Duncan was his best mate. He taught Lister how to put mirrors on his toe caps to look up girls skirts. Duncan had to move to Spain because of a job. It was a bank job his dad pulled in Purley.

2167
- Rimmer joins the Space Corps. on the ship Red Dwarf as a Third Technician.

- Lister, at the age of 11, goes to live with his grandmother. He starts to get fat, just like her. His nickname around this time was "fat boy."

2168
- At the age of 12, Lister loses his virginity, to Michelle Fisher, on the ninth hole of Bootle Municipal Golf Course. Around this time, Lister and his mates go out scrumping for cars.

2169
- At age 13, Lister's grandmother dies. The guy who draws the chalk outline had to go back to the truck to get a second piece of chalk to finish. Lister was determined not to be fat like her.

2170
- Lister starts to work as a trolley attendant, he later starts to think of this as a career.

2171
- On a school trip to Paris, Lister gets drunk for the first time on some cheap red Plonk. Went on a guided tour of the Eiffel Tower, and was fine until they reached the top, then he couldn't hold it in anymore. Apparently it had landed in Mount Martyr, that's five miles away. Supposedly some pavement artist sold it to a rich Texan telling him is was a genuine Jackson Pollock.

2172
- Pete, the sparrow, is born.

- Lister, age 17, is in the band Smeg and the Heads. He has written his first song, "Om", and dresses in Sham Glam. Around this time, while working at Megamart as a trolley attendant, Lister falls in love with Cashier Number 4, age 22. One evening they are caught making love on tinned asparagus by her husband. He shoves Lister in a box and threatens to throw him in the canal. Lister pleads. The guy tells him to never see her again. When Lister gets out of the box, he is naked in the middle of the Bootle-Players' amateur production of "The Importance of Being Earnest." This is how Lister got claustrophobia.

2173
- Lister starts attending Art College. 97 minutes after enrolling, he quits after he learns that they give lectures first thing in the afternoon. (Who's together by then, you can still taste the toothpaste.)

- Lister begins dating Lise Yates.

2174
- (8 months) Lister breaks up Lise Yates, because he wants to "play the field."

-Earth's polar star changed and the entire Zodiac had to be realigned. Denis and Josie meet at a New Zodiac Festival. Denis is a Bliss addict and Josie is a game head.

2175
- During the '74/'75 season Jim Bexley Speed, the London Jets Roof Attack, breaks the all-time record for three-dimensional yardage in a single season of Zero-Gee football. Lister was at the game that this occurred.

- Thickie Holden originally invents the Tension sheet, which makes him a millionaire.

2176
- Denis and Josie last made love in this year. They are still with each other, but too addicted.

2180
- (March 16) Rimmer loses his virginity to Yvonne McGruder, the ship's female boxing champion. (She had been hit on the head with a winch, and kept calling him Norman.) It started at 7:31pm and lasted till 7:43pm. Twelve minutes! And that included the time it took the eat pizza. Rimmer never had sex again.

- Lister quits his job as a trolley attendant after 10 years, because he doesn't want to get tied down to a career.

- (October) Lister celebrates his 25th birthday with six of his friends in Liverpool, by hopping the pubs. He says that he is going out to buy a Monopoly board, and wakes up on Mimas with no money and a passport in the name of Emily Berkenstein.

- (November 25) Rimmer is invited to sit at the Captain's table. Him and six officers. The soup, Gezpacho. Rimmer tells the waiter to take it back, because it's cold. The crew officers laugh at him. He thought they were laughing at the cook, but all the time they were laughing at him. For the rest of his life he will remember this day as "Gezpacho Soup Day."

2181
- (February 19) Denis mugs Lister and gets 53 dollar pounds. Lister, fed up with Mimas, tries to join the Space Corps.

- (February 20) Lister becomes a member of Red Dwarf, as a third technician.

- (February 21) Red Dwarf makes a brief stop on Titan. There Lister picks up Frankenstein, a pregnant tom cat. He gets her vaccinated and smuggles her aboard the ship, hoping that he will get caught with her and sent to stasis for the rest of the trip. Supply Officer, Caroline Carmen, gets reposted at Titan, she will join the JMC supply ship Leviation.

