Anonymous Testimony

Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!

Testimonials to the Providence of God

By
Me

CHRISTIAN THEOLOGY I

CHR 411

10/2006

Outline

I INTRO: Testimonials To the Providence OF God

II My Testimony

A. His Son: Sacrifice for our salvation: Jesus movie

B. His Word on: Grandma’s Bible

C. His Fellowship: The importance of persevering and earnest Prayer with thanksgiving.

D. His Presence: The ultimate provision Ex 33:15 Felt, tangible, evident. Often found on the heals of fervent prayer.

III Their Testimonies: Grudem, Colson, etc

n A. Preservation: Copyist under God’s Providence or preservation (Smith)

n B. Government: God is sovereign and worthy of trust. Evil allowed but ultimately His glory revealed and His purposes prevail

IV Conclusion

n A. Many ways to analyze, categorize, represent, and observe His Providence

n B. To know His Providence first hand is to come to believe in Him and accept Christ as our Savior.

n C. His Providence is revealed through bible study and prayer as we live our life for His glory as He designed. God’s Providence is True and Everlasting.

Testimonials to the Providence of God

As I think about the providence of God, I see a torrent of memories, like a raging river, overwhelm the floodgates of mind. Each vision and recollection competes to be the first to testify to His goodness and providence in my life. Or should I say the life of His servant? Truly as these images float about, I pause and recall each and every flash of time in my short 33 year lifespan and a wellspring of thanksgiving erupts within me thanking him anew for His wondrous way, His awesome presence, His tender mercies and His wonderful love.

Where do I begin? God is so awesome! Every fortunate event, every victorious circumstance, every trial overcome, every change ever made within, every beautiful revelation and blessing is His providence! His providence is evident everywhere we look, however, we can see Him magnified through the lenses of three precious gifts: His word (which reveals God), His Son (who demonstrated Him and His love) and prayer (by which we can be joined to Him in fellowship.

I do not mean to oversimplify or minimalize His providence by summarizing every single act of His through these three avenues; on the contrary, I desire to highlight these as the main highways of access to getting to know Him intimately. What else is there? His Word, His Son, and our relationship to Him. His providence reflects His nature and qualities; these qualities are harmonious with everything found in Scripture!

“Reformed theologians have tended to distinguish between God’s ordinary and extraordinary providence (McLaughlin).” I would like to discuss both His “extraordinary” providence while mentioning several perspectives concerning His “ordinary” providence with an interspersing of Scripture. In this way I hope that a complete picture may begin to unfold concerning the tremendous scope of the Providence of God.

God’s works of providence are his most holy, wise, and powerful preserving and governing all his creatures, and all their actions” (Westminster Shorter Catechism Q.11). If Creation was a unique exercise of divine energy causing the world to be, providence is a continued exercise of that same energy whereby the Creator, according to his own will, (a) keeps all creatures in being, (b) involves himself in all events, and (c) directs all things to their appointed end. The model is of purposive personal management with total “hands-on” control: God is completely in charge of his world. His hand may be hidden, but his rule is absolute.

Some have restricted God’s providence to foreknowledge without control, or upholding without intervention, or general oversight without concern for details, but the testimony to providence as formulated above is overwhelming (Ilumina).

I was about 4 years old when I met Jesus at the movies. Allow me to explain. The Greatest Story Ever Told was televised as a two part mini-series. I loved the movie and was totally engrossed in its story, but nobody prepared me for the ending! When Jesus was nailed to the cross, I held my breath believing God would rescue His Son off the cross. The moment Jesus breathed His last I pitched a serious fit. I became utterly inconsolable crying and crying out to mom and dad, “Why did Jesus have to die?” I was so distraught I missed His resurrection!

My dad found humor in my distress yet at the same time tried to console me, “Stop crying it’s only a movie,” he said. “But Dad, you said it was a true story!” I yelled, stomping my foot. After being sent to my room, I cried and wondered why Jesus was sacrificed for us. I felt like I owed Him my life. It was this movie that had me asking questions of my parents about God, the Bible, and Jesus.

The next day, I asked my mom while she combed my hair if God was stronger than daddy. I will never forget that she told me, “Oh yes, He is way bigger and stronger than your dad.” I decided right then this was someone I wanted to know.

God has provided resources from his own character to those who seek him. John 6:35 . . . Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. No one who comes to me will ever be hungry again.” Our deepest hunger is met not by bread but by the filling of our hearts with the love and power of Christ himself. Ephesians 1:6-8 . . . He is so rich in kindness that he purchased our freedom through the blood of his Son, and our sins are forgiven.

Through the riches of his grace God has provided for our greatest need-forgiveness of sin and salvation in Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:3-4 . . . As we know Jesus better, his divine power gives us everything we need for living a godly life (Ilumina).

At age 9, I discovered my Grandma’s old Bible in the toy bin of our attic and begin to read it avidly. I would define this as one little example of God’s Providence. Wayne Grudem states that His Providence can be understood under the categorizations of “preservation, concurrence, and government” which address any number of beneficial occurrences. According to my professor, God’s Providence can be seen in the “inspiration, revelation, interpretation, and preservation” of the Bible and that His Inspiration is “divine, supernatural, and intimate.” When speaking of Providence, Charles Colson defines Providence as a belief “that God has a purpose for history and that He works this purpose out through people’s lives.”

