QUESTIONS, ALWAYS QUESTIONS.... 

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? 

How do I set my laser printer on stun? 

How is it possible to have a civil war? 

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? 

If G-d dropped acid, would he see people? 

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? 

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? 

If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it? 

If you're born again, do you have two bellybuttons? 

If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? 

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? 

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? 

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? 

What happens when none of your bees wax? 

Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket? 

If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why 

isn't the whole airplane made out of the stuff? 

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream? 

If most car accidents occur within five miles of home, why doesn't everyone just move 10 miles away? 

Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as 

ghosts but as mattresses? 

Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims? (that’s really sick) 

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? 

What do Bill Clinton and Dan Quayle have in common? Everything.