The Story of My Spiritual Journey


My Story

I never liked the word testimony. I always thought that a testimony needed to be about some dramatic event, a moment in time when our life was changed. Some people do experience this type of conversion. I have had some dramatic moments in my life, but my story is one of a lifetime of growth. Our Father apprehended me very early in my life, and His guiding hand has been visible from the very beginning.

The word testimony has taken on a whole new meaning to me. To give a testimony means to be a witness to something. By sharing our story, we act as a witness to the love of God. Only God can give you the faith to believe in Him and act accordingly, but I pray that as I share my own faith story you will be blessed and will pursue your own relationship with God.

As far back as I can remember, Jesus has been a part of my life. My relationship with Him was childish in my youth, praying for stuff like snow days and my Christmas wishes. My church home was Redeemer Lutheran in Allentown, PA. I am thankful for the role they played as God built a foundation of true faith, with Christ as the cornerstone.

My teenage/early adult years were pretty typical. I went to school, got decent grades, and tried to survive puberty. I was never the most popular kid, although there were a few friends who were very important. When I was sixteen, a drunk driver killed one of my best friends. Depression set in pretty deep at that time, though the Holy Spirit drew me into prayer for the safety of those I loved. At 17 or so, God called me into ministry. I talked to some people I greatly respected, and they told me it was a difficult road. Since I prefer to travel the easy road, I chose to attend Kutztown University to become an Elementary School Teacher.

Big mistake. Though God had given me a talent for teaching, I was not following the path He had ordained for my life. I finished school and got a terrific job in retail management, living on the fast track to success. Marriage and children were not in my vocabulary. I moved into an apartment of my own. For two years, I lived a single life -- drinking too much, sleeping around a bit. My rebel years were rather boring and tame, but sin is sin.


Then one day, God said, "I have something better for you." That's when I met Bruce. As I look back at those rebel years, I can see that God was never far away, but my life was filled with stress and uncertainty. We know that God uses all things for the good of those who love Him. At this juncture, God showed me what my life really looked like, and reminded me of His love and forgiveness. He drew me back into a relationship with Him and set me on His path again. Bruce and I were married and set up our home in California.

Though I knew God's presence throughout my life, one event stands as a testament to God's power. Ten days after we were married, Bruce was due to leave California for two months temporary duty in England. The night before he was set to leave, I got physically ill. The thought that Bruce was going to die kept running through my head. I spent the night in prayer, begging God to save him. I made deals with God. I was angry. After all, Bruce was my gift! How could God take him away after such a short period of time? The next day, with Bruce at the airport, I sat at home and cried. By the time his airplane was to depart, I felt like death. At the moment his plane was to take off, the phone rang. It was Bruce. His plane was delayed a day. At that moment, the pain was released. The next day, there was no pain or the torment of fear. The miracle that day was more than just the saving of Bruceís life. God was there with me, He changed my life, teaching me the power of prayer and the knowing that I can trust Him completely.


God blessed us with two terrific children, a wonderful church, and a good life in California. As is typical with the military, the time came for us to move. We'd heard rumours that the people and equipment from our base would be transferred, so we tried to take control of the situation. We worried about everything. Where would we go? Could we sell the house? The worrying got us no where. We tried for several good jobs, but failed each time. One day I finally gave up. I said, "Father, you know what is best, deal with this." Within a week, we had orders to Washington, the house was in the process of being sold, and everything fell perfectly into place. I learned that I should not worry, that I should trust in Him.


We became active in a church in Spokane, but circumstances led us to start attending the military chapel on our base. This was a great blessing, because I learned so much about other denominations and religions. I have long been aware of the importance of ecumenical ministries, but the military chapel gave me the opportunity to see it in action. This was happening at the same time that I discovered the Internet, and the Christian Chat halls. My experiences in the chapel and the Internet have helped me learn to study the scriptures for myself, looking deeper into the Word to see the Truth of God's love and mercy. God has shown me that there is so much more to being a Christian than going to church on a Sunday morning and taking a Bible class occasionally. I needed to recognize that it is Christ in me, doing God's mercy through me which manifests the fruit of His Holy Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. This is the life God has called us to live.

Then it was time for another move. We had a choice, retirement or a four-year tour in England. We chose England. What a joy this has been! We have traveled all over the country, enjoying the history, culture and beauty around us. We've had the opportunity to worship in 1000-year-old churches. We have walked through ancient monuments that are thousands of years old.

Our time here has been more than a vacation overseas, though. It has been a time of spiritual awakening. In the spring of 1998, the Lord directed me to begin a prayer ministry. I studied prayer, began to pray regularly, and asked others to join me. Through that prayer ministry, the Lord has touched me so deeply, so personally, so completely... He changed me into a new woman. I was once His child, but now I am His bride. I see the world through new eyes, which are His. I speak of His love with a new voice, which is His. Iíve learned that He lives in me, using me as His vessel. He is doing His mercy through me. God has renewed His call to me, and I am being obedient now. My desire is to serve Him, in His way, in His time. It is all for His Glory. Praise the Lord.

My story is far from over. Each day God draws me closer to Him as I walk in faith. Even this website is a testament to God's hand in my life. I hope that as you read the pages of devotionals and Bible studies, you too will come to understand God's presence in your life and walk in obedience to His voice.

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