- (February 26) Lister makes breakfast for Rimmer by using Titan mushrooms (more commonly known to the beatnik society as "Freaky Fungus.") After breakfast Rimmer attends inspection parade. He was totally naked except for a pair of mock leather driving gloves and blue swimming goggles. He attacks two senior officers believing that they are giraffes who were armed and dangerous. (The clock on the wall in Red Dwarf was apparently wrong, the day was correct but the year was wrong. This is confirmed in Rimmer's diary.)

- (February 28) Lister meets Kochanski at one of the ship's bars. They begin dating.

- (March 2) Lister, Cat, and Rimmer go through the stasis leak for the first time. Later that evening Rimmer comes back trying to save his own worthless hide.

- (March 3) Lister gets two weeks paint detail for the mushroom incident. Rimmer gets 8 weeks paint detail for sticking a pencil up the captain's nose and by eating his wife's photograph, thinking that it was a publicity shot from Planet of the Apes. Rimmer see his hologram counterpart, but believes that he is a hallucination. Lister and Cat go through the stasis leak so Lister can marry Kochanski. (They do, but Kochanski doesn't want to go with Lister, because her job comes first. Lister and Rimmer leave here back to Starbug.)

- (March 5) Frank Saunders, a crew member of Red Dwarf, dies and becomes the ship's hologram.

- (March 17) Rimmer had too much claret and fell asleep naked on his bunk. Lister takes a polaroid of his todger, drew a moustache, mouth and ears on it. He placed the picture on a bulletin board under "missing persons" written underneath "Have you seen this man? Believed to be a French movie star."

- (March 19) George McIntyre commits suicide, because of his excessive debts. Shortly thereafter, Saunders finds out that he is being shut off, because McIntyre out ranks him.

- (March 20) Red Dwarf returns to Mimas for a few days to get supplies. Kochanski breaks up with Lister, and goes out with her previous boyfriend, Tom, a catering officer. Lister, not being able to handle the breakup, leaves a note for Rimmer telling him that he is going on shore leave to Mimas. (Lister takes Frankenstein with him to the moon, so she doesn't get caught while he's away.)

- (March 22) Lister returns to the ship, and Rimmer believes that he was AWOL. Kochanski discovers that Lister brought the cat on board, but she tells him that he better not get caught or she can get into trouble. There is a funeral service for McIntyre, and his ashes are sent into space. Saunders hologram is turned off, and McIntyre's hologram is activated.

- (March 23) Rimmer takes the Astronavigation exam for the tenth time. He fails again. Lister is put into stasis for 18 months for bringing an unquarantined animal aboard the ship. The entire crew of Red Dwarf is killed due to exposure of cadium II. The exposure was caused by Arnold Rimmer doing a horrible job in sealing the drive plate.

2192
- Frankenstein dies at the age of 14. The Cat population is 198,832.

2224
- After the World Cup added rules for Genetic Alternative Sports, Scotland created a genetically engineered goal keeper that was 8 feet tall and 16 feet wide, thereby blocking the entire goal. Ironically, they still did not qualify for the second round.

2230
- Pluto's solstice, in which Pluto takes over Neptune as the outermost planet in the solar system.

c. 2250
- Famous physicists Heideker, Davrell, Holder, Quayle, and a fifth one, go into deep space to do experiments on collective intelligence. The results of these experiments was called Legion. Legion is a gestalt entity, which is a combination of individuals melded together to form one. (Over the years the physicists die off, and Legion became nothingness.)

2296
- Mechanoid Visual System, Version IX.05 from the Infomax Data Corporation is created. It is used in the Kryten series of mechanoids.

2340
- Professor Mamet is due to marry John Warburten, a fellow bio-engineer. He jilts her the day before the wedding, so she decides to create a droid in his image - a pompous, ridiculous-looking, mother-hen clucking irascible buffoon. That buffoon is the Series 4000 mechanoid series.

