September 11, 2001
"It's like a dorm storm, where you get every person on campus to call the White House and just say 'No violent retribution' until all their phones are jammed for hours and finally they have to say they got your message and shut the lines down."
"What do you think this picture is?"
"'A pregnant stick.'"
"That's what one girl thought; what do you think?"
"It's a bell curve."
"It's a snake eating an elephant! Didn't you read 'The Little Prince'?"
"Thank you for making me giggle."
"I have to go find some people who need help, since I don't think I'm one of them."
--Dr. Mark, at ground zero when the second tower fell
"Eat your vitamin C. I don't want you to get scurvy!"
"Is that going around?"
"You don't add anything to my guacamole. Don't mess with avacado, man."
"This movie is set in Missoula! That's where I did my student teaching."
"Was that a rural experience? ...What?"
"You just made such a PC comment! 'Was that a rural experience?'"
"You've never been to Montana, have you, Mindy."
"We didn't follow procedure because there is no procedure.
There's nothing in the book about dealing with hostile airliners."
--military defending the Pentagon's willingness to shoot down civilian aircraft
"The Common Ground fair is this weekend, for all you hippie types."
"Green be mighty!"
"This really is the perfect bag of popcorn... I thought you were just saying that
because you're drunk, but there's not a single unpopped kernel in here!"
"Do you know how hard it is to find an American flag these days?
All the stores are sold out. It's never been so in to be patriotic."
"This guacamole is so good that it's worth eating the chips to have it."
"I can't believe you don't like chips. That's like not liking..."
"Carin, I drank the whole bottle!"
"I don't doubt it!"
"Yeah, you're making it really subtle."
"I'm so glad we have daughters. Somehow I don't think this is a good time to have 19- and 22-year-old sons."
"I'm just fulfilling a fantasy."
"'What do you do at night after evening lesson?' 'We like to dress up in drag.'"
"We sound like a popcorn commercial. 'I thought she was drunk, but no!'"
"'It really is perfect!'"
"I can't believe you guys are still talking about the popcorn."