'Twas right before Hanukkah,
from New York to Hollywood Hills
Speculation ran high
'bout the next appearance of Mr. Sills;
Savings accounts were replenished,
Ticketmaster bookmarked,
Rumors abounded,
and old obsessions were re-sparked.
Everyone was finding it hard
to sleep in their beds
With Douglas in yellow pumps
dancing through their heads
And still seein' those men
donnin' them silly hats
We settled in resigned,
with hot chocolate and our cats;
When from Mandelbaum there arose a great clatter -
We sprang from our beds and online began to chatter
What was he saying? -
fingers flew over keys,
Screams of delight:
"Let it be true, please!"
The moon over Florida gleamed suddenly brighter
'Twas true, he was coming,
two cities, each a six-nighter;
And what to our wondering eyes should appear
But that same amazing man we'd fallen for last year.
Though the hair was shorter,
the repartee was witty
Yes, we recognized the man
before he sang a single ditty.
More rapid than his jokes,
his followers they came;
From New York,
from everywhere,
by car and by plane
Now Nancy!
the Rosatis!
Now Kelly
and Anne!
On Honigs!
On Amy!
On Susanne
and Jan!
"To the Sunshine State!
To see his new show!
Linda who?
I heard Douglas!
Now let's all go!"
As dry leaves that before Florida hurricanes fly
With a force that no one could stop if they try;
So to the stage door the Sills women they flew
With cameras and Playbills to see Douglas anew.
And then, in a twinkling,
a new rumor was born
And nobody could sleep from night until morn;
Barely recovered,
we turned collectively 'round
As back came Sir Percy,
with that familiar bound.
He was dressed like a tiger,
from his head to those pumps;
He giggled aloud as he walked,
with joyful little jumps
His cane he twirled merrily;
on his hat his feather quivered
And everyone,
to the last row,
sighed and shivered.
His eyes -
how they twinkled!
His dimples -
how endearing!
His grin was infectious,
his adlibs had them cheering;
His droll belly laugh rang out again and again,
Causing everyone to praise the creation of men;
The ring on his finger,
at his throat such frou-frou
Made us forget we had ever bid it adieu.
A fountain he appeared,
jokes and laughter out they spit;
But those in the splash zone
didn't mind being hit.
He was articulate, brilliant,
his hilarious old self,
And I swooned when I saw him,
in spite of myself.
With a mirthful growl
and a "Well, ssssink ME!"
He soon had the crowd guffawing with glee;
He danced and he sang;
elderly widows cried with joy:
"Wow, you are good,
and such a handsome boy!"
Then taking his bows
and thanking Lin and Frank
He exited the stage,
and all our spirits sank.
We wondered when he'd return,
but a sound gave us hope;
For we could hear him still,
as we went home, trying to cope -
Methought we heard him laughing yet,
twirling his cane, exclaiming, "La!
Happy Hanukkah to all,
and to all...
TAAATAAAAAAA!"
Barbara Trenn
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