- Kryten 2X4B-523P, a 4000 series service mechanoid, is created by Professor Mamet at DivaDroid International. Around this time another 4000 series mechanoid from the 2X4C subseries is created. His name is Able.

c. 25^th-century
- Scientists discard the concept of a "family" when they prove that all hang ups in our neurosis are caused by our parents.

c. 28^th-century
- A top secret Space Corps. vessel containing a Time Drive is used to travel back in the past. The crew of the ship die from an influenza virus caught in the 20^th-century. Before dying they set the ship into deep space on autopilot and created a mind field generator around the vessel so no one would go near it.

4080
- It is finally proven that mankind is all alone in the universe. No other intelligent life exists anywhere in the universe.

c. 502,181
- The biggest and the strongest cats survived, the mutants. They had rudimentary fingers instead of claws and stood on their hind legs. The Felis Erectus was born.

2,002,181
- A plague hit, it was known as hunger. Less than thirty cat tribes now survived, roaming the cargo decks in search of food, but all the food was gone. Weak and ailing, they prayed at the supply hold's silver mountain: huge towering acres of metals rocks which the Cats believed watched over them. One cat took down a silver rock, and placed the V-shaped metal icon on the rim of the rock, and turned the handle. And the rock opened. And inside it was Alphabetti spaghetti in tomato sauce. And in the other rocks were other delights. God had spoken. Felis Sapiens was born.

2,502,181
- A holy war begins between the two cat factions. One cat faction believed that their god was named Cloister, and he wanted the sausage diner hats to be red, and the other faction thought that their god was named Clister and he wanted the hats to be blue.

2,504,181
- A truce was called and both factions built 2 arks to go and search for Fucial. They left the sick and lame cats behind on Red Dwarf. The first ark, blue, flew into an asteroid. But, the red ark, flew onward, knowing they were truly righteous.

- (+1 day) Lister discovers that he is a god to the cat people, and meets a dying priest who has lost his faith.

- (+1 day) Lister becomes sick, and passes out in the hallway. He goes to bed and has dreams that actually occur. From his dreams he created two men in the drive room, Confidence and Paranoia.

- (+2 days) Confidence destroys Paranoia and the medicom, so Lister can not get better. Outside the ship with Lister, Confidence takes his helmet off and explodes. Lister gets Kochanski's personality disc and activates it. But, it really is another Rimmer.

- (+3 days)(October) Rimmer moves out and next door with his duplicate.

- (+4 days) The two Rimmers begin arguing with each other.

- (+5 days) Lister is fed up with the arguing Rimmers and chooses to shut one off.

3,002,182
- The crew get a distress call from the Nova 5.

- (+1 day) They arrive on the Nova 5 to discover Kryten, the service mechanoid, taking care of three skeletons. The crew take Kryten back with them to Red Dwarf. Kryten becomes a "slave" of Rimmer, cleaning up he whole ship.

- (+2 days) Kryten rebels. He borrows Lister's space bike and fly around looking for a planet with an atmosphere, where he can build a garden.

- (Sunday) Lister goes into the hologram imaging chamber and gives Rimmer 8 months of his memory. He gives his an old girlfriend, Lise Yates.

- (Wednesday) Rimmer finds the letters that Lise sent to Lister. Lister tells Rimmer the truth about what he did. Rimmer very depressed has Lister erase the entire crew's memory of the last four days.

- (+1 day) Lister wakes up the next morning to discover that he had sex with his female counterpart, and discovers that he is pregnant.

- (3 days later) Both boys are eighteen years old because of their highly accelerated growth rates. Lister returns them to the universe of their origin, where they were reunited with their father (a woman).

- (4 months, since his crash) Lister rebuilds Kryten, but is unable to recapture his former personality.

3,002,183
- Kryten begins practices flying Starbug 2, so he can pass the flying exam.

- (+6 weeks) Kryten takes his flying exam, with Rimmer testing him. He flies Starbug into a time hole and sends them both into a backwards reality

- (+2 days) Cat and Kryten go search for Rimmer and Lister.

