MuleFHL Team Offence Rankings!!

 

The MuleFHL news ranks the league’s offenses, with about five teams showing that they are a step above the rest.  Colorado has the top offense, followed very closely by the New Jersey Devils and the Philadelphia Flyers.  However, once we reach the middle-end of these standings, it really becomes a crapshoot as to which teams are more dominant, as the talent level is extremely equal, with a lot of wildcards.

 

  1. Colorado Avalanche (83.33) –

-         Peter Forsberg(87), Jarome Iginla(87), Sergei Samsonov(83), Andy Hilbert(81), Radim Vrbata(81), Marian Hossa(81)

-         With two of the league’s top players in Forsberg and Iginla, the Colorado Avalanche are a force to be reckoned with.  They have a young, dominant group of forwards who will no doubt terrorize other teams for many years to come. 

  1. New Jersey Devils (83.17) –

-         Patrick Elias(87), Petr Sykora(84), Steve Yzerman(84), Joe Thornton(83), Saku Koivu(82), Brad Isbister(79)

-         This offence is a great mix of youth and experience, skill and character, and size and speed. Look for Koivu to center the first line as Eisenbraun is fucking obsessed with him; although he does have two other centers who could take the job away from Saku, after he gets injured of course. Thornton, and Yzerman will be fighting for the injury laden Koivu’s spot all season long.

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  1. Philadelphia Flyers (83.17) –

-         Paul Kariya(86), Pavel Bure(85), Alexei Yashin(84), Brendan Shanahan(83), Keith Primeau(81), Colin Shields(80)

-         Philadelphia has offensive depth like no other team in this league.  Kariya, Bure, Yashin and Shanny are all bona-fide snipers, so the Flyers shouldn’t have any trouble scoring goals.  However, Pavel Bure and Alexei Yashin are two of the most hated players in the league, and this will likely bring this team down in the end.

  1. Ottawa Senators (82.17) –

-         Joe Sakic(87), Mario Lemieux(86), Ziggy Pallfy(83), Petr Schastlivy(80), Mike Fisher(79), Patrick Marleau(78)

-         You got Lemeiux, Sakic and Palffy.  What more do you need?  With youngsters Schastlivy, Fisher and Marleau the Senators have lots of offensive weapons to get the job done.

  1. Vancouver Canucks (81.50) –

-         Todd Bertuzzi(86), Markus Naslund(84), Ron Francis(83), Ray Whitney(80), Daniel Sedin(78), Henrik Sedin(78)

-         Where did this offense come from?  Last season, they were in the middle of the pack, but now they have the physically dominant finesse playing Todd Bertuzzi leading the way, with sniper Markus Naslund and passing wizard, Ron Francis rounding out their first line…that’s arguably the best first line in the MuleFHL.

  1. Pittsburgh Penguins (81.50) –

-         Ryan Smyth(84), Pavol Demitra(83), Radek Bonk(81), Martin Havlat(81), Sami Kapanen(81), Boris Prostenko(79)

-         A good mix of grit and skill on these top two lines, the Pittsburgh Penguins are slowly moving up the ladder in terms of offensive talent.  With Smyth there giving it 110% every night and the likes of Kapanen and Havlat skating at 110km/h down the ice, the Penguins boast an extremely exciting offense.

  1. Buffalo Sabres (81.33) –

-         Jaromir Jagr(89), Jaroslav Kristek(81), Taylor Pyatt(80), Jan Hlavac(80), Anson Carter(79), Ilya Kovalchuk(79)

-         Practice must be hell for goaltenders Tommy Salo and Martin Biron because these guys know how to score…the question is whether or not they can play together as a team.

  1. Toronto Maple Leafs (81.33) –

-         Alexei Kovalev(84), Milan Hejduk(82) Mark Parrish(81), Chris Drury(81), Mike Comrie(80), Glen Murray(80)

-         The buds are stacked with snipers and goal scorers like Kovalev, Hejduk, Murray and Parrish.  They also have guys like Comrie and Drury that are no slouches either in the scoring department.

  1. Edmonton Oilers (80.33) -

-         Doug Weight(83), Eric Lindros(83), Simon Gagne(81), Miroslav Satan(80), Jere Lehtinen(78), Todd Marchant(77)

-         First, they’ve got toughness with Weight and Lindros.  Then, there’s pure skill in Satan and Gagne.  Top it off with defensive specialists Lehtinen and Marchant…now that’s organized crime.

