TITLE: Through Drunken Eyes
AUTHOR: Leah
EMAIL:fraser@escape.ca
DISCLAIMER: All the characters in the following story belong to Joss Whedon and co. I own the story idea and the story itself. This is solely for entertainment purposes.
RATING: PG
WARNINGS: Alcohol abuse.
SUMMARY: A story from Spike's point of view. I think the title explains the rest.

Through Drunken Eyes

I stumbled as I walked into the convenience store. Tripped on the bloody

doorframe. I don't think it's an accurate description to call vampires

stealthy. Most of the time I was a complete and total klutz.

The store owner looked up as I crashed into the side of the door. He looked

worried. I raised my hand to reassure him that I was fine. Stupid mortal,

he would probably call the cops because I had fallen. If you trip, you're

automatically dubbed as a drunk.

I giggled. Okay, so maybe I was a little drunk. It means nothing in this

world.

I raked one of my hands through my hair and wondered how far the dye had

grown out now. It had been ages since Drusilla had bleached my hair. It was

probably almost all dark now.

"Spike." Someone spoke from behind me and I turned in surprise. The slayer

stood there and she didn't look happy. In fact, she looked downright

pissed.

"What?" I asked, giving her the same look she was giving me.

"What are you doing here?" Buffy placed her hands on her hips and glared at

me.

"I'm shopping." I sneered at her, curling my upper lip. "Can't a guy go out

to buy some bloody milk anymore?" I asked.

She rolled her eyes. "And why is it that I don't believe you?"

"Beyond me pet." I said, my words slurring. The way Buffy was standing

suddenly struck me as funny and I placed my hands on my hips to imitate

her. She wasn't happy.

"Listen blood sucker," she began, pointing directly in my face.

I grinned and brought my finger up to point at her. That pissed her off

even more.

She slapped my finger away and lowered hers. "Just get out of here."

"I'm buying milk!" I protested, raising my voice.

"Sure you are." She retorted.

"Milk!" I grabbed the nearest thing I could find and held it up.

"Diapers?" Buffy asked and nodded. "Sure Spike."

I looked at the package I held in my hand and then threw it onto the floor.

"I just want milk. My baby wants some warm milk to put her to sleep."

The slayer sighed. "Well, maybe your baby should get off her ass and get it

herself."

I smiled. "But she's my princess."

"You're drunk." Buffy said. "I'm gonna get you out of here."

She moved forward to grab my arm but I moved out of her way and glanced

around.

"Tell me Buffy," I began, wondering if my words made sense any longer,

"does my hair look good? I really can't see it myself."

"It's a little long." She answered. "But other than that, it's fine."

I nodded, wondering if my head would ever stop shaking if I let it keep

going, then smiled again. "I want some milk Buffy. Can you get me some

milk?"

The slayer's mouth tightened into a slit. I knew she was getting mad now.

"Please?" I tried to bat my eyes at her but instead I just ended up

laughing hysterically instead.

"Here." Buffy turned and opened the dairy case next to us. She pulled out a

carton of milk and shoved it in my direction. I took it from her, knowing

it would slip from my hands as soon as I got it.

It fell to the floor and the carton split. Milk was everywhere. I knew I

needed to stop drinking. It really wasn't good for my system.

As the milk splattered all over the floor, Buffy glared at me as I tried to

walk away. It turns out, milk is rather slippery. My feet slid out from

under me and I hit the floor with a crack, my elbow making contact with the

hard linoleum. For some reason, it just made me laugh harder. I had way too

much alcohol in my body.

"What the hell is going on?" I heard the store owner shout at us and Buffy

glanced up in alarm.

"If you get me in trouble," she didn't finish her threat as he ran over to

where we were and looked at the mess.

"I should never have let you come in here." He said to me threateningly. I

smiled at him from where I lay in the puddle of milk. He didn't look

amused. Both the owner and Buffy were staring at me, their hands placed on

their hips.

I tried to tighten my throat, I tried to do anything to keep the laughter

from bubbling out but I couldn't. My eyes began to water as I opened my

mouth and began to laugh. I slammed my palm down on the wet floor,

splattering milk all over my jacket.

"Get out." The store owner threatened. "Get out of here."

He bent down and yanked me up by the collar of my jacket. I continued to

giggle as he pulled me toward the door.

"You too." He said to Buffy and nodded his head toward the front entrance.

She gaped at him. "Me? What did I do?"

"Just get out." He demanded, then shoved me out the door.

My foot caught the door frame and I stumbled into the parking lot, falling

again on my throbbing elbow. Moments later I watched as he pushed Buffy out

the door. She was coming toward me too fast to stop and her feet got

entangled in mine. I laughed again as the slayer hit the pavement next to

me.

"He threw you out on your ass." I said, stifling my laughter.

"Only because of you." She protested.

I shrugged. "He still kicked you out." I sat up and began to chant in a

sing-song voice. "Buffy got kicked out of the sto-ore. Buffy got kicked out

of the sto-re."

"Shut up Spike." She retaliated, standing up.

I grinned. "Big words for such a little girl."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Try the stupid lines another time Spike. I just

want to go home."

"Then go home." I told her and lay flat on my back in the handicap parking

stall. I stared up at the stars and they suddenly reminded me of Drusilla.

She'd be wondering where I was.

"You never listen to anyone, do you?" Buffy asked. "You do everything your

own way."

"I did it myyyyyy way." I answered, singing to her.

She sighed in exasperation. "Just get up and go home." She said. "I want to

leave."

"So leave." I told her, imitating her voice.

I was surprised when she leaned foward and hoisted me off the ground. She

wrapped my arm around her shoulders and began to drag me in the direction

of my apartment. She was strong enough, she could carry me.

"Myyyyyy waaaaay." I sang loudly, hoping to disuade her from taking me

home.

Buffy stopped and turned toward me. I grinned at her, my faces only inches

from hers. Suddenly, before I knew what I was doing, I moved forward.

Buffy dropped me to the ground. I hit the grass hard and groaned as my

lungs constricted painfully.

"Not even in your dreams Spike." She said, then laughed and began to walk

away.

I smiled up at the sky again. "Not even in my dreams eh?" I wondered, then

stood up shakily. "Nope, not in my dreams slayer," I said, although I knew

she was gone, "in my dreams I'm usually killing you." As I walked away I

paused to think about it. "Or I'm singing with the Sex Pistols. I haven't

really decided which one I'd rather do."

The End