- (Monday) Rimmer convinces Lister to do a mindswap, for 2 weeks, in order to get Lister fit. Lister fed up with Rimmer abusing his body forces him to mindswap.

- A homing pod arrives from DivaDroid International, saying that Kryten will be shutdown in 24 hours and his replacement is on it's way. The crew decide to let Kryten go out in style. So, they throw him a party in the Officer's Lounge.

- (+1 day) Kryten's replacement, Hudson 10, arrives. His sanity circuit is worn out and attempts to kill the entire crew just to deactivate Kryten. Kryten convinces Hudson that there is no such place a Silicon Heaven, and Hudson deactivates, because he can't cope with that fact.

- (-11 days) Rimmer begins a 10-day trip through the diesel decks.

- (-1 day) Rimmer returns from his trip. Rimmer and The Cat, find a pod floating in the local asteroid belt.

- The cat starts the thaw process on the pod. Fearing that it may contain a killer Simulan, they take the pod to the penal colony that it was heading toward. On the way there, Lister's head explodes, thus causing the space mumps to go away. When the crew arrive on the penal colony they are forced to go through a mind probe to see if they have committed any criminal acts. Rimmer is sentenced for more than 9,000 in prison for murdering the entire Red Dwarf crew.

- (Thursday) Kryten and Rimmer begin the 5 day round trip journey to the cargo decks to get supplies.

3,002,385
- (Spring) Kryten tries to wake Lister from deep sleep, but Lister insists on another three months.

- Starbug is now almost 24 hours behind Red Dwarf. Starbug gets caught in a malfunctioning guidance beam and are taken to a space station. There they meet Legion, a gestalt entity. Legion rebuilds Rimmer's light bee, making him a hard light hologram. He tells the crew that they cannot leave the station.

- (Last Thursday) Lister is having a few beers, and is too lazy to get up. So he uses the release mechanism on the escape pod, and it escapes!

- (Present) Kryten discovers minute amounts of millennium oxide in the system. Starbug has entered a Rogue Simulan zone. The Rogue Simulans catch up with Starbug, and knock all four crew members unconscious. They upgrade Starbug to make it more of a "fair" fight.

- (+2 weeks since Gunmen of the Apocalypse) Starbug returns to the Simulan ship to pick up supplies and fuel. One of the Simulans discovers them and attempts to kill them. Rimmer escapes in the escape pod, thus causing the ship to disintegrate. The rest of the crew use a teleporter, that they found on the ship, and escape back to Starbug. Rimmer is forced to go through a worm hole. (Due to time dialation he will have to wait 600 years on a S3 planet waiting for the rest of the crew to get him. For them it will only be a few hours.) While on the planet Rimmer creates an entire race of himselves from cloning his DNA. The rest of the crew arrive and are arrested for being brave and honest. In the cell they find the real Rimmer, who has been in there for 557 years. They all escape using the teleporter.

- (+3 days) The crew arrive at Gemini 12, a Space Corps. ship that has equipped in it a Time Drive. They attach the Time Drive to Starbug and see if it works. Another Starbug arrives and it is themselves from 15 years into the future. Their future selves need to copy parts off of the Time Drive to make their own work properly again. Lister, determine not to become like their future counterparts removes them from their ship. Their future counterparts decide to attack knowing that they would never want to have been like their past selves. During the battle the present version of Lister and The Cat are killed in combat while Kryten goes off-line. Rimmer tries to destroy the Time Drive before he is killed. Just as he shoots the Time Drive, Starbug is hit and . . . . Because Rimmer destroyed the Time Drive before they were killed, they survived. But the time line was unstable so both realities merged to form a paradox. So the time line was corrected before the crew got the Time Drive, and Starbug's cargo deck increased by 212%. The laser cannon breached the main water tank and flooded Supply Deck B, and destroyed all the Indian food and lager supplies.

3,002,386
- (Friday) Lister urinates on Rimmer from D Deck.