  1. San Jose Sharks (80.17) –

-         Daniel Alfredsson(83), Jeremy Roenick(81), Owen Nolan(81), Petr Nedved(79), Alexander Drozdetsky(79), Marco Sturm(78)

-         Alfredsson and Nolan are two of the best snipers in the game.  Roenick and Nedved are premier centers and with speedster Sturm and the young fella Drozdetsky the Sharks can light up the scoreboard just as well as any other team in the league.

  1. Tampa Bay Lightning (80.17) –

-         Brad Richards(82), Alexander Svitov(82), Vincent Lecavalier(80), Justin Williams(80), Branko Radivojevic(79), Kyle Wellwood(78)

-         Holy potential batman…these forwards have the potential to become one of the league’s best offenses as early as this year…and most of these guys can’t even grow facial hair yet.

  1. St. Louis Blues (80.00) –

-         Keith Tkachuk(82), Jamal Mayers(81), Reed Low(80), Pierre Turgeon(79), Jan Hrdina(79), Steve Kariya(79)

-         This offense is one that teams love to hate…nobody likes Tkachuk, nobody likes Mayers, and nobody likes Reed Low…unless they’re on your team of course.  I guess they’re just there to protect the pussies…Turgeon and Kariya.

  1. Detroit Red Wings (80.00) –

-         Theoren Fleury(80), Bobby Holik(80), Jeff O’Neill(80), Daymond Langkow(80), Jeff Friesen(80), Radek Dvorak(80)

-         Two basically…equally talented lines are what Detroit has to offer.  There isn’t an abundance of scoring touch, but they’ve got the kind of players who will work hard to get the ugly goals.

14.  Calgary Flames (79.67) –

-         Craig Conroy(81), Sergei Fedorov(81), Benoit Gratton(80), Andrew Brunette(79), Steve Begin(79), Gary Roberts(78)

-         Conroy and Fedorov are great all-around players who will play a regular shift, powerplay, and penalty kill.  Follow this up with some more well-rounded players, and the Flames ought to be able to play Lindy Ruff’s gameplan with ease.

  1. Boston Bruins (79.67) -

-         Adam Oates(81), Steve Sullivan(80), Aaron Asham(80), Brian Rolston(80), Tony Amonte(79), Michal Handzuz(78)

-         Don’t ask me how this offense is only average because they have the best passer in the league, a couple players who can put the puck in the net with ease, arguably the best role-player in the game in Aaron Asham, and the defensive specialist, Handzus.

  1. Dallas Stars (79.33) –

-         Mike Modano(84), Peter Bondra(80), Dean McAmmond(78), Brett Hull(78), Brian Savage(78), Joe Nieuwendyk(78)

-         Modano, Hull, Savage and Bondra are all goal hungry players.  Niewendyk is one of the best 2-way players in the game and McAmmond is really coming out now.

  1. Anaheim Mighty Ducks (79.33) –

-         Mats Sundin(82), Shane Doan(80), Bill Guerin(79), Alex Tanguay(79), Mike Watt(78), Rod Brind’Amour(78)

-         Mats Sundin is the type of player who can make any offense look good, but he won’t have that much pressure on him with the likes of Guerin’s sniping abilities and youngsters’ Doan and Tanguay just beginning to emerge.

18.  Washington Capitals (79.33) –

-         Teemu Selanne(80), Adam Deadmarsh(80), Jason Arnott(80), Marian Cisar(79), Matt Pettinger(79), Mikhail Renberg(78)

-         This is a hard-working offense that will get the job done.  They’ve got their young playoff star, Marian Cisar, and Teemu Selanne providing the skill, and they’ll likely give Matt Pettinger, the player they are grooming to become a perennial Selke candidate, an ample opportunity to show his value this season.

19.  Carolina Hurricanes (79.17) -

-         Jonathan Cheechoo(81), Jozef Vasicek(80), Yannik Perreault(79), Darcy Tucker(79), Erik Cole(78), Shane Willis(78)

-         Cheechoo is expected to carry the load this year.  But his surroundings are not too shabby either.  Vasicek, Cole and Willis are all young guys making names for themselves.  While Perreault and Tucker are are doing their jobs and doing them very well.