The Bible clearly teaches God’s providential control (1) over the universe at large, Ps. 103:19; Dan. 4:35; Eph. 1:11; (2) over the physical world, Job 37; Ps. 104:14; 135:6; Matt. 5:45; (3) over the brute creation, Ps. 104:21, 28; Matt. 6:26; 10:29; (4) over the affairs of nations, Job 12:23; Ps. 22:28; 66:7; Acts 17:26; (5) over man’s birth and lot in life, 1 Sam. 16:1; Ps. 139:16; Isa. 45:5; Gal. 1:15-16; (6) over the outward successes and failures of men’s lives, Ps. 75:6, 7; Luke 1:52; (7) over things seemingly accidental or insignificant, Prov. 16:33; Matt. 10:30; (8) in the protection of the righteous, Ps. 4:8; 5:12; 63:8; 121:3; Rom. 8:28; (9) in supplying the wants of God’s people, Gen. 22:8, 14; Deut. 8:3; Phil. 4:19; (10) in giving answers to prayer, 1 Sam. 1:19; Isa. 20:5, 6; 2 Chron. 33:13; Ps. 65:2; Matt. 7:7; Luke 18:7, 8; and (11) in the exposure and punishment of the wicked, Ps. 7:12-13; 11:6. (L. Berkhof, Systematic Theology, 4th ed.)

Again: things that are done contravene God’s will of command—yet they fulfill his will of events (Eph. 1:11). Again: humans mean what they do for evil—yet God who overrules uses their actions for good (Gen. 50:20; Acts 2:23). Again: humans, under God’s overruling, sin—yet God is not the author of sin (James 1:13-17); rather, he is its judge (Ilumina).

This brings me to my next topic: Prayer. The bible is full of prayer and stories where prayer has influenced lives. Avid prayer results in divine fellowship with total assurance. Prayer is where God becomes real to us. I must say this because God became very real to me in prayer. I share this testimony to show how great God is and everything is for His Glory alone.

My earliest memory of praying earnestly was as a Kindergartener, begging God to make Dad stop viciously hitting my mom and brother who was 5 years old at the time. My prayers were answered in a way I didn’t want or expect. Within a year, Mom got the opportunity to leave my dad and took all of my siblings (Samuel age 5, Cynthia age 3, Vern age 2, and Aaron 2 months old). My sister Michelle (age 4) and I (age 6) were left behind only because Dad took us with him to a legal appointment in hopes of preventing mom’s anticipated flight. [NOT THEIR REAL NAMES]

For 10 years my sister and I suffered terrible random and torturous beatings due to his senseless outbursts of rage. During this time, I prayed almost daily for a happy reunion with my mom and “the kids”. In my early to late teens, I struggled with thoughts of suicide, hopelessness, and fantasies of reporting my father to the authorities. I remember begging God to explain the 5^th commandment to me, asking Him “God, must we honor our parents even if they are wrong and acting evil?” I remember coming to the conclusion that there was no criteria for disobeying the 5^th commandment. I refrained daily from turning my dad into the authorities, telling God I was doing it for Him. I would honor my dad because God said so in His Word. In my teens, I renounced my dad as my father and adopted God in my heart.

When I was about 14, I stopped praying as often and progressively lost hope with every beating and every abusive word. Between age14-16, I attempted suicide three times through a variety of methods. At one point, I remained in kind of catatonic state where all I would do was cry and listen to sermons on TV and the radio. Hearing the Word of God ministered to my soul and gave me glimmers of hope when I had given up inside.

Nevertheless, April 1, 1990 around 10pm, God intervened providentially. It was then He let me know in the middle of a particularly desperate prayer that He would reunite me soon with my mom and family. That was a pivotal moment in my life. This revelation began in an utterly desperate and fervent prayer where suddenly, I had the sense of Someone coming for me and I ceased to speak my requests to God. Before I knew what was happening, I began to shake from head to toe and an increasing feeling of joyful anticipation, relief, and reverential fear arose in my spirit with a mounting sense that Someone (God?) was coming for me.

The thought of my impending rescue, had me burst forth, releasing a litany of praise to God in every which way I knew as I continued to tremble uncontrollably. I wondered what was going to happen to me as I felt something like a low drum roll in my spirit like something wonderful was about to happen. I wondered if I was going to finally get to die and go to heaven permanently. This increasingly ecstatic feeling lasted for what seemed like forever and as I trembled, I continued nonstop to praise Him wishing I knew how to praise Him better. Simultaneously, another layer was added. I found myself in the depths of ecstatic joy, peace, and love so great that it overrode my senses! I could not feel, for the first time in days, any pain whatsoever. Before this moment, my swollen and bruised face and body with its ever-present stinging and tenderness had caused me several sleepless nights. Instead, I felt a complete and utter peace and a tremendous love and even still another layer was added. The trembling was replaced with radiating divine warmth. This warmth could be described as a great thick blanket and a reminded me of a great hug. The scripture that comes to mind is Psalm 91.4 He shall cover you with His feathers, And under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler (NKJV BibleGateway).

