McName

McName	McSlang	Description	Pros	Cons	Eaten By
Big Mac	Mac	£1.99 Two pieces of regular meat (1/10th of a pound) in a three-part bun (crown has probably been on the floor). Dressed with pickle sauce, rehydrated onions, lettuce (normally everywhere but in the burger), two pickles (gherkins) and a slice of cheese. Called a Mac yet it is served in ‘Mc’Donalds?	With all those pickles you probably cannot taste the meat (this really is a good thing).	The pickles taste filthy anyway. The sauce and lettuce make great lubrication meaning the meat in your Mac will soon be falling out on the floor.	Skinheaded guys who want to prove they are big boys by eating the most outrageous thing on the menu, and who don’t mind having sauce all over their hands/clothes when they’ve finished.
Mega Mac	Mega	£2.99 Exactly the same as a Big Mac but for an extra two-pieces of regular meat bringing the total up to four. As tall the world trade centre and will fall apart about as quickly.	Wooow two more bits of meat for just £1.	Mega Mac=mega greasy. The bun will usually have dissolved in fat by the time you get to eat it.	As the Mac eater only more silly and actually wants to get sauce all over his clothes.
Hamburger	Ham or reg	59p the bread and butter burger, one piece of regular meat in a toasted (burned to a cinder) bun dressed with mustard, ketchup, rehydrated onions and a pickle.	Buy four and you get more food than in a mega Mac for less money, plus none of that pickle sauce shite.	You can taste the rubbery filthiness of the meat and when you bite into the pickle you may want to puke. In fact very dangerous as all those pickles thrown on the dining area floor are the most common cause of slipping.	Townies, druggies and anyone else jobless. They don’t care about the bad taste, they just want something to munch while they sit on the benches outside and wait for their turn on the fag being passed.
Cheeseburger	Cheese or reg	69p A hamburger with a slice of cheese on it of course	Mnnn cheese	You don’t know when that bag of cheese was opened.	As above only those who want to out do their friends who could only afford a hamburger.
Double Cheeseburger	Double	99p As cheeseburger only an extra piece of meat and cheese on offer here.	More filling than a single burger	You’re being filled with more than twice as much grease.	The older townie and students. Those who are off to ‘grab a quick bit to eat’, and care not about coronary heart disease.
Quarter Pounder	Quart’r	£2.49 The daddy cheeseburger. A sesame seed bun (will definitely be burned) with mustard, ketchup, real onions, two pickles and two slices of cheese.	Surprisingly it is ¼ pound.	Though not sure you can call it meat.	Your Dad, (teenage or otherwise). And Sensible people who really don’t want eat here but have been forced to.
Chicken Sandwich	Sarny	£1.99 A reconstituted chicken patty in a sesame seed bun dressed with ‘sandwich sauce’ (you thought it was mayonnaise didn’t you?) and lettuce.	At least it tastes like chicken	The standing times for chicken are worrying and your sarny may have been cooked well over an hour before you eat it. The lettuce may have turned brown in this time. What the fuck is sandwich sauce?	Young girls. Almost all girls prefer a chicken sandwich to a burger. Maybe they think they are healthier; but unfortunately they contain as much fat as a quarter pounder.
Chicken Premier	Premier	£2.80!! An actual real chicken breast spoiled with some crispy coating. In a focaccia bun (doesn’t that sound good, well it would be if the bun didn’t go stale immediately) dressed with salsa sauce, sour cream and chive sauce, and lettuce.	People will think you know about food when you explain it has a focaccia bread bun.	Way over priced even if it is real meat for once. Not demanded much so will have stood in the kitchen longer than a crewmember told by a manager to ‘wait there I’ll be back in a minute’.	People who want to eat ‘proper food’ but know nothing about ‘proper food’.
Chicken Nuggets	Bag or box x	Reconstituted chicken in the same coating as a chicken sandwich patty. Usually turn grey after being held in the kitchen too long.	They are the nicest tasting thing there is on the menu.	You’ll still be hungry when you’ve finished them.	Female students as the main part of their meal, or fat bastards who have a box of 9 nuggets to go with the mega mac meal and three cheeseburgers they’ve already ordered.