- (Wednesday) The ship passes a red moon.

- (Thursday) Lister tries to do a ship's log explaining about the incident with their future selves. During his report, the camera explodes. (It's the third one this week.)

- (Friday) Kryten finally gets enough courage (and the supplies in the kitchen were finally depleted) to tell Lister that all the Indian food supplies are gone and there is no more lager. Lister tries to convince Kryten to go back to Gemini 12 and pick up the Time Drive, so they can go and pick up a two-year supply of curries. Kryten doesn't think they should alter the time line, due to causality. Kryten goes off-line for 12 hours to disguard some old cache files. While doing this, Lister replaces Kryten's head with Sparehead 2, and removes his guilt chip and disables his behavior protocols.

- (Saturday) Lister asks Kryten again if they can make "a curry run to the 22nd-century." Kryten, now agrees so the crew set a course back to the Gemini 12.

- (Monday, 9 days later) The crew arrive at Gemini 12, and get the Time Drive and set it for the "closest curry shop." They accidentally land in November, 1963, during the Kennedy assassination.

- (Anniversary of the day Kryten was found by the crew) Kryten finally gets the lobster meal prepared for the crew. Kochanski lures the crew to go into the AR machine to try out the new software. Kryten gets feed up with waiting for them to eat the meal he prepared, so he goes in there and "kicks" them out. While eating dinner, Lister asks for brown ketchup for his meal. Kryten can't believe this and his head explodes. They put on his sparehead, and that explodes too. Fortunately, they still had the RAM chips and now need to get a new head for him.

- (+1 day) Kryten discovers that Lister has the epideme virus. The virus is a man-made parasite created as a rival to the nicotine patch. It was intelligent, and was designed to block all the neural signals to nicotine cravings, unfortunately, it also block all signals telling the body it needs blood and oxygen. Kryten puts an anti-body in Lister forcing the bacteria into his right arm. They slice off his arm, but still some of the virus escapes into his body. Lister, determined to destroy the virus before it destroys him, goes back to the Leviation and plans to blow it up. He finds out that there might be a cure on Delta 7, but that is far away. Kryten finds out from Epideme that there is a way to make Starbug's engines 300% faster.

- (+2 days) Starbug arrives at Delta 7. They find out that it was destroyed a long time ago. The crew decide to stop Lister's heart to give him more time to live. Lister, zombified, transfers the virus into Kochanski. It wasn't her arm, but Carmen's arm. They revive Lister, who is safe from the virus.

- (+1 week, 2 days) Lister is still trying to cope with his right arm being gone. Kryten finds a 21st-century mechanical arm and attaches it to Lister. Lister has trouble using it at first, but his subconscious eventually takes over and it "attacks" Kryten. Kryten explains that his body once had nanobots, small mechnical machines that can repair carbon objects. But the last time he had them

- (Some time later, Wednesday) The crew are awakened, when they arrive around a planet. In orbit around the planet is Red Dwarf! The nanobots took over Red Dwarf and sealed it into a planetoid, before making a sub-atomic version of Red Dwarf. (That was what the crew was following all this time.) Kryten finds the nanobots and orders them to repair the ship and give Lister his arm back. They give Lister is arm back, but also make him into a steroid filled muscular person too. They return Red Dwarf to them, but when the cat flies Starbug into the ship, they find that the ship is several times larger than normal! Lister's body returns to it's normal size. Starbug gets sucked into a vent. Red Dwarf starts to shrink to it's normal size. Starbug tries to escape the vents and is finally destroyed. (It turned out that Holly recreated the nanobots so they could recreate the ship.) The nanobots also recreated the entire crew. Lister is accused of stealing and crashing a Starbug, having no pilot's license, and smuggling 2 stowaways on board along with Kochanski. He is put on quarters arrest. He tries to convince the recreated Rimmer (who is alive) to help him escape, by giving him access to the crew's confidential files so he can make rank. A physchological review is done on Kryten and it is determined that he should be reset to factory settings. Rimmer goes to the remains of Starbug and gets the confidential files, he also stumbles over the sexual magnetism and luck viruses. He tests the sexual magnetism out to see if it really works. Rimmer goes back to his quarters and and reads up on the files. He goes to the captain's office and gives him a report on new safety procedures for drive plate repairs, a muffin to help him celebrate his wedding anniversary and by giving him bile cream. The captain is suspicious of Rimmer's new found intelligence he gives him an envelope that is an invitation to the Captain's table. (Rimmer licks the envelope that has psychotropic drugs on it.) He is placed in a Artifical Reality machine so his actions can be watched. A medical examination is done on Kryten and he is reclassified as a woman.

