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stuff is hard and cutting into my gym time” - Blames
(Washington, D.C. – 1/2/09) Although LL
was unable to contact President-Elect Obama directly, we were able to conduct
this spurious interview with one of his campaign staffers regarding a seeming
increase of world-wide discontent since the election, instead of the peace and
Said the staffer on condition of anonymity, “I
spoke with Obama this morning and he reflected increasing frustration with the
state of the world. He told me this President stuff is so difficult, it's
seriously cutting into his gym time. I mean, come on, he was elected on promises
of lowering the oceans, tax increases on only those making over $250k, I mean,
$200k, I mean, $150k, health care for all, a Prius in every garage, overall
world peace and free money for everyone."
"The increase in violence has him flummoxed.
Israel/Hamas, inner-city violence, now the startling revelation that global
warming will cause a new ice age. How in the world are we going to have a
photogenic, finely chiseled, six-pack ab President if his hair actually does
turn gray and he’s stuck in the Oval Office dealing with these issues rather
than working out?”
"We think these world-wide problems were
carefully choreographed by the opposition party, at a time of transition, to
make Obama look bad."
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