20.  Montreal Canadiens (79.00)–

-         Mike Peca(82), Martin Straka(81), Luc Robitaille(79), Teemu Sainomaa(78), Marcel Hossa(77), Oleg Kvasha(77)

-         This offense seems to have changed a lot over the past year…the older guys are slowly being sifted out and replaced with younger ones, like Teemu Sainomaa and Marcel Hossa.

  1. Chicago Blackhawks (79.00)–

-         Eric Daze(80), Alexei Zhamnov(80), Mikhail Nylander(80), Casey Hankinson(78), Kyle Calder(78), Geoff Sanderson(78)

-         This could very well be one of the most underrated offenses in the league.  Nobody here is overly noticeable, but they all have the ability to contribute with the best. 

22.  Nashville Predators (78.83) –

-         Scott Hartnell(81), Greg Watson(80), Pavel Brendl(79), Brian Sutherby(79), Jan Bulis(77), Jurjaj Kolnik(77)

-         This young offense seems to improve each and every year, as the Predators continue to churn out very interesting young talent.  Hartnell and Sutherby are on the verge of becoming one of the better penalty killing units in the league, while Brendl sports tremendous skill and Watson is a developing power forward. 

  1. Phoenix Coyotes (78.67)–

-         Jason Allison(84), Jeremy Adduono(79), Brendan Morrison(79), Krys Kolanos(78), Scott Young(76), Sergei Berezin(76)

-         Allison is a dynamo and Kolanos is the calder winner.  Adduono and Morrison are young and can play.  Young and Berizin have a strong knack for the net.

24.  Atlanta Thrashers (78.67) –

-         Tim Connolly(81), Norm Milley(79), Milan Bartovic(20,79), Patrick Stefan(78), Wes Mason(78), Thomas Sjostrom(77)

-         Atlanta boasts a very young, offense made up of well-rounded players.  However, if they can get the puck to Connolly in a scoring position, this offense will be very dangerous.

25.  Los Angeles Kings (78.33) –

-         Jason Spezza(80), Jozef Stumpel(79), Eric Belanger(78), Yannik Lehoux(78), Jay McClement(78), Dave Steckel(77)

-         Operation SpezzaStumpel: use mesmerizing passing skills to bounce puck off other players.  Other than Lehoux, the Kings lack snipers, but Neufeld’s obsession with snipers will likely put an end to this problem soon enough.

26.  Florida Panthers (78.33) –

-         Mike York(80), Donald Audette(79), Kristian Huselius(78), Steven Reinprecht(78), Vaclav Prospal(78), Valeri Bure(77)

-         Audette and Huselius can score…York and Prospal can pass…however, the Panthers still need some more top line talent to give them a competitive offense.

27.  Minnesota Wild (78.17) –

-         Marian Gaborik(81), Dan Cavanaugh(80), Mikko Koivu(79), Pat Kavanagh(77), Mikka Elomo(76), Sergei Zholtok(76)

-         With a very nice core of young forwards, the Wild won’t be at the basement of this category for much longer…it’s just a matter of developing a couple more competitive lines before this team begins to score excessive amounts of goals.

28.  Columbus Blue Jackets (78.00) -

-         Johan Witehall(79), John LeClair(79), Alexander Mogilny(79), Matthieu Darche(78), Andreas Dackell(77), David Vyborny(76)

-         LeClair and Mogilny are top notch scorers.  Witehall and Darche are young and well rounded.  Vyborny can score and Dackell is a great 2-way player.

29.  New York Islanders (77.67) –

-         Mariusz Czerkawski(79), Steve Gainey(78), Boyd Devereaux(78), Raffi Torres(77), Marty Murray(77), Clarke Wilm(77)

-          The Isles offense is nothing special, but they’ll keep their team in the game.  They’ll allow the Isles’ extremely young defense and goaltending get the practice they need in order to become stars…some of the young forwards will also get an opportunity to develop their skills at the pro level very soon.

30.  New York Rangers (74.83) –

-         Todd White(78), Jamie Wright(77), Steve Heinze(75), Jaroslav Sklenar(74), Ryan Vandenbusche(73), Alexander Selifanov(72)

-         This offense was left in ruins for Richard Halvorson, but the acquisition of Todd White makes things a bit less drastic.  Look for some of the team’s recent draftees to step in later this season to fill some of the holes.