Bumper Stickers2 BEST OF BUMPER STICKERS: Could you drive any better if I shoved that cell phone up your ASS? If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you! Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole.... 100,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest? Your gene pool needs a little chlorine You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you DON"T PISS ME OFF! I"M RUNNING OUT OF PLACES TO HIDE THE BODIES!!! You are depriving some village of its IDIOT Save your breath....you'll need it to blow up your date! Forget world peace...visualize using your turn signal My Hockey Mom can beat up your Soccer Mom!! Grow your own dope, plant a man!! All men are animals, some just make better pets Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them I used to have a handle on life, but it broke WANTED: MEANINGFUL OVERNIGHT RELATIONSHIP BEER: it's not just for breakfast anymore So you're a feminist....isn't that cute I need someone really bad....are YOU really bad? Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder All men are idiots...I married their king The more you complain, the longer God makes you live IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs Out of my mind...back in five minutes Hang up and drive Rehab is for quitters... Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips I took an IQ test and the results were negative Where there's a will....I want to be in it It's lonely at the top, but you eat better Don't drink and drive...you might hit a bump and spill your drink We are born naked, wet and hungry...then things get worse Friends help you move, REAL friends help you move bodies Consciousness: That annoying time between naps Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? Be nice to your kids...they will pick out your nursing home Always remember you're unique...just like everyone else HONK IF YOU WANT TO SEE MY FINGER!!