I have never known anything so wonderful that it defied expression. I didn’t think I could take anymore goodness when I began to feel another layer. The soothing warmth was topped by a warmer liquid ooze that began from the top of my head and traveled to the soles of my feet enveloping me in an indescribable and marvelous love. The Scripture that comes to mind is an excerpt from Leviticus 21:12 “the crown of the anointing oil of his God [is] upon” me.

Right about then, my hand was taken by what I knew to be an angel (though I didn’t see him at this time) through a tunnel of rainbow colored light. We traveled at high speed for some distance and I remember being so thankful and blessed, I felt like I would explode with it all.

As we traveled, I could not see this angel for he was ahead of me moving very fast as I trailed a bit behind sideways, admiring the beautiful tunnel of light, curious and hopeful as to what would happen next, spiritually aglow and overflowing with euphoric emotions.

We suddenly stopped and I was aware of a multitude of angels singing ahead of us on in a heavenly language. They sang on either side of a Holy Presence that was enshrouded in smoke. Praise music in heaven is multidimensional. Every note and chord was tangible to my spirit. I saw this place through a cloud or a haze, as if my eyes were wrapped in gauze. I took in every one of these details in a moment realizing that a Holy Presence was just before me in a thick cloud.

I was standing next to the angel in complete awe and curiosity when I realized I was dead wrong to be standing upright. I quickly hit the ground doing my best to lie as flat as I could with my face down simultaneously thanking God and hoping He would be merciful on me and forgive my lack of understanding. It was there, that I was able to see the angel (not with my physical eyes but with my spiritual eyes).

The angel next to me was beautiful and strong, dressed in a polished golden armor. I wondered if it was an archangel because he was so breathtaking to behold and seemed fresh from war. He was at complete attention as if receiving orders. I perceived he was in the middle of something urgent before he was sent to get me and I felt he was eager to return to battle.

A pause, a feeling like a drum roll, and suddenly, the angel on my right angel spoke and with a thunderous voice that went through me like the sound of bass would on a speaker turned up way too high, “You shall see your mother, brothers and sisters again soon.” At the mention of this, I balled uncontrollably thanking Him (the Lord) over and over and over. Knowing it was as true as my name was. A drum roll in my spirit announced there was going to be more ….

Ultimately, in this vision, I was reassured of His Providence and the Lord, through His angel, told me to share this revelation immediately with my father. This account and its subsequent questions resulted in one of the lengthiest beatings I ever had. (Six years later, I would discover how critical this testimony was to his later conversion).

Two months later, 3 days before my 17^th birthday, my sister and I were miraculously reunited with our mom. Within a year, I was happily reunited with my siblings in Puerto Rico and proceeded to share my testimony with them, letting them know that I forgave my dad and that God had a purpose.

To this day I thank God that I obeyed and waited on Him. In June 1996 my dad died of a massive coronary in his home. The homeless woman he had taken in called the ambulance. Evidence was found indicating that my father was born again, a changed man who had accepted Christ and was serving Him in churches and homeless shelters. God was truly merciful by warning my father about his impending death in advance.

In April of 1996, my dad had his first heart attack and was told by doctors he needed quadruple bypass surgery or his life would end soon. According to his physician he was quoted as saying, “If God wants me to go then it is my time to go!” as he caused a huge scene ripping out his IV lines and leaving the hospital without a proper discharge.

I believe His Presence is a product of seeking Him in earnest prayer and thanksgiving. According to Exodus 33:15 His Presence is the ultimate provision. His Presence can be felt often on the heals of fervent prayer.

Providence is God’s activity throughout history in providing for the needs of human beings, especially those who believe in him. Counterfeit concepts of providence are sometimes seen as fate, luck, progress, serendipity, natural selection, nature, history as a divine entity (Ilumina).

There are many ways to analyze, categorize, represent, and observe His Providence. I thoroughly enjoy thinking about God’s Providence whether it is ordinary or extraordinary because I feel it helps me to get to know Him. To experience His Providence first hand is to come to believe in Him and accept Christ as our Savior. His Providence is revealed through bible study and prayer as we live our life for His glory as He designed. God’s Providence is true and everlasting forever and ever. Amen.

WORKS CITED

Colson, Charles. The Good Life: Seeking Purpose, Meaning and Truth in Your Life. Tyndale House Publishers. Wheaton, IL. 2005

Grudem, Wayne. Bible Doctrine: Essential Teachings of the Christian Faith. Zondervan. Grand Rapids. Michigan.1999.

Hacker, Diana. A Writer’s Reference. 5^th Ed. Boston: Bedford/St. Martin’s. 2003

McLaughlin, Ra. "Do Miracles Happen Today?" IIM Magazine Online 12 May 2002. 12 Oct . 2006 <http://www.thirdmill.org/newfiles/ra_mclaughlin/TH.Mclaughlin.miracles.pdf >.

“Providence, God’s Word On.” The Ilumina Bible Encyclopedia 2.1. CD-ROM. Tyndale House Publishers. Wheaton, IL. 2003.

BIBLIOGRAPHY