The Point System
by Shane Sacco

The First Decree

  • When I rule the world, everyone will have points.
  • If you reach zero, you die...
  • If you reach 1,000, you recieve sex from anyone you want. In order to redeem the sex, simply give the person you want to have sex with, the sex card (in the same format as a get out of jail-free card).
  • Everyone person will begin with 250 as a default and addition points per year alive. Ex. Greg recieve 250 points upon my rule and 15 extra for his age. His total points being 265.
    • Kevin will be dead by default, considering he'll have mastubated at least 500 times in one day (each sesson is .5 points after the allowed 1 in the morning and 1 in the night)
  • A person gains 1 point when they score heterosexually, and then extra 5 points following for each heterosexual partner involved and 1 point deducted for every extra homosexual.
  • Yet again, Kevin will be dead by default
  • A -10 points will be deducted for homosexual comments
    • Upon this, Jimmy, as well, will be dead by defualt.
  • Kwee, being our basic unit of measurement, does not follow this point pattern, if she gains or loses a pound, we make Kwee eat enough food to reach the next number with 1 significant figure

  • Shane Sacco, myself, will determine the amount of points deducted or gained for daily wickedness and/or explosions...(found lower in page)
  • The Second Decree

  • Jim Carrey will receive power of the USA and an unlimited supply of points.
  • Terrorists will lose all points and a global bounty is placed on their head for 100,000 points and a pygmi chimpanzi. The terrorist will be delivered alive to my headquaters where 100 gay men will anally rape with gaint spiked penis'
  • Peter Erikson can, and will not die.
  • 711 will be given their own global holiday where 1 point can be redeemed at the participating locations
  • The following points system will work for religion:
    Judaism, Catholics, Muslim, and Christian - No points Recieved.
    Mormon, Jade, and any other religions with less than 20,000 members but more than 10,000 - 50 points recieved. (Rock on minorities...)
  • If you can successfully show any representitive of the SWGB (Shane World Governmental Body) that you can lick your elbow while hopping around on one leg and singing toxicity...congradulations...500 points
  • P2P - You can use points as money if needed. The following conversion will work. 1 point = 7.523 francs.
  • If you are caught acting like jon lieberman in public, you lose 5 points and anyone in sight can beat the ass out of you.
  • Bowler - point awarded...
    Points = (Average of 3 game - hejasacking) * arc of curve / janetē
  • Forever, if you have any point value with 69 in it, you recieve a free copy of the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
  • Any person with a name that rhymes with a sexually organ, i'm sorry but if it rhymes with bj, u lose a million points and die. Sorry.
  • Bill Nye will teach us science through the television everynight at 8 o'clock, and he will be given joe clancy as a pet.
  • Rebellic Clauses

  • At this point, My Name will be changed from my original to Emperor Sac.
  • All Rebels will be exterminated by My followers led by Sac Knight Rya.
  • Mark hamill will be the first to be destroyed, despite his character luke is a rebel and he is only a character playing a part, he will still be taken out in the rebellic extermination.
  • The Weekly Wickicity


    The failure to include at least 5 acts of wickedness and responsive explosions will result in a 5 point deduction.
    10+ wicked/explosion acts you will recieve .5 points and a cookie of your choice....
    25+ - 1 points, cookie of your choice and a wicked pinjo sticker
    50+ - 2 points, cookie, sticker, and a free shite cd