- (+1 day, since last event. Thursday) The foursome go to the inquiry and agree to have psychotropic drugs used for a mindscan. They sign a form agreeing to this and lick the envelopes (which have the drugs unknowingly placed on it.) They are placed in AR also so they can be watched.

- (+2 days, Friday) The crew are found innocent on the original charges, and removed from the AR. But, they are found guilty on using confidential files and get a statatory sentence of 2 years. The foursome are taken to the brig (known as "The Tank") on floor 13. During their orientation Lister pours the rest of the tube of sexual magnetism on Rimmer, making him attractive to all of the other inmates. The prisoners are taken to their quarters to rest up for their first day of work. Rimmer is upset at Lister for what he did and won't talk to him. Lister tries to make him say something and it finally works.

- (+1 day, Tuesday) The warden gets mugged and his glass eye is stolen.

- (+2 days, Wednesday) The warden asks the prisoner who stole his eye to return or all of the privileges will be revoked. Rimmers tells on the prisoner who stole the eye, so it would help the appeal look good. Kryten gets kidnapped by Kill Crazy and is reprogrammed. Kryten performs "Krytie TV", the first show is done in the woman's shower.

(+3 days, Thursday) Lister plans on giving Kochanski 2 bags of flour to apologize for watching the shower incident. (2 bags of flour = flowers!) Kryten lies to Lister telling him that the women found out about the shower incident and kicked him out. He was reclassified as a man and moved in with Rimmer and Lister. He then tells Lister that Kochanski and her ex-boyfriend, Tim, are going out tonight and tells him how to sabotage Tim's quarters. Lister does what Kryten said, but finds out that it's actually the warden's quarters. With Rimmer's help, Lister helps clean teh quarters. They chase down and capture Kryten and reprogram him back to the way he was.

- (+1 day) Rimmer and Lister report to the captain's office for the basketball incident and are put on spud duty for 2 weeks. They have Bob the skutter steal a programmable virus, so they can program it to peel the potatoes. Meanwhile, the canaries go to the SS Manny Celeste to locate 2 missing canary batallions. They find the batallions frozen in time, caused by Tempest, a time wand. They send the batallion back in time before they found the wand, and smuggle it aboard the ship.

- (+7 months 2 weeks since "Ouroboros") Kochanski places the invitro tube, with Lister's "deposit", into the ship's uteral simulation chamber.

3,002,387
- (+16 months 2 weeks since "Ouroboros") Baby Lister is born.

- (+18 months since "Ouroboros") Lister uses the Time Drive and takes the baby version of himself, age 6 weeks, back to 2155. He places the child in a box, marked "Ouroboros", under a pool table at the Aigburth Arms in Liverpool.

3,002,400
- The crew of the Starbug, with the Time Drive, travel back 15 years to meet themselves. They need to copy components off of the Time Drive to make their own work properly again. Their past selves destroy the Time Drive, so this even doesn't happen.

3,002,526
- Lister, age 171, appears as a future echo from here urging the younger Lister to take a picture of his twin sons.

3,002,536
- Lister, age 181, dies trying to remove a bra with his teeth.

END OF TIME
- The Inquisitor, a self-repairing simulant, living million of years alone comes to the conclusion that there is no God, no afterlife, and the only purpose of existence is lead a worth-wild life. He constructs a time machine and travels through space and time and erases all those who wasted their life and replaces them with people who never had the chance of life.